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Clips from Scrubs - My Ocardial Infarction (S04E04)

"Janitor."
Scrubs
"That guy that crashed this morning is doing great."
Scrubs
"and figure out what's wrong with Ms Kasuba, seeing as you're her doctor"
Scrubs
"and she's been in the ICU for three days."
Scrubs
"We're running lots of tests."
Scrubs
"Tests? Goodie! What exactly will you be looking for?"
Scrubs
"If it's the slowest doctor in the hospital, then,"
Scrubs
"This is why it doesn't bother me"
Scrubs
"Elliot is so much better with the train wreck codes."
Scrubs
"Her biggest weakness is my biggest strength... Diagnosis."
Scrubs
"You could be my sidekick, Bangs McCoy."
Scrubs
"Lately it seemed like Turk was being a little casual about his diabetes."
Scrubs
"OK, you all know the rules."
Scrubs
"That's right, baby."
Scrubs
"Low and slow, that's his tempo."
Scrubs
"One ninety-four."
Scrubs
"- Give me some. - It's that high, baby?"
Scrubs
"- Gonna name him Gizmo. - That's what we're naming our robot."
Scrubs
"Her pain is central, not near the back. Come on, Bangs."
Scrubs
"How do you think they got there?"
Scrubs
"Somebody probably knocked them over."
Scrubs
"If you're looking for sugar, there's some on the floor."
Scrubs
"It's the classic Todd thong sugar trap."
Scrubs
"Wow."
Scrubs
"Let's apply the same thing to Mrs Kasuba."
Scrubs
"- What else do we know about her? - You know what, J. D? I've got to run."
Scrubs
"- Are you OK here? - Yeah. I got this."
Scrubs
"Don't feel weird because you're threatened by my gift. Many are."
Scrubs
"without adding a delusional sense of grandeur?"
Scrubs
"Because I promise you, you are annoying enough."
Scrubs
"In fact, you're the number one contender for the middleweight annoyance crown."
Scrubs
"...weight for the jealous... weight jealous champ."
Scrubs
"- You were a close second. - I have a couple announcements."
Scrubs
"Yes, the doctor told you to administer Haldol, but why is he prescribing it?"
Scrubs
"Does the patient have a chance of sundowning or psychotic breaks"
Scrubs
"Child, we are swamped."
Scrubs
"When do you think we're gonna get that kind of time?"
Scrubs
"Laverne, if you care, you'll go the extra mile, like my husband. Turk?"
Scrubs
"I'm cutting out that guy's appendix,"
Scrubs
"I'm sewing up her lacerated spleen, and I'm slicing off that dude's foot."
Scrubs
"- Great. Why are you doing those things? - Cos it says so on the charts."
Scrubs
"Can't. I've almost got Mrs Kasuba's condition figured out."
Scrubs
"Hey, I'll join you for a cup of mud."
Scrubs
"Great! Meet me downstairs in five minutes."
Scrubs
"I'll be there. Just let me wash this glue off my hands."
Scrubs
"Can't believe you're on a date with the janitor."
Scrubs
"J.D., it's just coffee. It's not a date."
Scrubs
"I have to go."
Scrubs
"Baby, don't be mad. You know about surgeons."
Scrubs
"We're hammers and our patients are nails,"
Scrubs
"and hammers don't get to know nails."
Scrubs
"They hammer them. Why? Because... hammers."
Scrubs
"For the last time, I'm not gonna call you "The Hammer.""
Scrubs
"I was trying to make a point to my nurses and I needed you to back me up."
Scrubs
"None of the other hammers get to know patients."
Scrubs
"See? When I clap my hands at the same time, it looks totally real."
Scrubs
"I know! Let's go freak out J. D!"
Scrubs
"OK. Fine, I'll try."
Scrubs
"One condition."
Scrubs
"Give me some."
Scrubs
"Oh, my God!"
Scrubs
"I think it, and she does it."
Scrubs
"Who am I kidding? I got my Perry's pager song."
Scrubs
"Mrs Kasuba started on IV. Dextrose and haematin."
Scrubs
"She what?"
Scrubs
"You know what, J. D? I've got to run."
Scrubs
"Are you OK here?"
Scrubs
"There are a lot of things that can knock a guy on his ass..."
Scrubs
"All right, now, before we start,"
Scrubs
"He has diabetes."
Scrubs
"Or realising you've done the most embarrassing thing in your life."
Scrubs
"Stupid Janitor."
Scrubs
"Even that's not as bad as it can get."
Scrubs
"Probably during one of those times you were goofing off."
Scrubs
"Hey, as soon as I step foot in this hospital, I'm all business."
Scrubs
"Sure, she's skinny, but she's thick through the trunk."
Scrubs
"You're at that stage where you and your equally undistinguished colleagues"
Scrubs
"if you know somebody who's better than you,"
Scrubs
"between your legs and go ask her for help."
Scrubs
"Yup. I... Gosh, I'm all out of speeches."
Scrubs
"I don't think I have another one on me."
Scrubs
"Why is my stapler on the floor?"
Scrubs
"- Oh, it was fine. - Honey bear, you look blue."
Scrubs
"No more jacking up my man's blood sugar so you can buy yourself a camper."
Scrubs
"So this is all a big joke to you guys?"
Scrubs
"Cos this is my life and I don't think it's funny."
Scrubs
"Now I gotta try to get back in on that craps game in the basement."
Scrubs
"I don't know. This whole blonde doctor situation has me mortified."
Scrubs
"I gathered the brain trust here to help me figure out a way out of this."
Scrubs
"Uh-oh, bro. There she is."
Scrubs
"Before when we almost had coffee,"
Scrubs
"I feel like I made you feel uncomfortable."
Scrubs
"No. I wasn't..."
Scrubs
"Oh, that's great! What's your band's name?"
Scrubs
"It's Hibbleton."
Scrubs
"Oh, really?"
Scrubs
"How come you were sitting with three corpses playing Texas Hold 'Em?"
Scrubs
"Just call first from now on."
Scrubs
"- It's overwhelming. - Want to know what my big secret is?"
Scrubs
"Just take one deep breath."
Scrubs
"You called yourself Dr Diagnosis and made me your sidekick."
Scrubs
"- why you're being an unbelievable jerk. - You're supposed to struggle, not me."
Scrubs
"Baby, what's going on with you?"
Scrubs
"All because I'm scared to ask myself the questions."
Scrubs
"Is it gonna get worse?"
Scrubs
"Or are our kids gonna have it?"
Scrubs
"That's what they call us in all the diabetic chat rooms."
Scrubs
"There's no need. You win."
Scrubs
"For me."
Scrubs
"I'd like to be able to communicate with animals."
Scrubs
"But right now, oh, boy, we need a miracle."
Scrubs
"Doctor!"
Scrubs
"Dopamine. Run it wide open. Get me an airway. I need a pacing wire."
Scrubs
"I think the second you stop fighting it, time really is on your side..."
Scrubs
"... and you can go on being who you are..."
Scrubs
"... or keep enjoying that little crush of yours."
Scrubs
"To you."
Scrubs
"What do you say we go for the first ever triple giant doctor?"
Scrubs
"I need you to place an IV on the second floor. Room 208."
Scrubs
"No."
Scrubs
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