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Clips from The Office - Back from Vacation (S03E03)

"JIM: All right, let's get started."
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"For recording."
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"Okay. Karen, any news from that law firm?"
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"Yeah, the deal closed yesterday. It's a six-month commitment."
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"This is sexual harassment, by the way."
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"Oh, my God, he's got a knife!"
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"Dwight Schrute is now wearing a baby's bonnet."
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"That is Animal from the Muppet Babies."
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"I am now chopping off Phyllis' head with a chain saw!"
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"Hey, mon!"
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"Hey."
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"You have a bunch of messages and..."
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"Say it. Ask me."
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"(EXCLAIMS)"
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"It is really good to see you, too."
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"My bonus check was $100 less than you promised."
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"Well, I am just getting settled in."
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"So I'm gonna..."
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"I am not doing a lick more work"
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"You wanna talk about it?"
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"Feelin' hot, hot, hot!"
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"Yeah."
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"Tonight, we are going to have an inventory luau."
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"I want to bring back a little slice of paradise"
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"So, Party Planning Committee, get on it."
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"That's all you need."
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"And settled. Good."
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"There is something I would like to show everybody."
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""No shirt. No shoes. No problem.""
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"But I did see Jan there"
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"Sex. Sex."
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"That whole town is waxed."
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"You got it?"
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"[email protected]..."
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"Uh-oh."
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"He's in the office."
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"Okay."
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"Hi. Hey, man, how's it going?"
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"Uh-uh."
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"Have you sent that out to everyone?"
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"Already sent it to you, my friend."
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"Really?"
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"I have a special assignment for you."
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"Who's the target?"
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"It contains a file. A picture."
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"That's what friends do."
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"It seems from that photo that two of you"
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"Well, this is probably the icebreaker you need."
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"All right. If you're having a relationship"
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"No, no. No, I am not dating Jan."
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"in the most romantic place on Earth."
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"It's Jan on the phone. Oh, God!"
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"An accident? Is somebody hurt?"
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"Mike, you're a rock star, man!"
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"You are the man!"
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"DARRYL: Yeah! Well done!"
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"(MAN WHOOPING) All right. Okay."
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"Apparently, there is an e-mail circulating around"
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"that contains a very PG-13 rated picture of me and a woman."
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"Hey! Hey."
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"Island living, you know."
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"The people in the party, hot, hot, hot"
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"I think you dropped this."
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"There are copies in the bathroom?"
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"I think I owe you one."
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"For talking sense into Halpert."
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"I mean, he was being ridiculous."
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"What?"
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"I was in Scottsdale, visiting my sister."
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"in your office, please."
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"This is neither here nor there."
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"and that for once, I should indulge them."
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"At least, that's what Dr. Perry thinks."
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"But I still..."
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"to be with you."
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"in addition, feel the same feelings"
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"Thank you for taking the time."
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"Hey."
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"and you wanted to go to Hawaii and I wanted to go to Mexico?"
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"What am I gonna do?"
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"Oh, first off, we're supposed to be pushing card stock this week."
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"Also... What is this?"
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"Tape recorder."
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"For what?"
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"Michael is on vacation and he has asked me to record all meetings"
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"Oh, my God! Dwight, what are you doing?"
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"What?"
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"You're not allowed to take off your pants in the middle of the office."
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"I'm not. Dwight, you know what, just back off, okay?"
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"That's making me uncomfortable."
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"I do not have a knife."
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"No. Let the record show that Dwight K. Schrute is now completely nude"
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"and is holding a plastic knife to Stanley's neck?"
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"Let the record show that Jim Halpert is a liar!"
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"I am not."
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"Oh, Jim Carrey just walked in."
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"Dwight, get his autograph for Michael..."
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"Jim Carrey did not just walk in, okay?"
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"Yes, he..."
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"Dwight, what is that on your stomach?"
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"JIM: Oh, my God, Karen, you're right."
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"You can't see my stomach..."
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"(IMITATING CHAIN SAW WHIRRING)"
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"That's nice."
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"Hannah quit while you were gone."
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"I guess she memoed to file some complaints"
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"and so you might also have to be deposed."
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"Relax. Just relax, okay?"
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"Okay."
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"I'll get to all of it later. It's kind of serious."
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"Aren't you going to ask me how Jamaica was?"
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"How was Jamaica? It was so good!"
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"Hey, mon!"
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"At Sandals, Jamaica, when somebody says, "Hey, mon,""
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"everybody says, "Hey, mon," back."
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"Oh, Michael, I'm glad you're here."
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"Stanley. You know what?"
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"Okay, well, payroll is in charge of all of that..."
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"They said I should talk to you."
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"until I get my full bonus check."
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