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Clips from How I Met Your Mother - Cleaning House (S06E06)

"But he's clean, open to criticism and not into anything too weird."
How I Met Your Mother
"He's not bad at all."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Not bad at all." - See, now you went too far in the other direction."
How I Met Your Mother
""I'll be honest, the first few times aren't gonna be that great."
How I Met Your Mother
"He's gonna say 'A re you finished? ' more times than a waiter at a busy restaurant.""
How I Met Your Mother
"- Mom... - And Sam Gibbs wasn't the mayor."
How I Met Your Mother
"He's not my dad. My dad's Bob Barker."
How I Met Your Mother
"Barney, you've gotta stop livin' in these fairy tales that Mom told us."
How I Met Your Mother
"Bob Barker is not your father."
How I Met Your Mother
"But Bob Barker is absolutely, unequivocally not your father!"
How I Met Your Mother
"- I suppose you have a problem with the Easter Bunny too. - Not now."
How I Met Your Mother
"This address isn't too far."
How I Met Your Mother
"Are you comin' with me or not?"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Barney] So we're doing this?"
How I Met Your Mother
"We're really gonna go disturb the peaceful Long Island retirement..."
How I Met Your Mother
"of the former mayor of Yourson, North Dakota, on a Sunday afternoon."
How I Met Your Mother
"Real classy, James. Real classy."
How I Met Your Mother
"Maybe we shouldn't have brought these sloppy joes."
How I Met Your Mother
"Hey, what's done is done."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Mmm. - No. Dependable."
How I Met Your Mother
"No. Rugged. No..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I just wanna hit that perfect middle ground."
How I Met Your Mother
"How about we just go wildly to both extremes..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and just let them balance each other out?"
How I Met Your Mother
""Ted Mosby is really handsome, but extremely violent..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and really rich, but lacks bladder control.""
How I Met Your Mother
"[Beeps]"
How I Met Your Mother
"- That last bump just made me hit "send." - No, no."
How I Met Your Mother
"Don't worry. I'm sure that everyone will get it's a joke."
How I Met Your Mother
"No, they won't. They're gonna think..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Wait. "Everyone"?"
How I Met Your Mother
"[All Laughing]"
How I Met Your Mother
""Really rich"?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- You ready for this? - For what?"
How I Met Your Mother
"I don't know who lives here, but it's not my dad. [Chuckles]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Please stop."
How I Met Your Mother
"- I thought you said that he wa... - Stop. Come on."
How I Met Your Mother
"I know Bob Barker's not really, you know... I'm not crazy."
How I Met Your Mother
"I needed that."
How I Met Your Mother
"I know it may sound stupid, but I didn't always feel so great about myself growing up..."
How I Met Your Mother
"and so having a celebrity dad made me feel special."
How I Met Your Mother
"But you're right, James."
How I Met Your Mother
"It's time to let go of the fantasies."
How I Met Your Mother
"It's time to grow up."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Come here. - [Sniffles]"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Doorbell Rings]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Can I help you?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Yeah, um..."
How I Met Your Mother
"- You're Sam Gibbs? - Yes."
How I Met Your Mother
"I'm James Stinson."
How I Met Your Mother
"And, uh, I think you may have known my mother, Loretta Stinson..."
How I Met Your Mother
"in the '70s."
How I Met Your Mother
"Yeah. Yeah, l-l-l-I knew Loretta."
How I Met Your Mother
"My mother meant to send you this."
How I Met Your Mother
"You're my son."
How I Met Your Mother
"God, this must be so hard for Barney."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Laughing]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Uh-oh."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Laughing] Look at us!"
How I Met Your Mother
"It's like three of the same guy."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, my God."
How I Met Your Mother
"This explains why I was always so awesome at basketball."
How I Met Your Mother
"Guys, I'm black."
How I Met Your Mother
"Sorry. African-American."
How I Met Your Mother
"No. I'm allowed to say either."
How I Met Your Mother
"I gotta go get my camera!"
How I Met Your Mother
"He just thought he'd meet his real dad today, and clearly he's not taking it so well."
How I Met Your Mother
"Well, my head's kind of spinning too."
How I Met Your Mother
"I mean, Loretta and I only saw each other for a couple of months."
How I Met Your Mother
"You were two before I even knew you existed."
How I Met Your Mother
"And at that point, your mother made it very clear she was gonna raise you on her own."
How I Met Your Mother
"I felt I had to respect her wishes."
How I Met Your Mother
"But I always wanted to meet you."
How I Met Your Mother
"Wait, Barney and James are two years apart."
How I Met Your Mother
"He's also quite the detective."
How I Met Your Mother
"Don't worry. We'll, uh... We'll snap Barney out of this when he gets back."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Are you kidding? - Guys, Barney's losing his childhood home."
How I Met Your Mother
"He finally admitted Bob Barker's not his dad."
How I Met Your Mother
"And then he watched James meet his real father."
How I Met Your Mother
"It's just a lot to go through in one afternoon."
How I Met Your Mother
"Here, Ted! Capture the moment!"
How I Met Your Mother
"I think you'd need Salvador Dali..."
How I Met Your Mother
"to capture this particular moment, but I'll give it a whirl."
How I Met Your Mother
"Man, try to hail a cab in Manhattan."
How I Met Your Mother
"Am I right?"
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"Nope. No one's stoppin' for this."
How I Met Your Mother
"These guys don't understand what I'm talkin' about."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Ted Narrating] During that afternoon..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Sam and James began to discover how much they had in common."
How I Met Your Mother
"- ## [Piano] - # When the night has come #"
How I Met Your Mother
"Mmm."
How I Met Your Mother
"# Oh, and the land is dark #"
How I Met Your Mother
"Come on, you know this. Come on."
How I Met Your Mother
"- # And the moon # - # The moon #"
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"# Is the only #"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Together] # Light we'll see #"
How I Met Your Mother
"# Light we'll see Light we'll see #"
How I Met Your Mother
"- # Oh, I won't # - # No, I won't #"
How I Met Your Mother
"- # Be afraid # - Hey! Ho!"
How I Met Your Mother
"# Oh, I won't shed a tear #"
How I Met Your Mother
"# Not as long #"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Together] # As you stand #"
How I Met Your Mother
"- # Stand by me # - # Stand by me #"
How I Met Your Mother
"There you go. Come on."
How I Met Your Mother
"# Whenever you're in trouble #"
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"# Won't ya stand #"
How I Met Your Mother
"- # Stand by me # - ## [Scatting]"
How I Met Your Mother
"- # Stand # - # Won't you stand by #"
How I Met Your Mother
"# Just stand ##"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Weird day. - Weird day."
How I Met Your Mother
"Hey, look at that. Liz still wants to meet you."
How I Met Your Mother
"- That's great! - Mm-hmm."
How I Met Your Mother
"I guess."
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"Wait a minute."
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"Why would she wanna meet the incontinent freak show you described?"
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"- Um... - You oversold her."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Maybe a little. - You said she was a 10."
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"I did not specify on what scale."
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"You said she looked like a movie star."
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"She does. It's Robert De Niro."
How I Met Your Mother
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