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Clips from Archer (2009) - Animation (S05E05)

"Oh, you were serious?"
Archer (2009)
"The whatever we are, Gang Who Couldn't Sell Coke Straight,"
Archer (2009)
"- doesn't even have cable. - But what about"
Archer (2009)
"- all these? - They're all aimed"
Archer (2009)
"- inside the house. - Well, what the hell"
Archer (2009)
"- good is that for?! - Eh, I'm making"
Archer (2009)
"about two grand a month on the Gilfcam."
Archer (2009)
"- Ew! - The what cam?"
Archer (2009)
""What is your...""
Archer (2009)
"Hmm. Dear Gilf Hound 69..."
Archer (2009)
"Jesus Christ. Thanks for the concussion,"
Archer (2009)
"dicks. Well?"
Archer (2009)
"- Len Koenecke died. - Who?"
Archer (2009)
""Who." Typical."
Archer (2009)
"Goddamn it, will you slow the shit down?!"
Archer (2009)
"a question?"
Archer (2009)
"So, if you'll hide your vaginas, it's time to gather some intel."
Archer (2009)
"Intel? No, do not compare what we"
Archer (2009)
"- do now to intelligence work. - Don't worry, I won't!"
Archer (2009)
"Because selling cocaine to cocaine dealers doesn't really"
Archer (2009)
"compare to helping overthrow democratically elected"
Archer (2009)
"governments! Like the U.S. did in Guatemala,"
Archer (2009)
"Chile, Nicaragua, uh... Oh! Iran?!"
Archer (2009)
"Because-- spoiler alert-- those didn't really work out so great!"
Archer (2009)
"I... Wow, it seems like you've actually given this"
Archer (2009)
"- some thought. - Plus, I mean, it's not"
Archer (2009)
"like we're selling cocaine to little kids."
Archer (2009)
"We blew up an oil pipeline."
Archer (2009)
"that, this is kind of a victimless crime."
Archer (2009)
"If it even is a crime. I mean, is it?"
Archer (2009)
"And I'm excellent in the field, so..."
Archer (2009)
"I just feel like such a tourist."
Archer (2009)
"- I... - And how did you know"
Archer (2009)
"where they were? I thought you couldn't"
Archer (2009)
"- track them. - Ray posted a"
Archer (2009)
"Snacklesnap. It's where you take artsy photos"
Archer (2009)
"of your food and share it with people."
Archer (2009)
"Look, here's some cocaine puddin; here's some more"
Archer (2009)
"cocaine puddin. Ooh, cocaine puddin."
Archer (2009)
"- food? - Well, no, they"
Archer (2009)
"- don't. - Yeah, everybody hates"
Archer (2009)
"- it. - ♪ Mmm,"
Archer (2009)
"- to Colombia? - I assume as a sample?"
Archer (2009)
"To show some cartel boss that our product is high-quality and"
Archer (2009)
"- already in the States? - Saving them the"
Archer (2009)
"transport cost. But those three waltzing around"
Archer (2009)
"Colombia with millions of dollars of cocaine?!"
Archer (2009)
"My God, they could already be dead!"
Archer (2009)
"Oh, Malory, come on. This is Archer, okay?"
Archer (2009)
"- He can take care of himself. - Yeah, and I doubt"
Archer (2009)
"- they were actually waltzing. - I'm sure they're"
Archer (2009)
"- totally fine. - Archer!"
Archer (2009)
"Woooohoohoohoooo!!"
Archer (2009)
"- $50. - Still, though."
Archer (2009)
"¿Dijiste cocaína? ¿La quieres?"
Archer (2009)
"No, gracias. Yo tengo mucha cocaína."
Archer (2009)
"Hijo de puta."
Archer (2009)
"You look for the Godmother?"
Archer (2009)
"- Do you know her or... - No, but I can"
Archer (2009)
"Pinche gringo."
Archer (2009)
"Made a connection, Cyril."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, my God. Although, now that you mention"
Archer (2009)
"it... I think I actually may"
Archer (2009)
"- God. - Snake poisoning."
Archer (2009)
"Placet moveri, iudices."
Archer (2009)
"Shh! Shut up. I think I heard a troop truck"
Archer (2009)
"Shit. It's not the army."
Archer (2009)
"We're not that lucky. They're paramilitarios."
Archer (2009)
"And to be honest, having second thoughts about it."
Archer (2009)
"Serious shit, come on."
Archer (2009)
"Who are these paramilitarios?"
Archer (2009)
"- kidnapping and murder. - That does."
Archer (2009)
"Moot point, though, really, if you're an American"
Archer (2009)
"- made a connection. - Now, really?"
Archer (2009)
"- Well... - Shut up."
Archer (2009)
"Don't turn it on. Do not touch the brake pedal."
Archer (2009)
"Cyril, I'm gonna take out the guard; you're gonna take the"
Archer (2009)
"¡Se fueron!"
Archer (2009)
"Ay. ¿Qué tiene adentro, hebillas?"
Archer (2009)
"So, funny story."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, I'm sorry, Ray. By "hammer," I meant"
Archer (2009)
"packed the engine compartment full of cocaine."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, right. Uh, we should get that out."
Archer (2009)
"sit here and wait for those guys to drive up and murder us."
Archer (2009)
"Ray, they're not driving anywhere without a"
Archer (2009)
"distributor cap, so..."
Archer (2009)
"Whew, man, Cyril, you had me worried."
Archer (2009)
"I-I did? - Yeah, see, I always"
Archer (2009)
"worried I would die without knowing how it felt to get my"
Archer (2009)
"throat slashed and my tongue yanked out through the gaping hole."
Archer (2009)
"and "gaping hole" are kind of begging for it."
Archer (2009)
"Gaping hole."
Archer (2009)
"- Drop your weapon! - Drop your weapons."
Archer (2009)
"- Okay, uno, dos... - ¡No dispare!"
Archer (2009)
"I told you, all about the machismo."
Archer (2009)
"- Archer? - Sí, Ramon, Archer"
Archer (2009)
"What?! Oh."
Archer (2009)
"Soy La Madrina. And I think you have been"
Archer (2009)
"- looking for me, no? - Only my whole life."
Archer (2009)
"- ¿Qué miras?! - ¡Vámonos!"
Archer (2009)
"- ¡Vámonos! - And you, guapo,"
Archer (2009)
"- you follow me. - Oh, yeah, uh, about"
Archer (2009)
"- that... - So, I have a question."
Archer (2009)
"and being dragged off to God knows what terrible fate..."
Archer (2009)
""Putting pressure on him.""
Archer (2009)
"If anything, I've been too lax, but please, let me benefit from"
Archer (2009)
"your vast experience as a mother and..."
Archer (2009)
"- Give it h... - Give... Ray, give"
Archer (2009)
"The mailbox of..."
Archer (2009)
"...is full."
Archer (2009)
"If you're satisfied with your voice mail greeting,"
Archer (2009)
"- How did you...? - You remember that day"
Archer (2009)
"- living room in your wheelchair? - Yes."
Archer (2009)
"mixed it, called my phone and left it as a message, stole your"
Archer (2009)
"phone, got into the voice mail settings, called your phone from"
Archer (2009)
"your phone back. Which I think is why it sounds"
Archer (2009)
"- The... - Shut up, we're here."
Archer (2009)
"Well, I have to admit, Mr. Archer, your proposal"
Archer (2009)
"- is very... surprising. - Not as surprising as"
Archer (2009)
"Really."
Archer (2009)
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