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Clips from Gilmore Girls - Christopher Returns (S01E01)

"He's gonna come and go as he pleases, babe."
Gilmore Girls
"- I know. - No amount of bedding will change that."
Gilmore Girls
"But he's never been to Stars Hollow before."
Gilmore Girls
"I know."
Gilmore Girls
"That means something's gotta be different, right?"
Gilmore Girls
"Why don't you just enjoy the time you've got, okay?"
Gilmore Girls
"Yeah, okay."
Gilmore Girls
"I still think something's different though."
Gilmore Girls
"That is the worst shower I've ever had."
Gilmore Girls
"Water pressure keeps changing every two seconds."
Gilmore Girls
"I'm fixing it tomorrow."
Gilmore Girls
"You stay away from my shower."
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"We ordered Chinese food. It should be here soon."
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"- Good, I'm starving. - Here."
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"How is Diane?"
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"When I met her at Easter, you said she could be the one."
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"The one to be gone by Memorial Day."
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"- You're worse than Mom. - Low blow."
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"- Can't keep a fella happy? - I keep them very happy."
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"- Okay, don't get gross. - You're upsetting us."
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"I'm gonna go study before the food arrives."
Gilmore Girls
"I like to get my weekend homework done by Saturday night..."
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"so then I can do extra-credit stuff on Sunday."
Gilmore Girls
"Don't look at me."
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"She's a great kid."
Gilmore Girls
"I wish I could say I saw more of myself in her..."
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"other than we have similar left earlobes..."
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"but she's all you. Chip off the old perfect block."
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"Why the hell are you here?"
Gilmore Girls
"- Behold the queen of the subtle transition. - Why are you here?"
Gilmore Girls
"You're gonna force me to lawyer up, Officer."
Gilmore Girls
"I've been making changes, especially in my career..."
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"and I've got all my ducks in a row."
Gilmore Girls
"You're opening a shooting gallery."
Gilmore Girls
"- I was tying up the loose ends of my life. - Do they make that much string?"
Gilmore Girls
"So you've been tying up loose ends."
Gilmore Girls
"I don't know what your dad told you..."
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"but I'm on the verge of a big success. It's for real."
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"I've got a company with actual cash flow."
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"He wears a tie and says words like 'fiduciary' and 'ironically. '"
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"- It's for real this time. - I would love to believe it is."
Gilmore Girls
"Why does your dad have more faith in me than you?"
Gilmore Girls
"My father hit his head surfing Rincon a couple of years ago."
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"You're that guy who crashed his new Porsche..."
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"two hours after he got it on his sixteenth birthday."
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"- Horrified. - Think again."
Gilmore Girls
"- All right. Having a blast, then horrified. - Listen to me."
Gilmore Girls
"I am. Your life is back on track, that's great..."
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"and I appreciate you coming here for the very first time..."
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"might I add, to tell us that."
Gilmore Girls
"- I didn't come here just to tell you that. - No?"
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"There's some things I need to do, to take care of."
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"Like?"
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"So I wanna be around more, to be another pal she can depend on."
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"I'm not crazy. I know there's already a life going on here..."
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"But if you give me a chance..."
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"I've always had the door to Rory open for you."
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"- I know. - You've hardly ever used it."
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"I wanna use it now."
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"- Is that okay? - Of course it is."
Gilmore Girls
"Good."
Gilmore Girls
"I forgot to ask you. Tomorrow morning, I'm going to a softball game."
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"- Do you wanna come? - You play softball?"
Gilmore Girls
"No."
Gilmore Girls
"- Dean? - Yeah, it starts at 9:00."
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"Sure, it's a date."
Gilmore Girls
"How did this happen?"
Gilmore Girls
"A single-celled organism crawled out of the primordial ooze..."
Gilmore Girls
"and that pretty much led to Dean."
Gilmore Girls
"I need a beer."
Gilmore Girls
"There's a lot more than an earlobe resemblance there."
Gilmore Girls
"Good. Thanks for the door thing."
Gilmore Girls
"You got the next one, don't worry about it."
Gilmore Girls
"- So, which is your Dean? - That's him over there."
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"- That's Luke. - Luke's the diner guy?"
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"Yes, we eat there practically every day."
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"Looks like we got out Number Three coming to the plate, guys."
Gilmore Girls
"I'd send your boys a little farther into the field, Luke."
Gilmore Girls
"Why? Will they have a better view of you whiffing?"
Gilmore Girls
"The truth of the matter is that you can't pitch and you can't hit."
Gilmore Girls
"So this'll be a terrific matchup."
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"- Knock it off, Kirk. - A historic lack of action."
Gilmore Girls
"Don't you have anything better to do?"
Gilmore Girls
"What can I say, I'm addicted to comedy."
Gilmore Girls
"Half an hour they've been playing, and it's tied zero-zero."
Gilmore Girls
"If you take this show on the road, I've got a name for you."
Gilmore Girls
"Zero and Zero. Dean Zero and Luke Zero, get it?"
Gilmore Girls
"- Doesn't even resemble clever. - I'm dumbing it down for you, Alfalfa."
Gilmore Girls
"- How long do these games last? - Till they get tired."
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"Then they say the first team to get a run wins."
Gilmore Girls
"Yeah, it's really professional down there."
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"Luke, does your husband play softball, too?"
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"All right, that's it."
Gilmore Girls
"Dean, this is my dad. Dad, this is Dean."
Gilmore Girls
"- Nice to meet you. - Same here."
Gilmore Girls
"So, do you live in the area?"
Gilmore Girls
"No, I had some time, so I rode my bike out from Berkeley."
Gilmore Girls
"Really? What do you got?"
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"- A 2000 Indian. - I got an '86 Suzuki."
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"- Nice. - Yeah."
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"Dean, come on!"
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"I gotta go. I'll see you later. It was nice meeting you."
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"- So that was a Dean? - That was a Dean."
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"Next run wins, all right?"
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"Yeah, all right."
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"- Wow! - Wow what?"
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"Wow, I have never seen you two enjoy a pleasant moment together."
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"Come on."
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"You have seen us enjoy a pleasant moment."
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"- No, not ever. - You're being absurd."
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"You have to admit, they are few and far between."
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"Through no fault of mine."
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"I'm just saying it's refreshing. It's not the usual'grr,'that's all."
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"Through no fault of yours? I'm sorry, but you're the one that's so..."
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"I don't know."
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"You do know, or you wouldn't have started saying it."
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"- Just yourself, caustic. - You mean obnoxious?"
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"- Your words, not mine. - Go to hell."
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"I'm just saying it is refreshing to see the two of you just..."
Gilmore Girls
"And no, it's been cold Pop-Tarts for a week."
Gilmore Girls
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