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Clips from Please Like Me - Porridge (S04E04)

"taking a lovely little boat ride out on the seas and leaving me behind."
Please Like Me
"- I do not get seasick. - 100%!"
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"100% you said you get seasick."
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"I don't even know why we're talking about the boat again."
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"Hey, but you brought it up. It is the stupidest..."
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"This is the stupidest, the stupidest..."
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"Fuck, I just don't even know."
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"I just think probably that you just hate me."
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"No, you hate me."
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"It's just so clear, every time you have, like, a couple of drinks"
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"that you just hate me"
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"and I wish you would just break up with me"
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"so we didn't have to bother anymore."
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"Fine. We're broken up, then. Done."
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"How was it?"
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"- I want to go back to the camp site. - Why?"
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"Yeah, it was, um... it was pretty bad."
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"The, um, policeman asked us if we knew him,"
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"and when we said no,"
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"he asked us why we were there and none of us could answer."
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"- (JOSH) Him? - The body."
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"Oh."
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"Just kept bouncing back open."
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"Jesus Christ."
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"We just looked like the worst people."
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"Arnold, you were absolutely right."
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"I feel a bit sick."
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"(LAID-BACK MUSIC)"
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"I'm sorry about last night."
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"It's just sometimes when you're drunk"
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"it's fun to pretend to be single for 20 minutes,"
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"but then you hate it and I'm sorry and let's never fight again."
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"(THUNDER RUMBLES, RAIN PATTERS)"
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"(PLAYFUL MUSIC)"
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"(CHAOTIC MUSIC)"
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"- (ELLA LAUGHS) - (ARNOLD) Fuck!"
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"Fuck! Fuck!"
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"I think I'm bleeding."
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"I'd love an ambush for a birthday present."
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"(JOSH) You're doing so good, Arnold."
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"Just like a big brave man, a big brave strong man."
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"(ELLA) So brave."
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"I mean, I love being alone."
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"Why would you 'un-alone' me by surprise"
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"Good as new."
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"(JOSH MOANS SOFTLY)"
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"- I'm gonna come. - Yeah?"
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"You're gonna make me come."
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"(ARNOLD MOANS)"
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"What can I... what can I do to help?"
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"Um, no, really, I'm fine."
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"No, no, no, we can make this happen."
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"- Really? - Yeah."
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"Uh..."
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"Maybe I'll just..."
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"- Yeah? - Yeah, I'll do it. Okay."
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"Okay. Pants."
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"Okay."
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"- (LAUGHS) - What's wrong?"
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"Have you got, like, a little tissue?"
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"(QUIRKY MUSIC)"
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"(INDISTINCT P.A. ANNOUNCEMENT)"
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"♪ Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh... ♪"
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"(REGISTER BEEPS)"
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"I love corn chips."
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"You staying up to watch the tennis tonight?"
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"I'd love to watch the tennis, except I'm stuck here."
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"- Man's gotta eat! - Yeah, okay."
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"(JOSH) I have this memory of just loving him"
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"and the more I try and get it back, the more I strangle it."
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"- And I just... - Yes, I know!"
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"Mm, and clarinets don't ruin 'Shine Bright Like a Diamond'."
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"Mmm... They probably would, actually."
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"Absolutely would. Sorry. Just trying to be supportive."
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"I just have to break up with him."
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"No, no, no, no, just take a step back here."
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"Try and get some perspective."
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"Everything looks disgusting from too close, like skin."
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"No, it's been decided."
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"I've been trying so hard not to fight with him."
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"And then what happens?"
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"we're arguing about the right way to chop an onion."
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"so you can stop worrying about that."
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"The thing is that you're assuming he doesn't like you, you know?"
Please Like Me
"And I feel like maybe you assume that a lot of people don't like you."
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"So when Josh says to you you're chopping the onion wrong,"
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"what you hear is, "You're not the boyfriend I want,""
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"when really all he's saying is, "You're chopping the onion wrong.""
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"No, I just want him to say, "You're doing a really great job."
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"- That doesn't sound like Josh. - (LAUGHS)"
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"Don't know who that sounds like, to be honest."
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"Definitely not someone we would become friends with."
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"(MAN) Hey. Hey!"
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"Excuse me. (CLEARS THROAT)"
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"Hey, excuse me."
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"Yes?"
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"Can I ask you something?"
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"- What? - Are you married?"
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"(SNORTS)"
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"Hey! Hey, wait!"
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"You don't have to be rude. I'm just asking you a question."
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"Hey, excuse... excuse me."
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"You're being very rude, young lady!"
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"- Oh, fuck off! Leave me alone! - All right!"
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"- Get lost! Leave me alone! - All right, I'm sorry."
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"Crazy bitch!"
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"(VOICE-MAIL) Hi. I'm Josh. I'm not here."
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"I'm sorry. Leave a message. Goodbye."
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"Uh, hi, luvvie. I'm sorry I missed your call before."
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"I hope you're having a really lovely time camping"
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"and I really hope that Hannah's having a good time too."
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"Fireworks are ready! Are you ready?"
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"Josh just told me he's breaking up with Arnold."
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"What? No, no, no, no, no."
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"I am in love with Hannah for doing this."
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"My whole stash!"
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"- Oh, shit, I really stuffed up. - What do you mean?"
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"I just told Arnold that Josh was still in love with him."
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"- Why would you do that? - Are you paying attention?!"
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"I was just trying to be helpful."
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