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Clips from Gilmore Girls - It Should've Been Lorelai (S02E02)

"Now you're just trying to shut me up."
Gilmore Girls
"- Oh, my God. - What?"
Gilmore Girls
"Look."
Gilmore Girls
"Empty."
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"Just one of those weird lulls. Happens occasionally."
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"- Can we sit wherever we like? - Wherever you like."
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"- Luxury I never dreamed of. - Where do you want to sit?"
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"How about this table with its unobstructed westward view..."
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"of the wide cosmopolitan expanse of Clump Street?"
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"Tempting. Do you know that on a clear day..."
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"you can see the garbage cans behind Al's Pancake World?"
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"Or we could sit in the corner, the mafia table..."
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"so that no one can come up behind you and whack you with a cannoli."
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"Whack you with a cannoli? Because he left the gun and took the cannoli."
Gilmore Girls
"Let's sit at the counter."
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"No, those are not the power seats."
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"But with no one here, we can sit at either end and play bagel hockey."
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"- Bagel hockey. - Just sit at a table."
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"You're awfully rude for a guy who only has two paying customers."
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"Okay, 3:30 on Friday: My debate at Chilton, write it down."
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"- Already written. - Good."
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"- You prepared? - Please. Paris has us beyond prepared."
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"I know more about doctor-assisted suicide than I care to."
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"Cheery topic."
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"Luke's."
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"Hold on a second. It's for you."
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"- What? - But who knows we're here?"
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"- This morning has been Twilight Zone-y. - Or Outer Limits-y."
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"- What? - Great show, just as eerie, same era..."
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"but no one ever references it."
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"- Hello? - Rory?"
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"Lane? How did you know I was here?"
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"Telescope. I've got a clean shot at Luke's. I saw you and your mom go in."
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"- Watch it. - Yeah, duck, Harvey."
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"Are you still grounded over that whole Henry thing?"
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"Are you kidding? The mother of all groundings."
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"Mom's done everything but slap a Dr. Dre ankle bracelet on me."
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"- I'm not even going to school. - Isn't that illegal?"
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"She talked my teachers into me being home-schooled for two weeks."
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"The words 'highly contagious' were bandied about."
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"Unlimited time to call the Psalm-A-Day Line."
Gilmore Girls
"A big rip-off because Psalm 79 has been on there for three days."
Gilmore Girls
"That's not in keeping with what their name implies..."
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"which is a new Psalm every day..."
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"not the same tired one from the previous days."
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"Never heard anyone get so riled up about psalms before."
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"My world has become very small."
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"Okay, I'm dying for news. Give me some headlines."
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"I've got a debate coming up..."
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"and Dean's been working extra hours lately..."
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"saving up for a new motorcycle, so I hardly see him."
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"Mom and I haven't done laundry in three weeks..."
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"but I've begun jumping into the huge pile of dirty clothes..."
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"as we play our Reader's Digest World's Famous Polkas CD."
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"We got it used for 99 cents. Sorry if that's boring."
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"You kidding? That's the most stimulation I've got in a week."
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"Lane, come down for your snack."
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"It's tea-and-melba-toast time. Gotta go."
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"- Don't forget me in my solitude. - Never."
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"Bye."
Gilmore Girls
"Think fast."
Gilmore Girls
"Impressive."
Gilmore Girls
"- Goalie for the bagel-hockey team. - And bump Schmitty?"
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"Schmitty's over the hill. Put him in Cooperstown."
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"Suit up, kid."
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"Call me if anyone sane walks in."
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"- There's nothing on. - There's always something on."
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"Struck gold."
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"- Not the two fat ladies again. - Why not? They're brilliant."
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"- It's a cooking show and you don't cook. - That might change."
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"- Not a chance. - Probably not."
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"We've seen all of them five times. They're all repeats."
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"- Really? Which one? - The fat one."
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"Come on. The one on the motorcycle or the one in the sidecar?"
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"See? It's fun just talking about the two fat ladies."
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"Can't we find other really fat people to watch?"
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"That sounded really insensitive."
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"Paris."
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"- Can I come in? - I guess."
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"You couldn't be wondering what I'm doing here."
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"- I couldn't? - The debate's Friday."
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"- We need more preparation. - More preparation?"
Gilmore Girls
"No two people know more about assisted suicide than the two of us."
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"Kevorkian called today for a few tips."
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"There's issues of presentation that need to be addressed."
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"- Presentation? - I was listening to the CD and cassettes..."
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"I made of our mock debates and I realized that you were not talking fast enough."
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"- WPM? - 'Words per minute. '"
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"- Of course. - That's slow."
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"- That's not slow. - It's Jimmy Bob slow."
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"- I talk normally. - For the average Willie Nelson roadie..."
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"not for a winning debate member."
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"As a comparison, I speak an average of 178 WPM."
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"Word speed isn't everything."
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"Sometimes I will add a dramatic pause to prove a point, undercutting my WPM."
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"Let's not harbor any Pinteresque fantasies. We'll have scant minutes to argue..."
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"and we have to maximize our collective WPM."
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"Okay. Let's just get going."
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"- Paris, were we expecting you? - You should have been."
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"I'm going to get set up."
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"I'm going to my room to work on my WPM."
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"- Do I wanna know? - No."
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"I'll get it!"
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"- Hello? - It's Chris."
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"- How's it going? - Good."
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"I'm on a business trip here, and I thought I'd check in on Rory."
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"She went to a biker party a few days ago and never came back."
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"- Again? - We gotta start disciplining that girl."
Gilmore Girls
"Who's got the time?"
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"She's right here. I'll pass you to her. Where did this business trip take you?"
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"Your neck of the woods: The Litchfield area."
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"Really? How long?"
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"A couple of days, or for as long as it takes for them to succumb to my infinite charm."
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"If you're still here on Friday..."
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"you should come on down and see Rory in a debate at Chilton."
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"- Really? - Yeah, it starts at 3:30."
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"First come, first served. They're expecting 20,000 people..."
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"- so I'd get there early. - Chilton up close?"
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"It's your chance to see the famous Paris in action."
Gilmore Girls
"- There might even be casualties. - Okay, tell Rory I'll be there."
Gilmore Girls
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