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Clips from Fleabag - Episode #1.3 (S01E01)

"Why?"
Fleabag
"Sorry, sorry."
Fleabag
"cos mine would never get in the way."
Fleabag
"What? No bang-bang?"
Fleabag
"What?"
Fleabag
"He says he still has that thing on his penis. Sorry."
Fleabag
"I'm..."
Fleabag
"Hi, Harry, it's me."
Fleabag
"and I thought that..."
Fleabag
"Honestly, you could tell him you're going to pop to the loo"
Fleabag
"and then I will come in"
Fleabag
"that she already has."
Fleabag
"She scares me!"
Fleabag
"and everyone wants to be this person."
Fleabag
"I'm not getting anything."
Fleabag
"Yeah, OK."
Fleabag
"OK. OK!"
Fleabag
"You don't."
Fleabag
"Think you're a clever little puss, don't you?"
Fleabag
"And thank you for the text, saucy."
Fleabag
"- Are you OK? - Yeah."
Fleabag
"No, no."
Fleabag
"You should totally get one of those."
Fleabag
"Will your parents be there?"
Fleabag
"Parents adore me."
Fleabag
"Who's that?"
Fleabag
"Well, sir, I'm interested in life,"
Fleabag
"- How did you meet? - I met her on a bus."
Fleabag
"I don't think you have to be alone to be lonely."
Fleabag
"So sweet of you."
Fleabag
"- Was it? - What broke?"
Fleabag
"My wife."
Fleabag
"I think it's probably a bit inappropriate for your guests"
Fleabag
"I'm just going to... Shall I put it somewhere safe?"
Fleabag
"Smooth."
Fleabag
"It's called a Burrower - it basically won't stop until you cum."
Fleabag
"Shall we?"
Fleabag
"What?"
Fleabag
"My sister's got whoppers,"
Fleabag
"Why don't you get her a guinea pig?"
Fleabag
"that she found and told me not to buy. - OK."
Fleabag
"Yes!"
Fleabag
"I'm really sorry, we're really high."
Fleabag
"Then he slept with someone else, and then she..."
Fleabag
"Yep. Never going to get it."
Fleabag
"I was so pleased that you'd found someone else so fast."
Fleabag
"Yeah."
Fleabag
"My God, I love surprises, go on."
Fleabag
"I'm so surprised."
Fleabag
"Such a great gang."
Fleabag
"It was a surprise hit here."
Fleabag
"Aren't we all, girl?"
Fleabag
"Who are you?"
Fleabag
"A door opening, or suspicious dark?"
Fleabag
"Surprise!"
Fleabag
"She used to tell me I was lucky"
Fleabag
"One day when I was temping he asked me to..."
Fleabag
"- She needs it. - No."
Fleabag
"Stop checking, all right, nobody loves you. Help me here."
Fleabag
"That's really rather wonderful."
Fleabag
"No. Stop it."
Fleabag
"Can I eat a water or a sandwich, or something?"
Fleabag
"My God, what are you going to get her?"
Fleabag
"You girls, Jesus."
Fleabag
"I was trying to be sexy."
Fleabag
"What am I going to get Claire?"
Fleabag
"Come on, lighten up."
Fleabag
"- Yes. - Birthday girl..."
Fleabag
"What I really want you to do..."
Fleabag
"Huge."
Fleabag
"- That's him. - Go on."
Fleabag
"God, I'd be lucky. My bottom dropped ages ago."
Fleabag
"No, it's for her sister."
Fleabag
"She's very good."
Fleabag
"All of your desires are wrapped up in here."
Fleabag
"Sorry."
Fleabag
"She had a double mastectomy but never really recovered."
Fleabag
"- The fit one. - The one with the sexy big belly?"
Fleabag
"My neighbour"
Fleabag
"What?"
Fleabag
"Basically it doesn't stop until you've cum."
Fleabag
"- No, no, no. - No, really. - Get down."
Fleabag
"I was, like, Yeah."
Fleabag
"Listen, I know we're broken up, but it's Claire's birthday tonight"
Fleabag