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Clips from The Cleveland Show - Birth of a Salesman (S01E01)

"All right, Herbie Hancock's coming to town."
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"- I love Herbie Hancock. - Me too. "Rockit.""
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"You get two more times, then a final warning and then I go to work angry."
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"I'm proud of you, son."
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"Okay, Brown. Go draw their fire."
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"And then I tried my hand as a singing spokesman for a furniture flea market."
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"Give me a Stoli Red Bull, sugar-free."
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"- Everything okay here, Tim? - Oh, yes, thank you."
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"You didn't tell me he was..."
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"Okay, here's your desk and your phone."
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"Hey, my phone is filled with silver dollars!"
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"No!"
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"All right."
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"Of course, she'd sleep with them."
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"I'm gonna go and take out the trash."
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"You're watching Ike Turner Classic Movies."
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"Why'd you make me treat you like this, huh, huh?"
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"Hurray!"
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"Tim, you wanna come out with me..."
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"Okay, I might just go buy myself a top hat."
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"That's correct."
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"Just trying to be as cool as you."
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"Hey, what are you kids doing?"
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"You use it. Use it, man!"
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"So how did your life turn out?"
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"...I'm now responsible for two ill-mannered stepchildren..."
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"You should come out with me on my calls today. We could catch up."
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"You better stop cleaning up around here, or things are gonna get messy."
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"- Like this. - No."
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"And don't divorce the sheets. The sheets must never be divorced."
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"...you would spend on that beer maybe for a sandwich for me?"
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"Go ahead and laugh at the financially struggling bear."
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"So were you serious about the penis-for-steak deal?"
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"And I am proud to be your wife."
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"As a matter of fact, I've never even cried about it. Not one tear."
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"Just a family."
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"That boy's in denial. He's got to get it out."
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"Tim, you are dumb."
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"Bye-bye."
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"Okay."
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"Here's your tea, Mr. Waterman."
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"Hey, Cleveland, check it out! Huh?"
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"My name is Cleveland Brown And I am proud to be"
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"Right back in my hometown With my new family"
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"There's old friends and new friends And even a bear"
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"Through good times and bad times It's true love we share"
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"And so I found a place Where everyone will know"
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"My happy mustache face This is The Cleveland Show"
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"Hey, old man, buy me Herbie Hancock tickets."
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"You don't know nothing about Herbie Hancock."
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"What? Don't you tell me I don't know about Herbie Hancock."
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"- "Rockit." - That ain't "Rockit." That's "Axel F.""
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"How does "Rockit" go?"
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"Oh, doggone it. Now you've got me doing it."
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"You've Herbie Hancock-blocked me."
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"Kids, I've told you three times now to go make your beds."
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"I already made my bed, Miss Donna."
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"Is that sarcasm, Junior?"
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"Because if there's one thing I do not understand, it's sarcasm."
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"No. I'm telling the truth."
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"Oh, well, then thank you."
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"What kind of idiot makes their bed?"
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"Damn fat fool done made his bed? Shoot."
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"Now I gotta make my bed. Damn."
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"Now, maybe you could work on eating a little slower, and not as much..."
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"...and not so often, and maybe you could exercise."
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"- Maybe you could get a job. Heh-heh-heh. - Ha, ha, oh."
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"You know I been looking. I just haven't found the right one yet."
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"Last week, I answered an ad for an old grizzled cop two days from retirement."
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"But I'm two days from retirement."
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"All right, I'll go."
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"Oh, well, I'm two days from retirement."
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"Living room, bedroom, dinette"
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"We got it, you need it"
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"You'll find it, it's just like It's just like a mini mall"
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"Hey, hey, you heard me Come shop I said flea market"
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"Stoolbend, it's just like It's just like a mini mall"
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"Hey, hey, living room, bedroom, dinette"
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"Oh, yeah You can find them at the market"
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"We talking about flea market"
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"Stoolbend, it's just like It's just like a mini mall"
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"Hey, hey, don't stop Let's make it a dance"
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"Come on now, to the left, to the left To the right, to the right"
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"Let's do this dance Hey, to the left, to the left"
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"To the right, to the right Let's make this a dance"
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"Flea market, Stoolbend It keeps you a-jumping"
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"It's just like, it's just like a mini mall"
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"- Can I have a beer, please? - Me too."
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"I've got my father's hips."
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"Just order a beer, fool."
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"Whoa, watch out for this guy, huh?"
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"Cleveland, what's up with the short fuse, man?"
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"Oh, I'm just having trouble finding gainful employment."
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"- Oh, yeah, yeah. Finding a job is hard. - I've never found one."
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"Yeah, I had to ask Jesus to lead me to the job of my dreams."
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"And when he did, I knew that he was the guy..."
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"...that I wanted to keep going to to ask for things."
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"Last year, I asked Jesus for tickets for the ESPYs. He didn't come through."
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"I just watched it on my plasma."
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"- In your mom's basement? - Shut up."
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"You know, Cleveland, there's an opening in my department..."
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"...down at the cable company. I could put in a good word for you."
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"Telemarketing?"
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"Yes. Yeah. Why does everyone always say it like that?"
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"Telemarketing is the chatter of the global marketplace."
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"Ring-ring. Hello? Cleveland, it's your future."
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"Are you going to answer it? Or quietly whisper to me:"
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""Tell them I'm not here.""
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"Plus, for every new employee I bring in, I get a $200 bonus."
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"And I sure could use it after I donated all that money to help fight bear AIDS."
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"Did you get the bear to wear the condom?"
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"Oh, cool. Cubicles."
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"Hey, good morning, Mr. Waterman."
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"Say pineapple if you want me to get security."
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"Oh, no. Mr. Waterman, this is Cleveland, the guy I was telling you about."
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"The keypad has several buttons with numbers and other things on them."
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"You probably just use the ones with the numbers, though, I would think."
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"Okay, so I got you down for one deluxe package with high-speed Internet."
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"No. Thank you, sir. I just made my first sale."
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"Holy smokes. I've never seen beginner's luck like that before."
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