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Clips from The Big Bang Theory - The Thanksgiving Decoupling (S07E07)

"It's not real. Yes, it is."
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"I think you're the one who fell over."
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"Howard. Cow tipping: real or not?"
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"Mmm."
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"Come on, it'll be fun."
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"Please? Bernadette's bringing her dad"
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"It'd actually be nice to not hear"
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"but every year you prepare a terrible meal"
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"Do our traditions mean nothing to you?"
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"I want to go. Yeah, me, too."
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"I'm in. Sheldon."
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"But if her food is delicious, Thanksgiving is ruined,"
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"♪ Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state ♪"
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"♪ Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... Wait! ♪"
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"♪ The Earth began to cool"
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"♪ We built the Wall ♪ We built the pyramids ♪"
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"♪ Math, Science, History, unraveling the mystery ♪"
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"We do."
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"Now I know how the African slaves felt."
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"to labor under the yoke of the white man."
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"at Wolowitz's mom's with one of the greatest tragedies"
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"in the history of mankind?"
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"Yes."
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"Which was surprising, since we were at a strip club."
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"Wait, you went to a chapel?"
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"you know those are real, right?"
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"Yeah, they are."
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"But it... didn't seem real."
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"and watch the game."
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"You just took it."
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"Thanks. What's wrong with your mom?"
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"Turns out an apple pie a day does not keep the doctor away."
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"I gave her enough pain meds to choke a... well, her."
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"I have a better idea."
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"If you think you're gonna make me"
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"do all this by myself, you're crazy."
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"Coming from Africa to America."
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"Sheldon, that's completely inappropriate."
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"I can't believe you're married to that idiot."
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"It could be because you said yes to marrying Zack,"
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"So how do I undo this?"
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"Great, well, what do I have to do?"
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"without an Indian providing the food."
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"- You know, my mom's been to... - Arizona."
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"She rode one of those mules down in the Grand Canyon."
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"It smells wonderful."
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"Because I, too, know... Sheldon."
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"What's with you?"
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"Uh, sure. Great."
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"Bernadette, you're on corn, gravy and yam detail."
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"That's right, I see you."
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"Okay, if you have any questions,"
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"Did you guys know Penny married Zack three years ago?"
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"What? Wha...?"
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"A little in college."
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"Listen to Stretch."
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"I've kept my marriage together for 35 years."
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"I'm trying to watch the game. Shut up."
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"How do you not make a first down there?"
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"They passed against a nickel defense."
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"before I was allowed to do my homework."
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"Come on."
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"Oh, I love a good blitz, especially with sour cream."
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"Get it?"
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"so I just thought it would..."
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"Well, you might have to cook for one more"
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"because she invited Zack."
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"- What? - Ooh!"
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"My, my."
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"That's why I sit."
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"You remember the Thanksgiving game"
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"And then he did."
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"I'm sorry to hear that."
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"So was the man who owned the local liquor store."
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"Oh, thanks."
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"you were never old enough to have a beer with the man."
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"No, sir."
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"He did try to give me one for my high school graduation,"
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"I never had a beer with my dad, either."
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"I can't believe Penny's married to Zack."
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"He's sweet, he's tall, handsome."
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"How's it going out there?"
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"What are they doing?"
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"about how his dad isn't alive anymore,"
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"Stir the gravy."
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"I'll be back in like five, ten minutes."
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"Yeah, okay, great."
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"Okay."
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"Ooh. Ooh. Ooh."
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"You know neither of us thought this was real."
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"You married him instead of me?"
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"Hang on. You know what?"
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"I'm starting to think"
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"Oh, no. Are you dying?"
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"I'm about to. Sign the paper."
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"Did somebody say "pie"?!"
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"the bathroom clowns"
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"right now!"
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"It's funny when she's mad."
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"It's okay. Don't worry about it."
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"Mmm."
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"Sheldon."
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"I don't think they have pigskin."
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"It'll be for love."
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"I'm sorry, too."
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"I know I'm hard on you,"
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"Yeah... uh, look. It is scientifically impossible"
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"for a person to tip a cow."
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"Even you, with your stocky build"
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"and lumberjack shoulders, you couldn't do it."
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"Oh, stop it."
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"I've seen you eat, like, a million hamburgers."
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"Look, I'm telling you I've done it, okay?"
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"I clearly remember the cow standing up"
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"and then the cow on its side."
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"Were you drunk?"
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"Mmm. I'm gonna say... not."
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"my mom over when she's snoring."
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"Aw."
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"You know, I've been told that a bald refusal"
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