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Clips from Seinfeld - The Handicap Spot (S04E04)

"A friend's getting married."
Seinfeld
"...he'll be at a nude bar watching a dancer in the same outfit."
Seinfeld
"That is possible."
Seinfeld
"When I give the order to fall asleep on the sofa with the TV on..."
Seinfeld
"Hey, is it my imagination, or do really good-looking women..."
Seinfeld
"How we getting to Scott Drake's party on Saturday night?"
Seinfeld
"So what? That's easy."
Seinfeld
"Isosceles. You know, I love the name Isosceles."
Seinfeld
"If I had a kid, I would name him Isosceles."
Seinfeld
"Hey, you know what, maybe we should all chip in for the gift."
Seinfeld
"- Yeah. - The chip-in. Definitely."
Seinfeld
"That'll hold the good spot, and we can get the good car."
Seinfeld
"- So, what are we gonna get him? - Anything we want. We're chipping in."
Seinfeld
"I like this area. I could live out here."
Seinfeld
"No, they don't. If they could drive, they wouldn't be handicapped."
Seinfeld
"I got news for you: Handicapped people don't even want to park there."
Seinfeld
"There must have been an accident."
Seinfeld
"Halfway up, her batteries gave out, and she rolled backwards into the wall."
Seinfeld
"Taking up a handicapped spot. He's gonna pay."
Seinfeld
"Well, good luck finding them. Him. Whatever."
Seinfeld
"We're gonna get you, you coward!"
Seinfeld
"It's not like we stuck a broomstick in her spokes and she went flying."
Seinfeld
"- Me? - Yeah."
Seinfeld
"When they run the other direction, we'll jump in the car."
Seinfeld
"If that doesn't work, we'll give them Kramer."
Seinfeld
"- I could have been killed. - I told you not to give it to him."
Seinfeld
"- He's a real troublemaker. - He didn't have anything to do with it."
Seinfeld
"He's all together crazy, that one."
Seinfeld
"- Three bam. - Mahjongg."
Seinfeld
"Wait. I'll ask her. That's a great idea."
Seinfeld
"- Get something to eat. - Sure."
Seinfeld
"Sure. Okay."
Seinfeld
"Okay. All right, we'll see you later. Bye."
Seinfeld
"Yeah. Well, I don't know if I'm happy for them."
Seinfeld
"Wow, what happened?"
Seinfeld
"I love her, Jerry. I mean, I really love her."
Seinfeld
"But some day we'll be driving along..."
Seinfeld
"- Is that what you want? - All right! All right!"
Seinfeld
"I put Stephen Hawking in one of these two months ago, he's loving it."
Seinfeld
"...less expensive?"
Seinfeld
"I'm watching every Super Bowl here. Every big fight."
Seinfeld
"Hey, I am really sorry about this, guys."
Seinfeld
"Hey, Drake, whatever happens, I'm sure it'll be for the best."
Seinfeld
"Yeah. Take it easy. Bye-bye, Allison."
Seinfeld
"Oh, God!"
Seinfeld
"...regardless of the operator's tremors or spasticity."
Seinfeld
"- Well, is it all right if I try it? - Hop in."
Seinfeld
"I tell you..."
Seinfeld
"...when I see someone enjoying themselves like that..."
Seinfeld
"...it reminds me of why I got into this business in the first place."
Seinfeld
"How much?"
Seinfeld
"Boy, I'm really starting to dislike the Drake."
Seinfeld
"We'll get the TV back. Help defray some of the cost of the wheelchair."
Seinfeld
"- Oh, come on. Who's gonna call? - You are."
Seinfeld
"That's my thing."
Seinfeld
"How could anybody be so selfish and inconsiderate."
Seinfeld
"Due to his tireless effort, he has personally raised over $22,000."
Seinfeld
"Reckless endangerment of public safety..."
Seinfeld
"Your father got arrested. For what?"
Seinfeld
"- What's the matter? - It's over."
Seinfeld
"- What's over? - Me and Lola."
Seinfeld
"Not good-looking. Jerry, look at me. Look at my face."
Seinfeld
"Oh, really?"
Seinfeld
"You can't believe your eyes. It's too good to be true."
Seinfeld
"Somehow everybody missed it."
Seinfeld
"They must have to just stack, like, a hundred cars into those two spots."
Seinfeld
"The bachelor party and bridal shower are the same day, so it's conceivable..."
Seinfeld
"...that while she's getting lingerie..."
Seinfeld
"But the difference between single and married..."
Seinfeld
"...is the form of government."
Seinfeld
"You see, when you're single you're the dictator of your own life."
Seinfeld
"I have complete power."
Seinfeld
"...no one can overrule me."
Seinfeld
"When you're married you are part of a vast decision-making body."
Seinfeld
"Before anything's done, there are meetings."
Seinfeld
"Committees have to study the situation."
Seinfeld
"And this is if the marriage works."
Seinfeld
"That's what so painful about divorce:"
Seinfeld
"You've been impeached. You weren't even the president."
Seinfeld
"...walk a lot faster than everybody else?"
Seinfeld
"We don't walk that fast."
Seinfeld
"- No, seriously. - Seriously, we don't."
Seinfeld
"The better-looking they are, the faster they go."
Seinfeld
"I see them on the street zooming around."
Seinfeld
"They're a blur. It's like they got a motor on their ass."
Seinfeld
"Hey, Jerry, come on, let's go. We're gonna miss the previews."
Seinfeld
"What's the big hurry?"
Seinfeld
"Oh, Drake's party. I forgot to buy a present."
Seinfeld
"What, I gotta buy a present now?"
Seinfeld
"Of course you do. It's an engagement party."
Seinfeld
"It never ends, this present stuff."
Seinfeld
"Engagement present. Then they get married."
Seinfeld
"You gotta get them something."
Seinfeld
"Then a baby. Another present."
Seinfeld
"Then the baby starts getting their presents."
Seinfeld
"I don't even like Drake."
Seinfeld
"- Don't like the Drake? - Hate the Drake."
Seinfeld
"- I love the Drake. - How could you not like the Drake?"
Seinfeld
"- Who's the Drake? - Who's the Drake?"
Seinfeld
"The Drake is good."
Seinfeld
"So, what are you gonna get him?"
Seinfeld
"You know, I haven't even met the fiancée."
Seinfeld
"Oh, whatever!"
Seinfeld
"Elaine, look. I drew this triangle freehand."
Seinfeld
"It's a doodle. It's perfect."
Seinfeld
"Easy?"
Seinfeld
"Hi. Hey, have you gotten a present yet for the Drake?"
Seinfeld
"- No, no, not yet. - You like the Drake?"
Seinfeld
"I love the Drake."
Seinfeld
"I'm looking forward to meeting the Drakette."
Seinfeld
"I'm lukewarm about the Drakette."
Seinfeld
"Boy, that's a nice triangle."
Seinfeld
"It's isosceles."
Seinfeld
"Isosceles Kramer."
Seinfeld
"- The chip-in. - Hey, pretty good idea?"
Seinfeld
"Let's go to that mall in Lynbrook before the party."
Seinfeld
"- We'll take your car. It's got room. - No, no. My car's not running."
Seinfeld
"What about your father's car?"
Seinfeld
"No. Out of the question. I was over there today."
Seinfeld
"He's got the good spot in front of the good building."
Seinfeld
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