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Clips from Seinfeld - The Handicap Spot (S04E04)

"I know he's not gonna want to move."
Seinfeld
"- Are you serious? - You don't know what it means to him."
Seinfeld
"Once he gets it, he doesn't go out for weeks."
Seinfeld
"How about this: You put your car in the good spot."
Seinfeld
"Yeah, we ought to all get a house and live together out here."
Seinfeld
"That's a good idea. Tell you what, chuckles..."
Seinfeld
"...I'll give you permission to sublet my room right now."
Seinfeld
"Look at this. There's no spaces here."
Seinfeld
"- Excuse me. You getting out? - No."
Seinfeld
"Why don't you take the handicapped spot?"
Seinfeld
"- You think? - No, no. We'll find a space."
Seinfeld
"- There's spaces in the other lot. - I don't wanna walk that far."
Seinfeld
"What if a handicapped person needs it?"
Seinfeld
"- No, come on, they don't drive. - Yes, they do."
Seinfeld
"Have you ever seen a handicapped person pull into a space and park?"
Seinfeld
"The space is there, they must drive."
Seinfeld
"So if you can drive, you're not handicapped?"
Seinfeld
"We're not gonna be long. We gotta get to the party."
Seinfeld
"They want to be treated just like everybody else."
Seinfeld
"That's why those spaces are always empty."
Seinfeld
"He's right. It's the same thing with the feminists."
Seinfeld
"They want everything to be equal. Everything."
Seinfeld
"But when the check comes, where are they?"
Seinfeld
"What does that mean?"
Seinfeld
"Yeah."
Seinfeld
"- All right, I'm pulling in. - Go ahead, George."
Seinfeld
"- George! - Come on. It's five minutes."
Seinfeld
"Don't forget where the car is parked."
Seinfeld
"Do you believe the deal we got on this?"
Seinfeld
"- A big-screen TV at that price? - What a sale, huh?"
Seinfeld
"And how about that store delivering it tonight."
Seinfeld
"We're gonna be swimming in thank-yous."
Seinfeld
"Why did I get the veggieburger?"
Seinfeld
"You got a veggieburger, so I got one. It's like eating a loaf of crumbs."
Seinfeld
"No one's gonna have a better gift than this big-screen TV."
Seinfeld
"Good for them. Love the Drake."
Seinfeld
"Got to love the Drake."
Seinfeld
"Hey, what's going on over here?"
Seinfeld
"What's going on?"
Seinfeld
"Some jerk parked in the handicapped spot..."
Seinfeld
"...so this woman in a wheelchair had to wheel up this incline."
Seinfeld
"Had to take her to Saint Elizabeth's."
Seinfeld
"- Is she okay? - I don't know."
Seinfeld
"We're just waiting for the owner of this car to show up."
Seinfeld
"He may not get out alive."
Seinfeld
"Sons of bitches."
Seinfeld
"I'd like to get my hands on him myself, but I gotta take off."
Seinfeld
"- They'll kill us. - You happy? Are you happy now?"
Seinfeld
"- How long you think they'll be here? - Don't know."
Seinfeld
"What about the party, the Drake?"
Seinfeld
"- Oh, screw the Drake! - I love the Drake."
Seinfeld
"Let's just take a bus back into the city."
Seinfeld
"I can't leave the car here."
Seinfeld
"- Why not? - It's my father's car."
Seinfeld
"- Let's smash it! - Yeah!"
Seinfeld
"Hey, hey! Leave the car alone!"
Seinfeld
"All right, let's get out of here. We gotta figure something out."
Seinfeld
"Even if we go to the car and they're not there..."
Seinfeld
"...how do we know they're not hiding?"
Seinfeld
"They have to give up some time. They can't stay out there all night."
Seinfeld
"What are we, John Dillinger?"
Seinfeld
"How did this get to be the crime of the century?"
Seinfeld
"What I don't get is, just because the batteries went dead..."
Seinfeld
"...you'd think she'd be able to roll it up the hill with her hands."
Seinfeld
"You'd think."
Seinfeld
"Batteries have gone dead before. Aren't they prepared?"
Seinfeld
"You know, most of them don't even have batteries."
Seinfeld
"Must have been a rich, spoiled handicapped person..."
Seinfeld
"...who didn't want to do any work."
Seinfeld
"Just wanted to sit in her wheelchair and take it easy."
Seinfeld
"- Yeah. - Well, I'm sorry."
Seinfeld
"Our big-screen TV is probably arriving just about now."
Seinfeld
"How we getting out? We need a plan."
Seinfeld
"I got it. We'll give the keys to Elaine."
Seinfeld
"You're a woman. Men won't hit a woman."
Seinfeld
"Oh, they won't?"
Seinfeld
"Not if they don't know you."
Seinfeld
"I'm not going for this. Kramer should go."
Seinfeld
"You know, it was all his idea."
Seinfeld
"No chance in hell."
Seinfeld
"What if we created some sort of diversion?"
Seinfeld
"What if we went over and started screaming:"
Seinfeld
"There's the guy that took the handicapped spot."
Seinfeld
"- That's good. - Let's give it a try."
Seinfeld
"Oh, my God."
Seinfeld
"You know, a lot of these scratches will buff right out."
Seinfeld
"Eight years I had that car, not a scratch on it."
Seinfeld
"Eight years."
Seinfeld
"- Two crack. - Three dot."
Seinfeld
"Beautiful Mercury. I special ordered that bench seat."
Seinfeld
"Dad, this other car cut us off."
Seinfeld
"They had swastikas all over it."
Seinfeld
"They were hurling racial epithets at us."
Seinfeld
"- Three crack. - Four bam."
Seinfeld
"You know, my insurance doesn't even cover this."
Seinfeld
"The whole thing is a total loss."
Seinfeld
"The important thing is he didn't get hurt."
Seinfeld
"No, it isn't."
Seinfeld
"So, what are you doing now, Georgie?"
Seinfeld
"- North. - I'm writing a pilot for NBC."
Seinfeld
"- Where the hell's my paper? - You're writing a pilot?"
Seinfeld
"With his friend Jerry Seinfeld, the comedian."
Seinfeld
"Well, Jerry's car gets hit and the other driver doesn't have any insurance..."
Seinfeld
"...so the judge sentences him to be Jerry's butler."
Seinfeld
"- It's the same situation. - Exactly."
Seinfeld
"Frank, maybe you ought to make him your butler."
Seinfeld
"Flower."
Seinfeld
"And Jerry I used to think was nice."
Seinfeld
"I don't know what happened to him. Nine bam."
Seinfeld
"- One dot. - Two crack."
Seinfeld
"So it was a good party, huh?"
Seinfeld
"You're welcome. You're welcome. They loved the TV. Loved it."
Seinfeld
"Yeah."
Seinfeld
"Drake wants to know if we'll come out to Mineola since we missed the party."
Seinfeld
"Don't worry, I'm taking my car."
Seinfeld
"The Drake is great."
Seinfeld
"I'm glad they're happy, but frankly it doesn't do anything for me."
Seinfeld
"- Yes? - It's me."
Seinfeld
"Come on up."
Seinfeld
"Hey."
Seinfeld
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