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Clips from Workaholics - The Strike (S01E01)

"- My dog died."
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"Bring my dog back."
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"- I can't promise anything, but, yes, I guarantee it."
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"- Appreciate it."
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"- And that's my granddaughter Margaret."
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"Also she makes soup."
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"- Wow, that's a riveting story, Jer."
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"- She makes all kinds of soup."
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"Chicken noodle. Uh, beef noodle."
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"Pig's feet soup."
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"She m-fish. Fish soup."
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"Is that your family?"
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"- You could say that."
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"- Your wife is beautiful."
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"- Yeah."
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"- Holmvik. - Yes."
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"- It's time to step it up."
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"I need you mobile."
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"- Whoa. Bluetooth Jawbone Thinker?"
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"With noise-assassin technology'?"
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"- Yeah, that's right."
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"- Big deal."
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"for still being a part of the team."
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"You know, I think you're a regular Derek Jeter,"
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"or some sports shit."
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"- You know, guys, some say that luck"
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"I say luck is for nerds without Bluetooths."
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"- Aha."
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"- We're not gonna take it anymore, guys!"
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"We need to tell corporate to suck it!"
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"Oh, sorry. I thought everybody was gonna do that."
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"- No, we totally should."
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"Suck our dicks!"
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"- Yeah! Suck our dicks!"
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"Suck our dicks!"
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"Suck our dicks!"
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"Suck our dicks!"
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"- Stay here. Get to work."
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"- Suck our dicks!"
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"Suck our dicks!"
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"- Get them out of here."
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"- Suck our dicks!"
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"' GUYS, guys, guys, come on."
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"Just take it back outside right now."
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"back outside."
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"Hell, no! We won't go!"
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"- Get down! You get-"
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"Get down!"
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"- Hell, no! We won't go!"
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"- I'm a martyr! I am a martyr!"
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"- Move! You're going outside!"
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"You're going outside right now!"
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"Suck our dicks!"
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"Suck our dicks!"
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"- Back outside!"
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"- Uh, yes, she is, but can you please hold?"
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"Great. Thank you."
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"Hi, Alice Murphy's office."
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"No, she's not. Can you please hold?"
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"Hi. Alice Murphy's office."
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"Yes, Mr. Benson."
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"Just a moment. Please hold."
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"Hey, Alice, it's Mr. Benson on line one from corporate."
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"- Oh, wonderful."
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"Hey, uh, buddy, why don't you stay on the line"
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"and then you can see how them big dicks swang."
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"- Okay. Swang!"
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"Just a second. I'll put him through."
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"- All right."
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"- Yeah, you can go right through. Okay."
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"- Hello. Hi, Mr. Benson."
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"No, no, no, it's not a real strike."
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"Yeah, because they have no idea what a real strike is."
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"No, this is, um..."
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"this is not about the "do not call" list."
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"Yeah, because they haven't even seen it."
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"Look, half of these people"
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"haven't even graduated high school, okay?"
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"They're barely functioning alcoholics."
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"Yeah, okay. Give my best to Ruth."
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"Okay."
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"Hey, buddy."
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"So, um, just between you and me,"
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"on the hushety hush, right?"
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"- Isn't it kind of illegal"
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"to use the "do not call" list to call people?"
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"- Yeah."
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"Listen, do you or do you not"
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"want to run with the big dogs?"
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"- I want to run with the big dogs."
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"- Yeah, you do."
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"And sometimes when you're a big dog,"
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"Okay?"
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"- Mm-hmm. - We hearing each other?"
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"- Yeah, well, you're not hearing me,"
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"'cause I got a muzzle on."
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"- All right."
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"That's what I like to hear."
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"- Yeah. - Good work."
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"- Zip it, lock it, keep it in my pocket."
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"- Morning, scab."
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"- Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa."
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"I'm sorry, Anders, but Trix are for kids."
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"And union workers."
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"- No, they're the imitation kind"
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"that you brought at Traitor Joe's."
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"What?"
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"- Traitor!"
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"- You know, you could have said Traitor Ders."
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"Been funnier."
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"- What now? Traitor!"
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"You are a traitor! - You're a traitor!"
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"- Ow, dude."
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"- Take a walk. - Dude, my rotator cuff."
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"- Go back to sniffing Alice's ass, dude."
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"Go! And also give us a ride."
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"- We're following you right now."
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"- Thank you. - Stop."
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"- Thanks for the ride, Ders."
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"- Strike! Strike! Strike! Strike!"
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