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Clips from The Simpsons - Loan-a Lisa (S22E22)

"make three percent less than people who do?"
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"Lisa, thanks to you,"
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"and Nobel laureate Mohammad Yunus,"
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"I can do... this!"
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"Spelling, meet F-Y-R-E."
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"Principal Skinner, I need to convince Nelson"
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"to come back to school."
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"Seriously? Why? With Nelson gone,"
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"lunch money's finally making its way to the cafeteria."
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"Nurples are returning to their natural, non-purple hue."
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"Besides, I hear he's doing quite well with his bicycle pimpery."
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"He is. He's paying people $11 an hour to work for him."
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"$11 an hour?"
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"That's night watchman money."
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"Maybe I should have a chat with him."
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"Which of these ties says confidence?"
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"It's a conversation starter!"
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"It's not you I'm trying to impress, it's Nelson."
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"I know he likes the sleeveless look."
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"Skinner!"
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"Oh. Oh, so you also heard about the, uh, $11 an hour."
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"I heard about it first."
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"Yes, well, you see the thing about that is... Blah!"
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"Good afternoon."
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"I'd like to return this merchandise."
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"and other reason please explain.""
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"Sir, this suitcase has an airline tag on it,"
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"these ping-pong balls have been served and volleyed,"
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"and this hot plate's still warm."
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"Yes, uh... maybe I'll just come back"
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"during someone else's shift."
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"Is Claire working today?"
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"She's a real sucker."
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"Let me get my supervisor."
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"Hello, Homer. How do you know my name?"
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"I'm Chris Hansen from To Catch a Credit-Whore."
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"We know you've been returning used items all over town."
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"Oh, it's not what you think..."
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"I came here to warn them-- yes, to-to warn them about, um..."
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"People like you? Yes! I mean no! I mean..."
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"You'll never get me!"
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"I have to sign a release so you can broadcast this, right?"
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"Initial there, and... Never!"
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"Can you tell me when this is gonna be on?"
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"I'm thinking of having a party."
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"Lisa, why did you bring me here?"
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"Oh, I don't know."
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"I thought one of these super-successful people"
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"Why, look. It's Mark Zuckerberg, the founder of Facebook!"
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"Mr. Zuckerberg, I'm Lisa,"
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"and this is Nelson."
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""Mark Zuckerberg is..."
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"That's great, Mr. Zuckerberg,"
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"but I was hoping you could tell us"
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"how education was instrumental to your success."
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"Well, the truth is... I dropped out of Harvard."
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"You did? Better earnin' than learnin'!"
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"Hell, yeah! I'll get the best kind of degree--"
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"honorary, baby!"
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"Well, clearly, you're an exception."
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"Am I, Lisa? Bill Gates-- dropout."
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"Virgin Airlines' Richard Branson-- dropout."
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"I did. Graduated magna cum lade."
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"There, you see?"
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"I'm afraid"
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"I haven't done too well for myself."
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"But I can certainly appreciate the irony of it."
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"So, how did everyone do with their $50?"
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"Well, I learned a valuable lesson"
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"about wanting more than I could afford."
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"Marge, you couldn't have fun"
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"if you were a monkey on a banana boat!"
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"but it didn't go the way I expected."
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"Aw, sweetie, money can't change people."
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"It can just help them be who they are."
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"I gave a bum a dollar once,"
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"and he used it to buy an Ellery Queen mystery."
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"But there was one mystery Ellery Queen couldn't solve--"
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"why a man was named Ellery."
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"But my point is,"
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"whatever I said before I started talking about Ellery Queen."
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"Nelson, I just wanted to say that I realize now"
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"you can't be anyone else other than who you are, and... Huh?"
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"Look, everyone, just chill out!"
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"My Wizard of Oz bike fell apart"
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"in the middle of the Pride parade!"
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"What kind of pride?"
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"I want my money back!"
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"Fine. Here's exactly what you paid me."
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"Thank you!"
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"Oh! Why is this happening?"
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"Uh, this epoxy you've been using is water soluble,"
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"which means it's not weather-resistant."
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"Dumb it down for me."
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"Um... bike... sticky... water go bye-bye?"
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"Some sticky water stay-stay?"
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"All bye-bye."
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"Oh! Hi, Nelson."
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"Maybe I could use a little more school."
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"You can't break us up."
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"We're like a family here."
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"Kearney and I are having brunch on Sunday."
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"If I'm up."
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"Listen, what say we go back to the school?"
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"I'll help you out with a little micro-financing of my own."
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"$50! I can buy paint for the art class,"
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"instead of those crushed-up berries I find in the woods."
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"And Lisa, I've got a little left that I'd like to spend on you."
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"But we're still just friends, right?"
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"Right. Friends."
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"Can I hold your hand... for balance?"
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"Sure... for balance."
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"Sorry."
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"Haw-haw!"
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"Sorry."
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"Oh!"
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"Whoa! Oh!"
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""Mark Zuckerberg is...""
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"- Haw-haw! - Sorry."
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"She needs a microloan."
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