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Clips from South Park - Butters' Very Own Episode (S05E05)

"Yeah, the White Swallow Spa."
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"Yep. He went in there and wrestled with all kinds of guys."
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"He wasn't too good, though."
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"This one black guy had him pinned down for 15 minutes straight."
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"Butters, are you sure about this? You have to be absolutely sure!"
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"Inspector Butters gets all the facts. I even got some neato pictures."
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"The only thing I can't figure out"
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"is why Dad told you he was going shopping for your present"
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"when he was going out seeing movies and wrestling."
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"Did you have a nice trip, Ma? See you next fall."
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"Mom?"
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"Butters"
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"Paint. Must paint."
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"Paint."
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"Wow, honey, you've painted the entire house."
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"Must paint. Everything clean. Everything new."
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"Say, Butters, I'm having real trouble finding an anniversary present for Mom."
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"I can't think of one."
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"Well, then, it looks like I'm going to have to go out shopping again."
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"I'll be back in a little while!"
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"I don't think Daddy's shopping."
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"I think Daddy's going out wrestling again."
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"Paint! Paint!"
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"Must be made clean. New."
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"Hey, a new paintbrush."
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"That's what Dad could get Mom for their anniversary."
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"I've got to go tell him."
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"Never be clean."
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"The only way?"
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"Paint."
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"Butters"
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"- One, please. - Locker 213."
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"Thanks."
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"Dad? Dad, you in here?"
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"Hello? Anybody in here?"
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"- There, do you think that works? - Well, that's four fingers. It's your size."
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"Who is that?"
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"Dad?"
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"Dad!"
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"Are you wrestling in here?"
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"- Dad? - This room's taken."
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"Pardon me, sirs."
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"Dad? No."
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"- Butters! - Hi, Dad."
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"I'm glad I found you."
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"I think I know the perfect anniversary present for Mom."
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"What are you doing with your wiener out, there, Dad?"
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"Butters, you need to leave here right now."
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"You need to get out of here."
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"Go home and wait for me to talk to you."
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"All right, then. Well, see you at home."
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"Oh, Jesus, no. What have I done?"
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"Everyone knows it's Butters"
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"That's me!"
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"Butters! Oh, Butters! Could you come see me in my study real quick?"
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"Hey, Dad."
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"Come here, Son. I want to have a talk with you."
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"Well, sure thing, Dad."
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"Son, I want to talk to you about lying."
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"I know lying is bad, Dad. You told me so."
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"Yes, it sure can be."
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"But there are also times when distorting the truth a little is appropriate."
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"- These are called "little white lies". - Little white lies?"
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"See, sometimes telling a little white lie is okay."
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"Like, for instance,"
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"when you catch your father jacking off in a gay men's bath house."
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"- Who's Jack? - Butters, the point is"
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"why, she might go completely insane."
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"- No, that won't happen, Dad. - It won't? All right, good."
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"No, because I already told Mom and she's fine."
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"You what?"
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"Butters, Mommy wants to take you for a little drive now."
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"A drive? Oh, boy, I love a good drive. Is Dad coming, too?"
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"No, sweetie. Daddy needs to sit and think."
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"All right. See you in a bit, Dad. Oh, boy, a drive!"
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"Jeez, you wouldn't have believed how angry I was"
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"when teacher said I had to share my finger paints,"
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"because I'd been sharing them all along."
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"Butters, you know that Mommy loves you an awful lot, don't you?"
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"Well, sure I do, Mom. I love you, too."
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"And sometimes mommies do things that seem hurtful to their babies,"
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"but it's really for the best."
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"You mean, like the time you washed my mouth out with soap"
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"for saying "nutsack" in front of Grandma."
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"Yeah, I need to behave myself."
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"If a mommy has to end her life,"
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"she can't let her baby alone in the world to be raised by a sick pervert."
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"Well, sure, that makes sense, I suppose. Yeah."
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"Hey, did you see my mittens anywhere? It's cold out here."
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"I'm going to get out of the car now, Butters."
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"I want you to stay put with your seat belt fastened."
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"Well, all right, Mom. Okay, then."
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"You know, I think the car might be moving, Mom."
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"It's okay, baby. Mommy will be with you very soon."
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"Well, I think that..."
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"Yep, it looks like the car is filling up with water."
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"Yeah, I think maybe now might be a good time"
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"to come back inside the car and drive, Mom."
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""Dear bastard husband...""
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"No. "Dear lying son of a bitch"!"
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"No. "Dear ass-face. " Yeah, that's it."
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"- "I will no longer..." - Linda, what are you doing?"
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"Stay away from me, bastard!"
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"- Linda, I know this is very hard. - You don't know anything!"
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"I've been wanting to stop going to those places, Linda,"
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"It just... It started as some curiosity on the Internet."
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"Well, the things they would talk about, Linda, I..."
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"I don't know why I found it exciting, I just did!"
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"And it grew from there and spun out of control, and..."
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"Well, you don't have to worry about your family being in your way any more!"
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"No, Linda. I don't want that lifestyle!"
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"It's just kind of an addiction. I want help, and I'm going to get help."
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"Please, just give me a chance to make this all up to you."
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"- Sure there is! - No!"
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"Our son is dead!"
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"What?"
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"I killed him."
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"I was going to end it all, and everything spun out of control for me."
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"Oh, no. No. No. Jesus, Linda. What were you thinking?"
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"You destroyed my life, you..."
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