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Clips from The Cleveland Show - Field of Streams (S01E01)

"What kind of coach are you? No one's born loving baseball, Hot Brown."
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"How could they be? It's dull as dirt."
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"You gotta give your son something from your past to inspire him."
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"Like when my dad let me nail his third wife."
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"He cheered me on from the closet."
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"I know the perfect thing to give Junior."
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"Coach, I don't know how to thank you."
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"I need a place to live and some money."
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"Oh, we all do, coach. We all do."
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"Hey, Daddy. I was just playing truth or dare."
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"And I was dared to climb the bookshelf like a fireman."
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"Fourteen. You're 14."
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"Now, get down here. I got something I want you to have."
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"Wow, number nine."
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"I thought when you left, they retired it for good."
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"I'm Brett Favre-ing it."
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"I want you to join the team and wear my jersey..."
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"...and keep the Brown family legacy alive."
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"Wow!"
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"Larry the Leopard, call for backup, pronto."
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"And Collegiate leading by one."
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"Thanks to a great outing by pitcher Miles Duggan."
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"Duggan's a junior. Only because he was held back this year..."
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"...for what he claims is a "learning disability"..."
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"...called, get this, dyslexia."
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"Ha, ha. Gesundheit."
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"Look, a black baseball player that doesn't speak Spanish."
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"- Rallo, what are you talking about? - That's rare."
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"- Come on, Junior. There you go."
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"That's Cleveland Brown Jr..."
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"...wearing the original jersey his father made famous."
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"After 25 years, Hot Brown Number Nine is back at the plate."
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"Ball two."
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"This type of excitement is what makes the game great."
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"Anything can happen."
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"The next pitch could be a strike, a hit..."
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"Ball three."
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"Hard to say. Here we go."
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"Ball four. He walks slowly."
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"A respectable if underwhelming return to the field..."
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"...for the legendary number nine."
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"Oh, all right."
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"And here's the deaf powerhouse..."
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"Come on. Show me what you got. It's showtime."
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"The plane. The plane. That ball is flying."
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"- Run, Junior. - Run!"
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"Oh, no. Come on, boy!"
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"Ha, ha. Junior stinks."
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"Good space work, son."
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"Looks like number nine is a Hot Brown mess."
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"Brown Number Nine makes you hate the game itself."
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"The Growlers should retire that jersey again."
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"Gordy, we've talked about this. You can't say that on the air."
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"So what? They'll just bleep it. Brown Number Nine sucks shit."
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"Did I tell you about the service call I got this morning?"
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"Some Russian dude tried to hook up his cable box to his oven."
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"- Uh, I mean dumb-ass. - Oh, I get it. "A number nine." Ha, ha."
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"- Did you come up with that yourself? - Uh, no, I heard it somewhere."
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"- Where? - Everywhere."
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"- From who? - Everybody."
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"- When? - All the time."
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"- How? - Derogatorily."
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"That's it. My legacy has been besmirched."
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"And it's time I unbesmirch it."
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"Terry, I'm gonna do something I should have done a long time ago."
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"Oh, God. Oh, this is a gross bathroom."
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"Oh, there's pee on the seat."
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"I don't care. I'll squat."
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"Oh, my legs are too tired. I'll just sit in it."
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"I'll just wipe my butt cheeks off with it."
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"They should have called this the AM/BM."
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"Oh, for Pete's sake. Somebody wrote "Brown Number Nine"..."
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"...on the wall in number two."
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"Oh, this place is gross. What the hell?"
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"I am never eating hot dogs from this place anymore."
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"Actually, I wouldn't mind having a hot dog."
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"Oh, they're out of paper. I better call Terry to bring me some."
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"No signal? This phone sucks."
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"What am I supposed to wipe with?"
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"Oh, please tell me I wore old socks. Yes."
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"Now we're gonna do something else I should have done a long time ago."
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"Oh, no, where's my dad's jersey?"
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"Someone stole my dad's jersey."
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"Oh, no."
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"She's my sister."
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"Cleveland Jr., may I enter?"
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"- Here, it's yours. - Fine."
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"...that's water under the bridge."
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"You're a bad baseball player."
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"I'm proud to be your father."
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"Nobody calls my fat son a chubby loser."
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"Hot Brown."
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"Make baseball your hot Dick Nixon, Cleveland."
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"Retire it to the shit can."
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"To Hot Brown Number Nine."
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"Man, what a number nine."
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"Our man Cleveland Brown is officially a legend."
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"Perhaps you could just, um, reach into my pocket and take the check yourself?"
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"Nerds!"
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"- Who dared you? - Larry the Leopard."
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"Bye, Mrs. Donna."
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"And what is he doing with my jersey?"
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"Coach, I did something you always told me not to do."
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"- Ball one. Little outside. - Good eye."
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"Man, I can't wait for the 1984 Olympics this year."
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"- Yeah! - Yeah!"
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"I told you never to mention that name in this house."
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"Oh, whatever's clever."
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