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Clips from Orville - If the Stars Should Appear (S01E01)

"Unable to penetrate the outer surface."
Orville
"It is composed of an unfamiliar alloy."
Orville
"Who would need a ship that big?"
Orville
"Persian guy, maybe?"
Orville
"is approximately 2,000 years old."
Orville
"If it keeps drifting in this direction, in about six months,"
Orville
"Could be a derelict of some kind."
Orville
"but navigation will need to be precise."
Orville
"I am the only crew member"
Orville
"Well, you don't have to be a dick about it."
Orville
"Explain "dick.""
Orville
"Check your monitor."
Orville
"Ah, I see."
Orville
"It is my understanding"
Orville
"that human males take pride in their sexual organs."
Orville
"- Yes. - Sometimes."
Orville
"You gonna pilot this shuttle?"
Orville
"- Yes, sir. - All right then. Let's go."
Orville
"Bortus, you have the conn."
Orville
"Aye, sir."
Orville
"Have you been experiencing any dizziness, fatigue,"
Orville
"Nah, it's just a sort of general malaise."
Orville
"I've suffered from depression before."
Orville
"You think maybe you're just bored in your job?"
Orville
"I'm the only gelatinous crew member on board."
Orville
"Hey, you ever feel like coming by my quarters"
Orville
"and just getting weird and sloppy some night,"
Orville
"Bortus to Dr. Finn."
Orville
"Please report to the shuttle bay."
Orville
"On my way."
Orville
"Sorry, Yaphit. Duty calls."
Orville
"with just me and the toothpaste."
Orville
"How big would you say that ship is?"
Orville
"I would estimate a cross section of the interior"
Orville
"Whoa."
Orville
"And it's been drifting for 2,000 years."
Orville
"Engaging electromagnetic seal."
Orville
"Scans indicate breathable atmosphere"
Orville
"Let's check it out."
Orville
"This door looks like it hasn't been used in centuries."
Orville
"What is it, Doctor?"
Orville
"from severe trauma to the spinal cord and..."
Orville
"Yes, Commander."
Orville
"I wonder who they are,"
Orville
"why they're out here."
Orville
"If their engines are dead and they're drifting toward a star,"
Orville
"why wouldn't they be transmitting a distress signal?"
Orville
"Maybe it's not functioning either?"
Orville
"I mean, if the ship is that old."
Orville
"We're gonna have to make contact."
Orville
"I mean, what do we say to 'em?"
Orville
""Hi, we live in the trailer across the street."
Orville
"We'll split up."
Orville
"Kelly, you and Alara head to starboard."
Orville
"Claire and Isaac and I will take the port side."
Orville
"Mercer to Orville."
Orville
"It would seem neither the Orville's scanners"
Orville
"nor communications will penetrate the hull."
Orville
"All right, Isaac, head back to the shuttle,"
Orville
"contact the Orville, tell them we're gonna take a look around."
Orville
"We'll check back in three hours."
Orville
"Okay, we'll rendezvous back here"
Orville
"Right."
Orville
"- 1:00 p.m. - 1:00 p.m."
Orville
"Right, sorry, that always screws me up."
Orville
"is to study human behavior for my final report to Kaylon,"
Orville
"I would like to ask a question."
Orville
"Uh, sure, go ahead."
Orville
"When you were married to Commander Grayson,"
Orville
"what was it you failed to do"
Orville
"Oh, you glad you brought him along?"
Orville
"Isaac, honestly, I don't think that's any of your business."
Orville
"No, that's not it. No, just drop it, okay?"
Orville
"I do not understand."
Orville
"Why is the topic of procreation"
Orville
"How do your people procreate?"
Orville
"on our homeworld."
Orville
"No, look, Isaac,"
Orville
"sometimes two humans think they're right for each other,"
Orville
"and no matter how much in love they are,"
Orville
"for whatever reason, it just doesn't work out."
Orville
"and sometimes the other one has sex with a blue alien."
Orville
"Humans are very flawed animals that way."
Orville
"Captain... look."
Orville
"inside the structure."
Orville
"Well, that's not quite the greeting we wanted."
Orville
"Perhaps she fears"
Orville
"you are not sexually adequate."
Orville
"I'm just gonna try again."
Orville
"Hi, I'm Captain Ed Mercer... holy crap!"
Orville
"You are welcome."
Orville
"Ma'am, we're very sorry."
Orville
"Your husband's gonna be okay, he's only stunned."
Orville
"He's only stunned."
Orville
"We'd like to talk to you for a minute if we can."
Orville
"What is that?"
Orville
"and that's Isaac."
Orville
"Our ship encountered your vessel"
Orville
"adrift in space."
Orville
"We know your engines are inoperative,"
Orville
"and you're heading right toward a star."
Orville
"and if that doesn't work, offer evacuation ships."
Orville
"I don't understand."
Orville
"that we don't understand either."
Orville
"We've never seen anything like this place."
Orville
"This is our farm, my husband and I."
Orville
"I gathered that, but this ship..."
Orville
"I don't understand what you're asking."
Orville
"Are you from the Underland?"
Orville
"decent people. We embrace the word of Dorahl."
Orville
"Who's Dorahl?"
Orville
"Get back in your room,"
Orville
"Tomilin, now."
Orville
"I said now!"
Orville
"Tomilin, is it?"
Orville
"We don't mean your family any harm."
Orville
"Well, we did just shoot his dad."
Orville
"Are you real?"
Orville
"Captain,"
Orville
"if I may..."
Orville
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