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Clips from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015) - Kimmy Steps on a Crack! (S03E03)

"Ugh, it's the scurvy talking."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I wish that fancy grocery store would open already."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You shut your mouth!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"that we can't get right here in our neighborhood..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"No, Lillian, if I'm gonna be white, don't make me be Irish."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"That's the worst one."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Hey!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Then what's that stuff that looks like fruit?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Rat babies!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"At what?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Help me, Meemaw."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ We're hungry for your dish ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ I need ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Your food ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ I need ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Your food ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"The gas is on on every one of these burners."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"It's your last chance, Chalker!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And I just need to add the diesel... crust."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"She's insane. Who does the crust last?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"that's a crumble."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Execute. Take her down."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Copy. Moving to breach."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Stand down! All teams, fall back."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Whew."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh, you want to explain to her why she's crying?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"we're sorry."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Have you lost weight? Everyone thinks so."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Send in a saucy gay friend for her to get real with."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Go, go, go."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"What? No!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Gretchen is dangerous."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"She's got kids in there."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You can't treat her different just 'cause she's..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"a woman."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm going back in."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm getting too old for my bed full of stuffed animals."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Ew."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"just 'cause their beef was raised on a farm"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I know it's you, Lillian. I recognize your perfume."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"That smell just happens."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And what are you even doing here, Goodman?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You got, like, 200 of these dumps."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But I visit my stores all the time."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm very hands-on."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Just don't let the wife find out about her, am I right?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So what brings you two here,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"besides the obvious shoplifting?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Just 'cause my clothes aren't as nice"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"as some of these other people doesn't mean I'm a thief."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"That does."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And my Kimmy left,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"and we used to get Channel 6, but now we don't."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Scurvy? Like a British seaman?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Titus needed fresh fruit,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"and we couldn't find any in our neighborhood, okay?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So you happy?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"No, that's why I want to open a store there."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"No access to fruits or vegetables"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"or eggs that come from birds."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Meanwhile, this neighborhood is knee-deep in poosi..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"but in East Dogmouth,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"we can't get decent medical care,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"and our public transportation stinks,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"and our T-shirts have all the wrong Super Bowl winners."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So you agree,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"which is why you should want one of my stores."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"What? No."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Which is why you should want one of my stores."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Run, Lillian!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I need to bathroom."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And there's Mara!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I wonder what shiny thing she's off to snatch there."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Did someone order a hot dish?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"All right, let's eat."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So you found it."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And it came out great, right?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'll make it for you anytime you want."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I just want the recipe."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Why?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Because... tradition."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And proper penmanship is a lost art,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"like drunk driving."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I just want it, okay?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I want it because Russ has it."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"How could Meemaw give it to him instead of me?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"How could anyone give anything to him instead of me?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I mean, I'm sorry, but has he ever beaten you at sex?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Hmm? I win every time."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm the fastest."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But if Meemaw loved Russ more than me,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"what does that make me, hmm?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Worse than Russ?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So, like... two Russes?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"even if the whole family"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"turns its back on me so I'm just looking at butts."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I won't betray Russ."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You actually love my brother?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You're not just a gold digger?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"the recipe and a real marriage with someone who loves him."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I don't even know what that's like."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Hey."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm sure your wife is with you for more than just your money."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I mean, you've got... boats."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"It's like I'm talking, but she's not listening."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Gretchen, we have to talk."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"This must be Kimmy."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"That this didn't work out because you're a woman,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"See, it's not your fault that boys don't learn how to cook"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I mean, have you seen what they did to Strawberry Shortcake?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"More like Slutberry Slutskank."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And it's not your fault the FBI won't come in here"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"That's what I said!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"See, this was never gonna go how you wanted it to."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But getting 'sploded is giving up."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"It was invented by men to avoid dealing with stuff."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Not giving up is the elephant matriarch,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"leading her herd of bulls and calves miles across the baking Serengeti."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"whose matrilineal society relies on older females"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
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