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Clips from Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021) - We're Selling Washing Machines (S01E01)

"Oh, we're playing limbo now, baby."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"You don't even know how low I can go!"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Welcome to the Dream Team, baby."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Yeah, you get out of here with that turkey."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Leave my carrot!"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Neil's not in there. Geez."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Starting to think I should tie a little bell"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"to all your cardigans."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"This is a new look for you."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"No, it's actually an old look."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I used to have a burger every day after swim practice."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I had to earn it."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"You go swimming today?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Nope, but I earned it."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"And..."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"the second one was only 50¢,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"and I can't pass up a deal, so..."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Mm."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Of course you're the kind of girl who's always cold."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Why are you eating outside?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Um, I'm just stalling."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Kevin's inside. He and Neil got into a fight."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"-They don't do that. -They do now, I guess."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"until Kevin started looking to me"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"to fill the Neil-sized hole."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"As soon as I go in there,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"he's gonna put me to work."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"So, don't do it."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Like that's an option."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"He's just gonna whine until I, like,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"with how you can make nothing to do with you"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"all about you."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Okay."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Well, if I'm so obnoxious,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"why don't you go in there"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"and deal with Kevin's chili hysteria?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Or go home and deal with Neil's."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Go on, Patty. Go be one of the boys."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"You hate them as much as I do."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"-I don't hate them. -Yes, you do."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I knew it."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I knew there was something else going on."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Can you just be cool?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I'm right."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"That's way better."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I'm so glad you're eating healthy with me."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I can't do anything alone."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Glad my company is good for something."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"You're good for more than that."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Got "Ray Donovan" all ready to go."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I'm hooked. Ugh."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"His accent's for shit, though."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Yeah."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"It's true."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Mmm."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Guess how much this salad cost us?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"60¢."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Well, no."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I mean, $2.49, though?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Plus the dressing, which we already had,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"but at a salad bar, we'd be paying 7 bucks each --"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"plus tip and tax."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Maybe by summer, we'll save up enough"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"for our own place on the Cape --"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"show off our skinny arms on the beach."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Yeah, maybe."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Hey, maybe tonight, we could --"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Do you mind if we don't tonight?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Oh, yeah. Of course."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I'm just really tired."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Yeah, you don't have to explain."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"It's -- I'm always happy just sitting here with you."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Yeah. Me, too."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"It's Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Ugh, it's the day of rest."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"'cause they rest on their Lauras."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Rest on their what?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"and you don't want to get out of the bed,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I learn so much being married to you."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I love you, too, babe."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I have to go run an errand,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"but it's for a huge surprise I have planned for ya."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Planned for me? Of course."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Well, last time you said you had something planned for me,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"you and Neil went to Rock 'N' Roll Camp."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Who doesn't like a weekend alone?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Now, I expect you back here this afternoon for your surprise."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Kevin and Allison, together forevah!"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"And I never called before, Terrance."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Isn't it good that I'm out?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I mean, I'm -- I'm selling, right?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"And this is important, so --"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Hell--"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Geez."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Yes?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Um, I was hoping you did walk-ins?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Look, I said Monday, okay?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Why is everybody up my ass this week?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I mean it."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I was hoping you could give me, like,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"a beachy wave or somethin'."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"You say "hoping" a lot."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Well, it's nicer than saying "I want.""
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Just a curl, not a whole wash."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Whee!"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"You got a special occasion you wanna look nice for?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Right."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Well, not really an ex."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"He, um -- We used to bus tables together"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"at this really terrible Mexican restaurant --"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Aunt Chiladas?"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"No, Sloppy José's."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Yeah."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"I guess we never actually, like, "dated.""
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"He was always with this girl from Amherst."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Mm, I hate her."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"Um, I would lock up and he would turn the sign off,"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"and then we would go in back in the kitchen"
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"and fool around."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
"so it didn't seem quite as terrible."
Kevin Can F**k Himself (2021)
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