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Clips from NewsRadio - Xmas Story (S02E02)

"because the one I do like is Jack Benny,"
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"which you would know if you or anybody else in this office"
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"Matthew, I gave you Fibber McGee and Molly."
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"Thirty-two wonderful hours"
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"of crap falling out of a closet."
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"I own the rights to the show."
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"Now I'm giving them to you."
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"Now you own the rights to the show"
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"Yeah. Anyone wants to make a TV show or movie about them,"
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"they got to go through you."
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"What about t-shirts?"
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"greeting cards, foreign rights, pay-per-view,"
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"they all got to go through you."
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"What about commercials?"
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"What were you thinking about?"
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"Fibber McGee and Pepsi."
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"All right! Good."
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"Thank you, Mr. James."
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"Why are you doing this to me?"
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"Good. My name's Sam Belford."
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"I know this is kind of a silly stunt, but uh,"
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"you won't soon be forgetting"
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"the name Sam Belford, am I right?"
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"You did all this to get me to listen to your demo tape?"
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"Yes."
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"So, you'll listen to it?"
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"Sure, I will, kid."
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"Chutzpah?"
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"I'm sorry? Chutzpah."
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"I'm not familiar with that term."
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"You know what I mean."
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"You remind me of a young me."
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"Thank you."
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"Merry Christmas."
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"and then he meets someone like you."
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"I guess that's what Christmas is all about."
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"Amen to that."
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"Bleford."
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"["JINGLE BELLS" PLAYING]"
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"Hello, Mr. McNeal. Sam Belford here."
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"Remember me? Prepare to die!"
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"Ha, ha. Good. Got your attention again, huh?"
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"Because this time, I'm not joking."
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"Well, actually, I just wanted to get 4 quarters to do my laundry."
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"You heard me, Bill McNeal."
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"I hope you're not gonna bring me"
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"I wanna rip off your arms and legs"
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"Well, thank you!"
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"[WHISTLES]"
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"You're welcome, sir."
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"Oh, thank you! Wait. Does that mean I don't get a real present?"
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"get set..."
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"I really hate to have to say this,"
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"Fine. Forget it..."
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"over the names of one of his other companies."
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"but nothing fits better than a dead man's shirt."
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"See, "Dave." That's your name."
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"Huh? I don't know. Let me see."
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"mention it."
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"Merry Christmas!"
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"It was very... very, very--"
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"a sports car."
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"No..."
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"Huh!"
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"[LAUGHS MANIACALLY]"
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"Do I have your complete attention, Bill McNeal?"
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"Check your brakes."
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"[TIRES SCREECHING, HORN HONKING]"
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"LISA: Yep."
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"Come on. These are terrific gifts."
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"but it is the thought that counts."
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"Well, first, let me thank you once again for--"
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"Cathy, the blue one's because that's your favorite color."
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"Which one's mine, mine, mine?"
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"And we all got cars! Wahoo!"
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"Yeah, well, maybe a little bit. Yeah."
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"Oh, well, I was hoping it would never come to this,"
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"Merry Christmas, dead man!"
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"Might I call you "Kris"?"
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"Who put you up to this?"
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"Oh, you bet I do--"
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"Everyone loves the cars."
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"No."
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"Whoa! That was a close one."
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"Matthew!"
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"[MATTHEW LAUGHING]"
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"doesn't mean he doesn't care about you."
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"Well, those are very thoughtful gifts, sir,"
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"With attention deficit disorder."
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"on that Santa Claus for a long time now."
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"Please..."
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"Yes."
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"All right, okay, I'm here. Now, what's so urgent?"
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"Well, I do! I'm really touched."
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"Oh, that's even funnier!"
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"You know what, it kind of makes me wish"
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"Matthew?"
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"Huh? Huh?"
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"[METAL CLINKING]"
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"Hey, somebody starting a pyramid scheme?"
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"Well, I, for one,"
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"You promise not to laugh?"
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"The Santa Claus wants to do what, Bill?"
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"You know what, I'm gonna make this right."
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"Well, thanks, sir."
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"Drive safe. I got to go."
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"You are because you know"
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"Huh."
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"Matthew, I don't think you understand."
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"And now I'd like to present you"
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"Matthew, take it easy, sweetie."
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"That man threatened me with physical violence."
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"Ho, ho, ho! Happy holidays!"
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"[♪]"
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"Way to go, Lisa, Way to go!"
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"Wait a second."
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"shirt in a frame."
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"Oh, that's all right."
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"Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas, sir."
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"of a really cheap, crappy thought."
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