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Clips from Hot in Cleveland - Good Luck Faking the Goiter (S01E01)

"You didn't have Susan Lucci killed, did you?"
Hot in Cleveland
"No. That was just trash talk."
Hot in Cleveland
"The oddest thing just happened."
Hot in Cleveland
"My Agent says that there's this huge Internet rumor..."
Hot in Cleveland
"that I'm dying from some disease called..."
Hot in Cleveland
"Flett-Giordano syndrome."
Hot in Cleveland
"And you're welcome."
Hot in Cleveland
"What? You started the rumor?"
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"Well, now you can beat the dead girl..."
Hot in Cleveland
"at her own game."
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"But-"
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"but you can't just say that I have a disease."
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"I've never even heard of it."
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"Well, no one has. That's the beauty of it."
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"Uh, Victoria Chase."
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"Yes, I'll hold for people magazine."
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"Elka."
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"Will's coming, and we haven't really..."
Hot in Cleveland
"spoken much since the divorce,"
Hot in Cleveland
"and I really wanna reconnect with him."
Hot in Cleveland
"So if you were a 20-year-old boy,"
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"Watch her buy me beer?"
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"Hey, joy. Where you been?"
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"Okay, don't go all Melanie on me,"
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"but I decided to take your suggestion..."
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"Wow. How did it go?"
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"They're all so nosy."
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"my childhood and feelings and sex..."
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"and saying I need to come in four times a week."
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"I mean, who can talk about themselves for that long?"
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"And then at age 12, I decided becoming an actress..."
Hot in Cleveland
"would be the best way to serve humanity."
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"No, no, no, thank you."
Hot in Cleveland
"Elka came up with this Internet rumor..."
Hot in Cleveland
"Well, I'm sure nothing could go wrong with that."
Hot in Cleveland
"Oh. It's a text from my Agent."
Hot in Cleveland
"Entertainment weekly and in style magazine..."
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"both want me."
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"Oh, and, and also,"
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"the Flett-Giordano syndrome foundation..."
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"want to come and meet with me here."
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"Oh, well, this will just legitimize the hell out of it."
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"What kind of disease is it?"
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"You know, I'm, I'm happy to lie to win,"
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"but I-I don't wanna lose my hair or anything."
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"Ah, luckily, this disease hasn't affected my wit."
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"Oh, that's will. My baby's here."
Hot in Cleveland
"Hi, honey!"
Hot in Cleveland
"- Hi, just a sec. - Okay."
Hot in Cleveland
"It's good to see you."
Hot in Cleveland
"- Good to see you, sweetie. - Yeah."
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"The facial hair makes you look a little..."
Hot in Cleveland
"Foreign, but cute."
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"- Both: Hey, will. - Hi."
Hot in Cleveland
"Nice to meet you too."
Hot in Cleveland
"Well, your mom picks up and moves to Cleveland."
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"You must have a million questions."
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"No, I'm good."
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"I fixed up the guest room for you,"
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"but I thought maybe we'd go out to lunch first."
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"I kinda just wanna crash, if that's cool."
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"Sure. Sure. It's cool. Very cool."
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"- I'll find it. - Yeah. You can find it."
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"You're good like that."
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"He can find it."
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"I hope it's your daughter..."
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"who's gonna decide which home to put you in."
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"Getting a chance to talk and catch up..."
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"and shoot the breeze."
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"So how's school?"
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"- Good. - Oh. Yeah?"
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"Well, you certainly have a lot to say..."
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"- What? - Nothing."
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"Sorry, what did you say, mom?"
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"You know, lol. OMG."
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"Om- you know what-g."
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"You know it's not cursing if you say a letter, mom."
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"No, I get it."
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"Okay."
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"Did you know..."
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"The Cleveland spelling?"
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"You went to that?"
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"And how does that make you feel, Melanie?"
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"What?"
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"It's an annoying question, isn't it?"
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"But all the therapists ask it."
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"I've been trying different ones every day."
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"It's a little bit like dating..."
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"except you're not trying to hide how crazy you are."
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"Hello. All."
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"I was just making sure..."
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"'cause the foundation people will be here soon."
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"You mustn't blame yourself."
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"Now I-I did absolutely everything I could..."
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"for both my kids."
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"You've got three children."
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"Ah."
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"Well, it can if you want it to."
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"Everything you want to know about will is right in there."
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"His friends, his music, everything."
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"I can."
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"No, put that down. Someone's texting him."
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"It's from Stephanie."
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""Did you tell your mom yet?"
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"Did she freak?"..."
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"What does he need to tell me?"
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"Well, find out yourself."
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"Pretend you're will and text her back."
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"I shouldn't do that."
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"I need to know what's going on with my son..."
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"by any means possible, right?"
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"Okay."
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"Oh, I shouldn't have done that."
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"I am done with this."
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"Ooh, she texted back."
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""Why are you texting like an old lady?"..."
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"Ah, you shouldn't have spelled everything correctly."
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"Oh."
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""Just tell her we're getting married"?"
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"Oh, my God."
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