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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Old School (S01E01)

"12 if he's turkey tired."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It's trapped. Abort mission."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Oh... Ugh! Abort!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Is the sky just some big blue hat"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I'd love to. It's always nice to meet a fan."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Those guys were the real deal."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"with his own ponytail."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Evil would love that."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Crying?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"And when this is over, I'm gonna find you,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"with a crowbar."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"on which to jump."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Maybe I should roll over there, help out."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and all the clothes were orange and flammable."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Eh, it's not... bartender."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"And lastly,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Oh... my whole body has dry mouth."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It's the perfect place for our second lesson..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"What's wrong with the way I dress?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Yeah."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"No."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Hey, Jake. You've been alive forever."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"How'd you used to cure hangovers?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I had three heart attacks that year"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"who oded in his own pool. Big difference."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"What, that? Naw, it's just some..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"So..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Ah ha ha!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"You can barely even tell it's a chicken embryo."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Ah... ohh!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Relax, kid."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"To be perfectly candid..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Well, thank you for your candor"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Detective Diaz,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Oh, no."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Jake Peralta... Can dance!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Whoo! Whoo!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"And the department. I'll fix it."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"For me, I just imagine I'm slurping up"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"the world's longest piece of linguini."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Every 20 feet of noodle, there's a sauce change."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Great! Now I'm starving!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Well, you said you were going on the record."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Well, maybe you should learn to handle your brown."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Oh, come on. Gah!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"No, you're not."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and shake his hand."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I owe you one, Boyle."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"All right."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Careful!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"You only get one shot at this, Peralta."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Don't worry. I know what I'm doing."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I saw the first 15 minutes of The Hurt Locker."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Hurry! The stench is too much."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"We gotta get those shoes outta here."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Scully ate his pot pie 30 minutes ago,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"so we probably got 10 minutes left on this nap."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"All right, come to papa."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I have an idea..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Let's send these shoes to hell."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Oh, wait."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Yeah, just smells worse than before."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Whoa! Why are you here before me?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Am I asleep? Is this a dream?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I am early because Jimmy Brogan is here today."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Why do you care so much about some old reporter?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Some old reporter?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"that the world wears?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"No. And no one has ever thought that."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"My point exactly."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Jimmy Brogan wrote The Squad"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"about badass New York cops in the '70s."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It's the best book I've ever read,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and I've read 15 books."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"50 books is not a lot. Wait..."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"You said 15?"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"The Squad is what made me decide"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"to become a Detective."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"And it was my first book report."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
""The detectives wiped the mobsters' blood"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"off their boots and found the scag.""
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Scag is heroin, and the book says it's so good,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"you can never stop doing it!"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"See me after class, Jacob."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Fun side note... I late lost my virginity"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"to Mrs. Stratton's daughter."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It was... very fast."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Nice."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and Peralta."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Mr. Brogan, I am a huge fan of your book."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"You can just make it out to "death wish.""
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"That's what everyone calls me,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"'cause I'm always first through the door."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"You go through doors normally,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and everyone calls you pineapples."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"My grandma calls me pineapples,"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"and I regret telling you that."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Those New York cops from the '70s you wrote about"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"were my idols... I mean, Gaminsky, Cavanaugh, Quigg."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I once saw Gaminsky choke a hippy to death"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Illegal. Love that."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Mr. Brogan is writing an article"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"about how Brooklyn detectives have changed"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"in the 35 years since The Squad."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"He'll be observing the two of you"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"on your Internet identity theft case."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"I hope Mr. Brogan's presence doesn't prove to be"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"a distraction to you, Peralta."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Distracted? Me? No, sir."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"But I'm not giving evil the satisfaction."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Not today."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Where's the can? I gotta unload."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
""Unload." Great choice of words."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"It'd be an honor to show you, sir."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"All right. Everyone's here."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Today we're gonna work on our courtroom demeanor."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"Pass. This seminar"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"is not optional, Diaz. You're testifying"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"in an aggravated assault case tomorrow."
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
"The D.A. is worried"
Brooklyn Nine-Nine
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