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Clips from The Golden Girls - Love, Rose (S02E02)

"Sophia. Your card game run late?"
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"Honey, if he was your uncle, it wasn't meant to be."
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"They changed the route on the number 10 bus. Didn't put up a sign."
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"Where did you end up?"
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"Who knows? Only one person spoke English,"
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"and he blamed me for the Bay of Pigs."
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"- How did you get home? - On another bus."
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"But they'd changed the name of the number 10 to number 7."
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"I'm gonna write David Horowitz."
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"Sophia, I think you got on the wrong bus."
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"Maybe, but I'm gonna write Horowitz, anyway."
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"I want someone to arrest David Harper's dentist."
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"Rose, I have a date. Do you plan to use your silver bracelet?"
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"I plan to spend the evening reorganizing my recipe file."
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"Are you dressing for that, or can I borrow the bracelet?"
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"- All yours. - Thank you."
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"I'm borrowing your pearl earrings."
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"What if I'm using them?"
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"Honey, I would be so happy for you."
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"But you don't have a date."
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"The only woman who went without"
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"male companionship longer than you was Heather Swain,"
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"who went to the sanatorium for what Reverend Samuels said was the croup,"
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"but which all Mayflower County knew was a social disease."
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"Congratulations, Rose. A new record."
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"And you've done it without needing penicillin."
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"Now, Rose knows I don't mean anything. Don't you? We all have our dry spells."
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"You can borrow the earrings, Blanche. I'm not going anywhere."
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"And keep them till I do need them."
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"Come on, Rose. Don't let this bother you. You'll date again."
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"Of course. Honey, have you given any thought to advertising?"
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"Blanche. I could never dress the way you do."
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"Besides, I have to wear undies."
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"Not all my wool skirts are lined."
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"That's not what I meant."
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"Blanche, do you mean like a personals column?"
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"- Yeah. - That's a great idea."
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"- I don't know. - What do you have to lose?"
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"If you don't find anyone interesting, you don't have to reply."
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"And they'll even run your picture, and let you use a 100-word biography."
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"- How do you know that? - Rumour."
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"I could try it,"
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"but I could never go out with a man I met that way."
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"Honey, desperate times call for desperate measures."
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"Blanche, I'm not the only woman in Miami without a date."
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"Rose, I need to borrow a silk scarf tonight."
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"You have a date?"
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"No, I'm doing the Dance of the Seven Veils, and I'm one short."
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"Sometimes I worry about her."
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"Girls, was this the only mail today?"
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"Yes, People magazine is late again."
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"I have to give that mailman another talking-to."
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"This time, try something a little more forceful"
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"Dorothy, the man had just recovered from a hernia operation,"
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"and he was having trouble carrying his sack."
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"I can't believe the response to my personal ad. It's terrible."
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"- No-one interested? - No. Two weeks, not one letter."
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"Hi, Sophia."
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"Do any of you see a fedora in the window?"
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"- I don't. - Good. I lost him."
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"- Lost who? - A guy who keeps following me."
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"He's English. I met him at the Centre."
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"He's got the hots for me."
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"As much as an English guy can get the hots."
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"Sophia gets chased, and I don't even get a letter."
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"- You can have Willy. - What's wrong with him?"
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"There's nothing wrong with him. OK, so he's 90."
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"He has a tom-turkey profile, and his butt hits his heels."
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"He thinks he can pull it off by wearing a jaunty cap."
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"He sounds kinda cute, Ma. Why are you avoiding him?"
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"There's no magic, Dorothy. No sparks. You know?"
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"He's 90; you're 80. Sparks are dangerous."
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"I know. I wouldn't date a man unless I felt sparks."
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"Well, fortunately, you carry flints in your bra."
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"I can't believe I'm listening to a discussion about Sophia's love life."
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"Hook up with Willy. He needs to forget me."
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"- No, thank you. - You don't know what you're missing."
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"There aren't many guys who remember where they were"
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"when the Archduke Ferdinand was shot."
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"Rose, don't let this personals thing depress you."
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"I can't help it. I haven't been this depressed"
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"since I was rejected by Uncle Sam."
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"It's not like he was your cousin."
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"That relationship might have a future."
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"Tell me, Blanche. Did any of your relatives appear in Deliverance?"
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"It was during the Korean conflict."
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"I was rejected as a WAC."
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"I failed the ink-blot test."
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"Rose, how can you fail an ink-blot test?"
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"I didn't know you couldn't cut them out."
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"I never felt so rejected in my life."
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"Until now."
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"Boy, this personals idea was really a mistake."
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"- Is there something we can do? - We've done enough."
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"I know. I'll set her up with one of my discards, Henry Barnes."
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"He's reasonably good-Iooking; he drives a new Buick Riviera;"
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"and I heard he just opened a third dry-cleaning store."
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"- Blanche, where are you going? - To call him. I'm free tonight."
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"- And Rose? - She can call Bud Needham."
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"Who's he?"
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"He just took Henry's place in my discard pile."
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"So, tell Jackie you'd prefer Marla to do your hair."
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"I can't. Jackie and I go way back, before bouffant."
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"- You're practically family. - I know."
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"So, I'll take Marla, and you take Jackie."
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"But Jackie makes you look like a chicken."
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"But with your nose, it could work."
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"You'll never believe what happened."
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"I got a response from my personal ad."
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"- You're kidding. - And it's the sweetest letter."
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"He apologises for waiting so long to respond."
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"He says he's shy about meeting someone through personals."
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"We have so much in common."
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"We both love all dairy foods,"
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"and we both requested to stand with Bert Parks in Hands Across America."
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"- He sounds very nice. - Will you go out with him?"
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"I couldn't go out with him. That was an experiment."
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"But the letter's so sweet I'm going to write and tell him how I appreciate it."
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"Isn't it nice to see Rose feeling so good about herself?"
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"This is the first time I've seen her smile since all this started."
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