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Clips from New Girl - Halloween (S02E02)

"- They have the thread count of a paper towel. - I thought they were good."
New Girl
"...I like to eat Chinese people's brains. They're the only ones that are open."
New Girl
"...because I'm going over to Sam's house to mix his batter. Oh, yeah."
New Girl
"[SINGING] Who's that girl?"
New Girl
"- Dr. Sam. - Oh, Ben, what's up?"
New Girl
"- CeCe is American, so... - Thank you for that information, Schmidt."
New Girl
""I got a great new idea for a dessert. Wait a second, what year is it?""
New Girl
"- Like a pile of towels? The number eight? - Schmidt."
New Girl
"Coming to the festivities tomorrow?"
New Girl
"So I say yes."
New Girl
"[COUNTRY AND WESTERN BALLAD PLAYING ON RADIO]"
New Girl
"- Yeah, Amelia's in there. High five for sluts. - Yeah."
New Girl
"- Sound logic. - I know."
New Girl
"- What are you doing? - Oh! No, it's cool, it's cool."
New Girl
"MAN [OVER SPEAKER]: Scream..."
New Girl
"Don't be scared, Nick. You're a grown man. It's just a haunted house."
New Girl
"I totally lost track of time."
New Girl
"MAN [OVER SPEAKER]: Watch your step. Ha, ha, ha!"
New Girl
"Just a recording. I'm good. I'm good."
New Girl
"[ALL SCREAM]"
New Girl
"[BOTH SCREAMING]"
New Girl
"[CLOWN LAUGHS]"
New Girl
"Don't see the Queen of England with British people stapled to a cape."
New Girl
"Ooh, you made me so mad, my moustache is coming off."
New Girl
"Why aren't we having sex?"
New Girl
"NICK [WHISPERS]: Jess."
New Girl
"[CHUCKLES]"
New Girl
"This is my nightmare!"
New Girl
"I didn't punch a girl. I punched a horrifying monster."
New Girl
"It just wasn't what I thought."
New Girl
"[BOTH GRUNT]"
New Girl
"- How sweet of you. - Oh. Thank you."
New Girl
"You are so awesome. Give me five."
New Girl
"...but I witnessed the emancipation of one black guy tonight."
New Girl
"...telling you I had a family tragedy? How many grandparents did you think I had?"
New Girl
"- I had a bad bag of moves, lady. - Well, they're not bad anymore, Nick Miller."
New Girl
"NICK: Ah-ha..."
New Girl
"[BOTH LAUGH]"
New Girl
"That is for real."
New Girl
"There's more where that came from."
New Girl
"NICK: Uh-oh!"
New Girl
"Oh, that's good stuff. That is good."
New Girl
"NICK [WHISPERS]: Hi. - [WHISPERS] Hi. Sam's in there."
New Girl
"Hey, I think I might like Sam."
New Girl
"[IN NORMAL VOICE] I thought the thing was you didn't like him."
New Girl
"I know. But then, ahh..."
New Girl
"- Hey. - Hi, you must be Amelia. I'm Jess."
New Girl
"- Yeah. - Yeah, it finally happened."
New Girl
"It's crazy. Nick and Amelia, together."
New Girl
"- Together, yeah. Together, yeah. - Together."
New Girl
"Yeah, good. Okay."
New Girl
"- All right, call me tonight? - Tonight's the last night of this haunted house."
New Girl
"Here's a crazy idea. What if you came?"
New Girl
"Well, I don't really do, you know, the costume thing."
New Girl
"I'm gonna be dressed up. You should dress up too."
New Girl
"Because it would be cool. For me."
New Girl
"Okay, I'll try to make it, darling."
New Girl
"[BOTH GIGGLING]"
New Girl
"- Well, I wish I hadn't have seen that. - You wish you hadn't seen that?"
New Girl
"- I wish I hadn't seen: - Fair point."
New Girl
"What if tonight's a test? If he shows up wearing a costume, he likes me."
New Girl
"Jess, I was... Jess, I was kidding."
New Girl
"SCHMIDT: How do the boots feel? - They feel fantastic."
New Girl
"There's more where that came from. I got a lot of boots."
New Girl
"Whoo! Look here. One of my brothers in blue. That gun looks real. Let me see..."
New Girl
"- L.A.P.D. Stand down. Stand down. - I'm standing, I'm standing. Look at that."
New Girl
"[WINSTON WHIMPERING]"
New Girl
"Butch it up, Axel Foley. Shelby's coming."
New Girl
"Yeah."
New Girl
"SHELBY: Hey."
New Girl
"Hey. What? What are you?"
New Girl
"I'm reigning cats and dogs."
New Girl
"Get it? "Reigning"? Cats and dogs?"
New Girl
"Those stuffed animals are gonna look good on the floor of my bedroom."
New Girl
"- Hey, guys. Hey, Robby. - Hey, Schmidt."
New Girl
"I get it. The guy who shot John Lennon dressed as a Ninja Turtle."
New Girl
"- No. - CeCe, you're an angel, as always."
New Girl
"Get off my horse, Schmidt."
New Girl
"Hey, Lincoln, right? That's awesome. I was thinking about Lincoln today."
New Girl
"- Yeah, Robby. We all were. - This is funny."
New Girl
"The two of you together on that horse, you look like a bride and groom."
New Girl
"I will throw you off of this horse with my bare hands. I will."
New Girl
"I'm gonna tell him how I feel tonight."
New Girl
"- You are? - I think so."
New Girl
"Boo! Ha, ha, ha!"
New Girl
"- What did you carve here? - It's a secret. Not done yet."
New Girl
"[BOTH LAUGHING]"
New Girl
"What's wrong with me? I wanted this for so long with her, and now..."
New Girl
"- It's just too much, you know? - Mm-hm."
New Girl
"You know why I don't like haunted houses? Because they're just like relationships."
New Girl
"You walk in all confident."
New Girl
"Once you get in, it's not what you thought it was gonna be, and it's scary."
New Girl
"Nick, you've liked her for a long time."
New Girl
"Go in the "haunted house." I'm gonna go in the "haunted house.""
New Girl
"Ta-da! That's me, that's you, and that's our dog."
New Girl
"I look so scared."
New Girl
"Bride and groom?"
New Girl
"No. No, I'm here with the Ninja Turtle."
New Girl
"Bride and Ninja Turtle."
New Girl
"- I don't get it. - I don't get it either."
New Girl
"- It's like she lost a bet or something. - What is wrong with you? Seriously."
New Girl
"- It's okay, CeCe. - No, it's not okay."
New Girl
"You need to go home and change, Schmidt."
New Girl
"I know you have more costumes in your closet."
New Girl
"Those costumes are for Purim. Purim's in March."
New Girl
"I don't care. You're doing this intentionally to mess with me."
New Girl
"All right, calm down. Everybody just..."
New Girl
"Calm down. All right, Schmidt, let's take a walk."
New Girl
"Let's take a walk."
New Girl
"Let's just cut the crap, okay?"
New Girl
"I know you think I'm dumb."
New Girl
"And you can hit on CeCe and make fun of me all day long..."
New Girl
"...but I'm not going anywhere, all right?"
New Girl
"- You're a big guy, you know that? - Yeah."
New Girl
"- Luckily I've got a stone forehead. - What?"
New Girl
"- I'm sorry. - No, it's cool, man."
New Girl
"- You tried to head-butt me, I had to stop you. - I gotcha."
New Girl
"- Damn it! - You did it again."
New Girl
"- How do you see that coming every time? - You make a little wind-up thing."
New Girl
"- Hit my forehead. - You tried to head-butt me..."
New Girl
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