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Clips from MacGyver - Can Opener (S01E01)

"- What? - Ready?"
MacGyver
"I said don't eyeball me, convict!"
MacGyver
"Let's go!"
MacGyver
"Sorry, sorry."
MacGyver
"How many old guys you see in here?"
MacGyver
"You think I lasted this long by making trouble?"
MacGyver
"Great book."
MacGyver
"I've already read it."
MacGyver
"Not this copy."
MacGyver
"Use those sparingly."
MacGyver
"The way you're making friends, you'll need 'em."
MacGyver
"Deputy Warden to H-Block."
MacGyver
"Deputy Warden to H-Block."
MacGyver
"We have a personnel problem."
MacGyver
"and change Mac's work assignment."
MacGyver
"Yeah, it's not really hacking, Jack."
MacGyver
"Hang on a second."
MacGyver
"The Deputy Warden's computer"
MacGyver
"isn't networked, so it's just an ordinary PC."
MacGyver
"Okay, there you go."
MacGyver
"Yes. I knew that was it."
MacGyver
""Jail"... what an idiot."
MacGyver
"It was in sleep mode, Jack."
MacGyver
"Oh."
MacGyver
"You literally could have hit any key."
MacGyver
"- Okay. - All right, let's see"
MacGyver
"if you can Forrest Gump your way through this."
MacGyver
"Mm-hmm."
MacGyver
"You see that file on the desktop labeled "work detail"?"
MacGyver
"- Mm-mm. - On the computer desktop."
MacGyver
"- Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, okay. - Click that."
MacGyver
"All right, scroll down."
MacGyver
"All right, now highlight that line"
MacGyver
"that says Mac's name and inmate number and hit control-X."
MacGyver
"- Okay. - Now scroll down"
MacGyver
"and click right where it says "laundry,""
MacGyver
"and hit control-V."
MacGyver
"That's some pretty serious hacker skills,"
MacGyver
"You changed an entry in a spreadsheet, Jack."
MacGyver
"You could maybe get fired from an accounting firm."
MacGyver
"Yeah, well, I feel like a hacker."
MacGyver
"But more importantly, now Mac and Nacho Cheese"
MacGyver
"can spend some high-quality time together."
MacGyver
"Two million."
MacGyver
"What's that?"
MacGyver
"I'm busting out of here and, uh,"
MacGyver
"for two million, I'll let you tag along."
MacGyver
"Really?"
MacGyver
"What makes me so lucky?"
MacGyver
"When I get out of here,"
MacGyver
"I'm gonna need some money to disappear."
MacGyver
"So a little birdie told me you were the only guy in here"
MacGyver
"with some real cash."
MacGyver
"You know what they say about birds."
MacGyver
"They don't live very long."
MacGyver
"Actually, a Laysan Albatross can live up to 40 years."
MacGyver
"I read a lot."
MacGyver
"So you're a smart guy."
MacGyver
"I'm smart enough to know who you are."
MacGyver
"You bought yourself a nice life in here,"
MacGyver
"but it'd be much better on the outside."
MacGyver
"Go on and get out of here, go."
MacGyver
"Go!"
MacGyver
"These are the Manos Sangrientas."
MacGyver
"Soldiers from a rival cartel"
MacGyver
"trying to muscle in on El Noche's business."
MacGyver
"If you want to get close to El Noche, you got to know"
MacGyver
"the other players involved."
MacGyver
"There's plenty of territory to go around."
MacGyver
"We just want a split."
MacGyver
"And you don't want a war."
MacGyver
"a towel soaked in water can pack a hell of a punch."
MacGyver
"Wrap the whole thing in a sheet for extra range,"
MacGyver
"and you've got yourself a weapon"
MacGyver
"from the Middle Ages called a flail."
MacGyver
"Time to get medieval on these guys."
MacGyver
"Big mistake, smart guy!"
MacGyver
"This is a war, and you just picked a side"
MacGyver
"and a chance those two vatos are gonna kill the both of us!"
MacGyver
"Open two!"
MacGyver
"You eyeballing me, convict?"
MacGyver
"No."
MacGyver
"Don't backtalk me, boy. Out of line."
MacGyver
"I know I'm pretty, but I ain't that pretty."
MacGyver
"Hands on the bars."
MacGyver
"Arms up. Arms up."
MacGyver
"So what about, uh, what about El Nacho?"
MacGyver
"He say yes? He agree to it?"
MacGyver
"El Noche?"
MacGyver
"- Whatever. - No."
MacGyver
"But I think he will."
MacGyver
"All right, that's good."
MacGyver
"In the meantime, I'm gonna need you to get me a few things."
MacGyver
"Yeah, yeah, I'll get you whatever you want."
MacGyver
"Let's go."
MacGyver
"I was just gonna get some much-needed supplies."
MacGyver
"Well, they can wait. We're short-staffed on D-Block."
MacGyver
"Get your ass over there."
MacGyver
"Yes, sir."
MacGyver
"Yes, sir, I'll just get those supplies"
MacGyver
"You'll head right over now."
MacGyver
"Move it."
MacGyver
"Yes, sir."
MacGyver
"Yes, sir."
MacGyver
"Hey, sweetheart."
MacGyver
"to D-Block before I could get Mac"
MacGyver
"the supplies he needs. It's nowhere near his cell."
MacGyver
"I might as well be on another planet,"
MacGyver
"The op's blown."
MacGyver
"We got to pull Mac out."
MacGyver
"No, I'm not ready to scrub the mission."
MacGyver
"Mac's life is at stake."
MacGyver
"Listen."
MacGyver
"I know Mac would not want to be pulled out just yet."
MacGyver
"Look, I may not know Mac as well as you or Jack,"
MacGyver
"but I know prison."
MacGyver
"And when things go bad, they go bad fast."
MacGyver
"If we don't pull Mac out, we might not get another chance."
MacGyver
"Hey, okay, I get it, Riley, but I'm with Patti."
MacGyver
"I say we leave him."
MacGyver
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