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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Chocolate Milk (S02E02)

"That's not what a vasectomy is."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"If you guys don't get back to work, I'm going to start firing detectives."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"And blanks. Sorry. I just never think of jokes."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Oh, God. No need to be so testes."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Now playing Scrotal Recall."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I just got assigned such a dope stabbing."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Seriously?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"trend my mouth and I can get behind."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"We're a killer team."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Jeffords and Peralta, Jake and Terry,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I mean, I'm the chocolate and you're the milk"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Don't be mad. Just do the case."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Okay. But I have my vasectomy today,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"My neighbor's driving me"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I don't know. I guess I didn't really think of you"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I'm Rachel, I'm... Who's the dinosaur guy?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Ross, bro. Ross."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"So, look, we'll work this thing together"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"The new NYPD commissioner is planning a complete reorganization of the force."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"But first, he'll be sending a Deputy Chief to every precinct"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"to conduct a top to bottom evaluation."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Are we going to be graded or is this"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"just some pass/fail garbage?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Scale of one to five."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"That's how many letter grades there are."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Yeah, they're being weird right now."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Boyle, Diaz, I want the evidence room organized beyond reproach."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Santiago. When I greet the Deputy Chief, I want you there by my side"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"to make a good impression."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"None taken. People love their pets."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"The good news is, our evaluation will be done"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"So, he's kind of like our Grand Captain."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"That's what we call our regulars."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Do you?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Next thing I know,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"the guy stabs me in the back."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Like some kind of psycho wuss."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Yeah. I mean, you don't get into"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"this line of business to make friends."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Really? I would think making chocolate milk"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I don't have proof, but the guy who did this to me"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"is my business partner..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"He's still pissed at me"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"but he wasn't silent."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"He was trying to control everything."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Oh!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Oh! It's so bitter! What's wrong with this chocolate milk?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Dark milk isn't chocolate milk. Huh?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"This is teat-to-mouth raw cow's milk."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Yep, got it. All right. We'll look into this and get back to you."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Okay, Sarge. Hate to be "that kind of a friend,""
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"but let's go chop off that penis."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"but she had to cancel."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It's my ex-wife Eleanor's engagement party."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I can't go alone. I'm worried it might seem a little pathetic."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Yeah, if only you could have gone with your sister."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I mean, it's not like I can avoid them. I live in their basement."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"No. You could go with me."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Can't. I have a date tomorrow night."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Captain, I don't know if this is too much,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"but I got Deputy Chief Brandt this little basket of pears."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"They look ripe and crispy."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Hello, Raymond."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"But if you're here, who's guarding Hades?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Unsurprisingly, I've been promoted above you."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"What happened to Brandt?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"He retired and moved to Charleston to be closer to his grandchildren."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"So much for dying at your desk with a little dignity."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Interesting. I will attempt to cooperate with you"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"under these new circumstances."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I gave it my best shot. Let's begin."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"What? No, of course not."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Of course not."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Jake! The doctors made me into a superhero."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Your friend is so large..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"That you needed a bigger saw to get through his dingus?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"that we didn't have enough anesthesia on hand."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"He needs a much larger dose."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Psst. Psst, Jake. Mmm."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Sometimes, I can't tell my twin baby girls apart, so I call them both "Boo-Boo.""
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"So, he has no filter whatsoever?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I'm going to take you home now, Sarge."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Yes! Thank you, Dr. Penis-off!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Okay. In you go."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Whoo-hoo!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Like a... Hmm, yeah."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Where do you keep your brains?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"All right. Got your PJs on, read you a story,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"checked under the bed for monsters."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"So, here we go. Get in the bed."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Wait. Wait. Wait. You've got to promise me you won't let them give me the operation."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I want to have more kids. I don't want the vasectomy."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Promise me, Tiny Head. Promise me!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Good."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I slept at the Sarge's. It was horrible."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"All right, let's get going and interview that suspect."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I have my make-up vasectomy this afternoon, so..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Last night, you told me you didn't want that."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Then, you fell on top of me and changed the shape of my skeleton forever."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Some things are coming back to me now."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Tiny Head."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I know. He made me promise to not let him get that surgery."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"And it wasn't just the drugs."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"As his friend, it's my job to stop him."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"as you can see here."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I'm off to do some spot checks."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Oh, my God. She's totally going to flunk us."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I haven't gotten an "F" since I failed recess in second grade."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
""Teachers need a break, too, Amy.""
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It's funny. When we first met, we had some good times."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Seems that way, based on what happened."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"which would have fast-tracked my career."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Wuntch offered to write a letter on my behalf, but instead,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"she torpedoed me, because of something that happened"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"the night before she was to turn it in."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Would you care for a drink?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I'd love one."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"to build up the nerve."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I think we both know what I'm about to say."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Raymond, I don't think we need to say anything."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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