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Clips from How I Met Your Mother - Now We're Even (S07E07)

"My God, you're hot."
How I Met Your Mother
"Wait for it."
How I Met Your Mother
"Here's what we do."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'll make Ted swear not to tell anyone what he knows about you,"
How I Met Your Mother
"and he'll cave immediately."
How I Met Your Mother
"Barney's dating a stripper who's gonna steal all his money!"
How I Met Your Mother
"Next, we invite everyone over."
How I Met Your Mother
"Is it okay if I put out the hummus, bunny face?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- And I'll be the bossy-"
How I Met Your Mother
"No, save it for dessert, idiot."
How I Met Your Mother
"Nice."
How I Met Your Mother
"We're moving in together!"
How I Met Your Mother
"I've got an idea."
How I Met Your Mother
"Let's get your friends Ted and Robin"
How I Met Your Mother
"fighting over my apartment."
How I Met Your Mother
"Wait, what does that have to do with you and me?"
How I Met Your Mother
"I can't handle how hot you are right now."
How I Met Your Mother
"Wait for it. Next,"
How I Met Your Mother
"they'll try to talk me into dumping you."
How I Met Your Mother
"And I'll walk in on it."
How I Met Your Mother
"Then we pretend to break up."
How I Met Your Mother
"And when they crawl back,"
How I Met Your Mother
"begging for forgiveness..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'll be the bigger man and let them off the hook."
How I Met Your Mother
"Or make the monkeys dance for you."
How I Met Your Mother
"God, you're smart!"
How I Met Your Mother
"It's gonna be legen..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm not waiting for it anymore. Mmm..."
How I Met Your Mother
"dary."
How I Met Your Mother
"My God, you two are..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Perfect together."
How I Met Your Mother
"So you're not really moving in?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Well, it started out as a joke,"
How I Met Your Mother
"but the more we talked about it..."
How I Met Your Mother
"The more excited we got."
How I Met Your Mother
"So, yeah, we are."
How I Met Your Mother
"You have anything to say about that?"
How I Met Your Mother
"So happy for you. Congratulations."
How I Met Your Mother
"Thank you."
How I Met Your Mother
"Thank you."
How I Met Your Mother
"You two realize this means"
How I Met Your Mother
"my apartment really is up for grabs, right?"
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm sure I'll find something else."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Me, too. - Yeah."
How I Met Your Mother
"And that's the story of how we met Quinn."
How I Met Your Mother
"That Friday, I met Robin to see how it went at "fire o'clock.""
How I Met Your Mother
"They promoted me to on-air talent."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, my God!"
How I Met Your Mother
"How'd that happen?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Remember New Year's Eve?"
How I Met Your Mother
"When I filled in for Sandy, it turns out"
How I Met Your Mother
"the C.E.O. of World Wide News liked me."
How I Met Your Mother
"He said I have "moxie.""
How I Met Your Mother
"So he's a 1940s gangster?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Apparently."
How I Met Your Mother
"And I got a big raise,"
How I Met Your Mother
"so I'm taking this apartment on Central Park West,"
How I Met Your Mother
"which means..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Quinn's apartment."
How I Met Your Mother
"I already told her you'd take it."
How I Met Your Mother
"Wow. Thanks."
How I Met Your Mother
"Yeah."
How I Met Your Mother
"Hey, and congrats."
How I Met Your Mother
"You deserve it all."
How I Met Your Mother
"You know, I've been thinking about it, and..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I can do normal."
How I Met Your Mother
"To back to normal."
How I Met Your Mother
"To back to normal."
How I Met Your Mother
"Uh... I-I should get going. Yeah."
How I Met Your Mother
"You've got a lot to do. Totally."
How I Met Your Mother
"So... Um, see you soon."
How I Met Your Mother
"See you soon."
How I Met Your Mother
"Yeah."
How I Met Your Mother
"We wouldn't see each other for a long time."
How I Met Your Mother
"But I'll get to that."
How I Met Your Mother
"Listen, um..."
How I Met Your Mother
"about me getting to second base in tenth grade"
How I Met Your Mother
"with Jenna Cristalli..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I don't know what you're talking about."
How I Met Your Mother
"I've already forgotten about that dumb hobag."
How I Met Your Mother
"Yeah, um, it didn't happen while we were watching Peter Pan."
How I Met Your Mother
"It happened while I was playing Peter Pan."
How I Met Your Mother
"That's me in the middle."
How I Met Your Mother
"But then I had my growth spurt."
How I Met Your Mother
"By opening night, I was too big for the flying harness,"
How I Met Your Mother
"and, well..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I fell hands-first right onto Jenna Cristalli."
How I Met Your Mother
"The tissues in her bra saved me two broken wrists."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm sorry. I just, I just wanted"
How I Met Your Mother
"to have one cool sex story that wasn't you."
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay. Next time you tell it, you were in your dad's car,"
How I Met Your Mother
"which you stole to go to a Metallica concert,"
How I Met Your Mother
"and you got to third base with that slut."
How I Met Your Mother
"I was once with this chick..."
How I Met Your Mother
"who is just the best wife ever."
How I Met Your Mother
"Thank you for being so cool about what I do."
How I Met Your Mother
"A lot of guys would be weird or jealous."
How I Met Your Mother
"Are you kidding?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Who am I to judge anyone? I'm the devil!"
How I Met Your Mother
"I mean, if you ever"
How I Met Your Mother
"wanted to stop stripping, I'd support it."
How I Met Your Mother
"- If you wanted... to. - Uh-huh."
How I Met Your Mother
"So, you are jealous?"
How I Met Your Mother
"What? No, no, not at all."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm just saying, if you ever wanted to hang up"
How I Met Your Mother
"the ol' G-string, I'd completely understand."
How I Met Your Mother
"Nah, I like taking my clothes off for money."
How I Met Your Mother
"Great."
How I Met Your Mother
"Let me... let me finish."
How I Met Your Mother
"Hypothetically, what would make you stop?"
How I Met Your Mother
"I would stop stripping if I ever got married."
How I Met Your Mother
"Good night."
How I Met Your Mother
"And then we agreed to "go back to normal.""
How I Met Your Mother
"But I'm starting to wonder if we can ever really just be friends."
How I Met Your Mother
"Anyway, that's the story of me and Robin, 2005 to the present."
How I Met Your Mother
"What do you think?"
How I Met Your Mother
"I think your stories are way too long."
How I Met Your Mother
"I feel bad for his future kids, dude."
How I Met Your Mother
"Hey, my kids are gonna love my stories."
How I Met Your Mother
"just... Okay?"
How I Met Your Mother
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