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Clips from The Good Place - Derek (S02E02)

"Pudding won't work!"
The Good Place
"It's okay, Michael. Just relax."
The Good Place
"In order to..."
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"accomplish what I need to accomplish."
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"Whoa, I'm way out on a limb here."
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"And I'm all alone."
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"No, you're not."
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"Janet."
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"It's too hard to explain,"
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"that you just can't understand."
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"but that's also kind of a bummer?"
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"Oh, yes!"
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"Frozen yogurt."
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"Correct. But why do you want a food..."
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"No, no, don't... don't worry about that."
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"Oh, yeah, okay."
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"Let's make all these restaurants frozen yogurt."
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"Okeydokey."
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"Would you like to try it?"
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"Oh, yeah."
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"Which means it's perfect."
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"Let's bring in the residents."
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"I don't know what just happened,"
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"but I'm happy you're happy."
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"Michael."
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"Yes. Sorry."
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"Oh. I can't do it."
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"It's dangerous, is what it is."
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"Vicky could find out, and then the..."
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"you know, the plan, the whole plan..."
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"Given the situation, it's far safer"
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"to initiate the self-destruct."
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"here's the reason."
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"See, I promised the four humans that we would escape"
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"to the Good Place once and for all."
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"And without you, we stand zero chance of ever making it there."
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"The new Janet will be able to help you with that."
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"See, it's also because of, um..."
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"What if Vicky found out?"
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"You already asked me that."
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"Why are you making such a big deal"
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"about turning me into a marble forever?"
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"Because of reasons."
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"There are reasons. They exist,"
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"and I just don't want to explain them right now."
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"What are the reasons?"
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"They're reasons, Janet!"
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"Okay, but what are they?"
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"The reason is friends."
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"You're my friend, Janet. That's why I can't kill you."
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"We have been through so much together."
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"I mean, yeah, sure, for you, you know,"
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"each time I rebooted you, you met me all over again."
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"our relationship has become important."
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"You're my oldest, my truest,"
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"I can't just get rid of you"
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"and replace you with some other Janet I don't even know."
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"Well, well, well."
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"Michael."
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"I'm glad you said that."
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"that I built."
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"Two peas in a pod."
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"One of whom needs to kill the other one immediately."
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"Michael, come on. Kill me."
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"This problem you're facing, it's about emotion, right?"
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"That's a human problem."
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"So maybe we should consult"
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"our most problematic human."
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"So, let me get this straight."
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"because you're causing earthquakes"
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"because you're sad about Jason..."
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"to whom you were once married..."
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"because he's currently sleeping with Tahani?"
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"meant this literally,"
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"but that might be too much information."
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"I mean, he's a ding dong, but also a straight hottie."
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"But more important, what you're going through"
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"Actually, right now, you kind of are."
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"And, yeah, it sucks."
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"You just need to get drunk and go dancing."
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"You'll forget all about Jason."
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"listen to some No Doubt,"
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"dye your hair."
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"You'll be totally fine in, like, two seconds."
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"is to get another dude and just go to town."
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"- What about Michael? - Extraordinarily bad idea."
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"Yeah, right. Forget it."
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"You're awesome."
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"You contain all the knowledge in the universe,"
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"This is just a blip."
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"So, was it helpful?"
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"So I'm going to go get it, girl."
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"- Get what? - Unclear."
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"I'll get everything, just to be safe."
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"by watching what I say around Jason and Tahani."
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"I can tell you this honestly."
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"It makes you look bottom heavy."
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"It does, doesn't it? Ugh."
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"I'm gonna go to my void for a little while."
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"I just need to spend some time alone"
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"and focus on myself."
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"- Hi, there. - Hello."
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"Janet, who's that man?"
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"This is my new rebound boyfriend, Derek."
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"I made him!"
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"Hi, I'm Derek."
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"You must be Mich... oh."
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"into my ear holes about you."
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"Michael, Michael, Michael,"
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"Clichael, Clichael, Clichael."
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"Janet, you can't make a person."
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"I should create a rebound guy."
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"Derek."
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"I'm her boyfriend, and she made me."
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"Whoa, look at this glass."
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"Oh, my God."
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"What's going on right now?"
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"It's my first time making someone,"
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"This could be very dangerous."
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"Well, maybe not 800 reboots ago,"
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