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Clips from Dr. Ken - Ken's Banquet Snub (S02E02)

"I can't answer that."
Dr. Ken
"and the Event Committee still hasn't called"
Dr. Ken
"You know, I'm gonna check"
Dr. Ken
"I've hosted five years running,"
Dr. Ken
"Yeah, and you're still talking about it."
Dr. Ken
"None, unless it's ready to change."
Dr. Ken
"That's just a little taste"
Dr. Ken
"of what you'll be getting when I host the banquet."
Dr. Ken
"They asked you to host the banquet?"
Dr. Ken
"more thinking man's comedy"
Dr. Ken
"Did you guys know about this?"
Dr. Ken
"A little bit, we did."
Dr. Ken
"I like a little crazy to break up my work day."
Dr. Ken
"And I'll actually be able to enjoy the banquet for once."
Dr. Ken
"You never get to eat when you emcee."
Dr. Ken
"Have a great morning."
Dr. Ken
"Why would they ask Pat to host?"
Dr. Ken
"You don't ask Mark Zuckerberg to step down"
Dr. Ken
"to give someone else a turn."
Dr. Ken
"That's like saying I'm the smartest guy at my gym."
Dr. Ken
"When did you join a gym?"
Dr. Ken
"The point is..."
Dr. Ken
"Instead of stewing and brooding,"
Dr. Ken
"I am?"
Dr. Ken
"But it's the only kind of garbage gig Pat can get."
Dr. Ken
"Emily? She likes me."
Dr. Ken
"How long does she just stand there?"
Dr. Ken
"I don't like to put labels on things."
Dr. Ken
"Aah! She's still here?"
Dr. Ken
"And don't come back!"
Dr. Ken
"to come home and eat leftovers out of a damn doggy ba..."
Dr. Ken
"Excu... 'scuse me, 'scuse me? What you call me?"
Dr. Ken
"Speaking of Eric..."
Dr. Ken
"Oh, uh, Connor is coming, too."
Dr. Ken
"Okay. So, are you bringing anyone, Pat?"
Dr. Ken
"Would it?"
Dr. Ken
"No. No, I'm just heading to the liquor store."
Dr. Ken
"to the new Ears, Noses, and Throats guy."
Dr. Ken
"I'm sorry, too."
Dr. Ken
"Find the nearest liquor store."
Dr. Ken
"Liquor... store!"
Dr. Ken
"Mr. Dr. Gary!"
Dr. Ken
"Why wouldn't I?"
Dr. Ken
"I feel terrible because I backed into your boy toy."
Dr. Ken
"You did... you did what?"
Dr. Ken
"and... oh, and... here."
Dr. Ken
"Well, well, well."
Dr. Ken
"over my hosting the banquet, no."
Dr. Ken
"Damona, you believe me, don't you?"
Dr. Ken
"Oh, Juan-Julio. You were there."
Dr. Ken
"Oh, wait, is that that Groupon you were telling me about?"
Dr. Ken
"Just show the tape already!"
Dr. Ken
"No! I was taking the high road!"
Dr. Ken
"I turn on sprinklers."
Dr. Ken
"maybe she was more than just a stalker."
Dr. Ken
"I mean, it's a little weird,"
Dr. Ken
"but you do a lot of weird things,"
Dr. Ken
"Warren Buffett does it."
Dr. Ken
"It is crazy."
Dr. Ken
"She was standing in sprinklers for a good 10 minutes!"
Dr. Ken
"But most of us opted not to dress for a damn rodeo!"
Dr. Ken
"I'm gonna find someone who appreciates me"
Dr. Ken
"It's so much fun."
Dr. Ken
"It's just you, me, Connor, and the Yokel."
Dr. Ken
"What? No."
Dr. Ken
"Yeah, I'll come to you."
Dr. Ken
"I mean, Connor is over there"
Dr. Ken
"What, you and Connor never fight?"
Dr. Ken
"Of course not."
Dr. Ken
"Kind of makes me okay with the idea of dying alone."
Dr. Ken
"And you don't say anything?"
Dr. Ken
"I just sit there and take it,"
Dr. Ken
"like when you have a politically incorrect Uber driver."
Dr. Ken
"Well, every relationship I ever had,"
Dr. Ken
"I argued from the first day to the last day,"
Dr. Ken
"I really want it to work with Eric."
Dr. Ken
"Yeah."
Dr. Ken
"- Yeah. Yeah. - Yeah. Yeah."
Dr. Ken
"Although, historically, you and I have spent"
Dr. Ken
"Hey. Do you think we fight too much?"
Dr. Ken
"for your... constructive criticism."
Dr. Ken
"You feeling okay?"
Dr. Ken
"Because you dance like a drunk ox."
Dr. Ken
"oh, you a funny man with some..."
Dr. Ken
"Mmm mmm mmm-mmm-mmm."
Dr. Ken
"Could I just ask you about the "Mmm mmm mmm-mmm-mmm" sound?"
Dr. Ken
"Just whenever you take a bite of something,"
Dr. Ken
"you just make this... noise."
Dr. Ken
"Well, I guess I can tell you what bothers me."
Dr. Ken
"Pat's been through a lot."
Dr. Ken
"She didn't even ask you once."
Dr. Ken
"and get at him."
Dr. Ken
"You talked to Emily?"
Dr. Ken
"take her on one of your learning walks?"
Dr. Ken
"Aah!"
Dr. Ken
"I love that about her. She's like a superhero."
Dr. Ken
"The crowd begged me to stay."
Dr. Ken
"and your imminent mugging and... your situation."
Dr. Ken
"Well, thanks."
Dr. Ken
"about you being asked to bomb... I mean host."
Dr. Ken
"And about his other family."
Dr. Ken
"- What?! - Hmm? Hmm."
Dr. Ken
"Why?"
Dr. Ken
"I took the low road."
Dr. Ken
"but I can be small... and petty."
Dr. Ken
"No, Ken's great."
Dr. Ken
"You guys have been such a great audience."
Dr. Ken
"It was hell."
Dr. Ken
"We're all good now."
Dr. Ken
"Yeah, we had no idea what to do or how to get out of it."
Dr. Ken
"Our car is waiting for us."
Dr. Ken
"Did you see any of it? How did I do?"
Dr. Ken
"And not just book club funny... HMO banquet funny."
Dr. Ken
"So, you made things right with Pat?"
Dr. Ken
"Really? You're a high road guy now?"
Dr. Ken
"Is there an e-mail from the Event Committee?!"
Dr. Ken
"You can't or you won't?"
Dr. Ken
"I get it."
Dr. Ken
"Yeah, my Roomba and I fight all the time."
Dr. Ken
"Guys, the Welltopia banquet is this weekend,"
Dr. Ken
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