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Clips from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia - Mac's Banging the Waitress (S04E04)

"Oh, well, you know..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"I was just waiting for my..."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"my best friend."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"Well... I went on a long walk, so..."
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"Hey, here's an idea for you."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
"How 'bout you take your mind off of it with some pizza?"
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"That's right."
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"I hate all the pizza."
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"You must be wasted, dude. 24 beers by yourself?"
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"Yeah, and I'm very wasted."
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"Ohh, I don't think I'll be sleeping inyourbed tonight."
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"I feel like it might be a little bit better for me..."
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"if I spent the night on the couch."
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"That's cool. Just make sure you go to the bathroom, okay,"
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"Oh, well, we, we wouldn't want that now, would we?"
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"'Cause that would be..."
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"a terrible thing to do..."
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"Seriously, bro, if you piss on the couch again, you're gonna buy us a..."
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"I'm not gonna piss on the couch, not gonna happen."
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"I just wanta be very clear: You're buying us a new couch."
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"- I'm in control of myself. - Don't piss on the couch."
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"You've done it before. All right, good night."
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"Didn't sound like best friend talk out here to me."
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"It really wasn't."
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"- Come to your real best friend. - Yeah."
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"- You're my friend. - I'm your friend."
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"- Oh, God, your breath is horrible. - Sorry. I'm like so drunk."
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"Oh, my God."
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"Dennis, wake up."
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"There's a certain situation developing between myself,"
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"Okay, well, as you know, Charlie thinks that he and I are"
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"that what we have is much stronger than that."
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"- You and I are blood brothers. - Oh, most definitely."
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"Okay, so, as my blood brother, I need to confide a secret to you."
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"- How'd you know that? - You're my blood brother, man."
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"I know more about you than you know about yourself."
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"Why?"
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"But I don't really give a shit either way because"
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"Whatever it's gonna take to finally get you two banging."
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"Yeah, hey, Dennis, I got you something."
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"You got me something? What?"
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"- That's great. - That way we can communicate better."
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"- That's awesome, man. - Yeah, it's great, right?"
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"Actually, yeah."
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"What is this?"
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"What am I seeing?"
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"Nothing, man. You're having a dream right now."
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"- I'm dreaming? - Yeah."
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"- You're dreaming. - Yeah."
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"You sure? 'Cause I feel like I'm awake."
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"No, man. You're... this is a dream that you're having."
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"All right."
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"Am I peeing?"
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"- It's all over the bed. - It's piss. He's peeing."
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"Hey, guys, if I'm peeing... You're wake me up."
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"your real best friend is, though, huh?"
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"But I need proof if I'm gonna sell him down the river."
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"Maybe the two of you are plotting against me."
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"Look, it doesn't matter. I got a plan to prove it to you anyway."
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"- All right, what's this plan of yours? - Walk with me a second."
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"So, what I did is I planted that walkie-talkie that Mac gave me in my bedroom."
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"listen to the whole thing. We're gonna catch that son of a bitch red-handed."
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"Oh, my God, that'll work."
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"- No. - I got that bad boy running 24/7."
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"- Weird. - Come into the office with me."
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"Yeah! Here we go."
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"No, my name doesn't start with a "W.""
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"Oh, just give that to me. One star."
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"- knickers off so we can jam, yeah? - Not just yet."
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"to bang me at Charlie and Frank's apartment."
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"You want to bang in Charlie and Frank's apartment?"
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"Yes."
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"Yeah, that'll be good. Yeah, we can rub his face in it."
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"Okay, if we're gonna do that, we got to be very careful,"
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"'cause I don't want to get caught slipping in and out before the coitus."
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"Let's make a plan."
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"We aren't we hearing them?"
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"What do you mean, you turned it off?"
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"I don't want to listen to this, man!"
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"- you got to listen to it. - I don't think I can."
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"Let's put it this way, you won't be able to see anybody's"
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"- face, you know what I'm saying? - Oh, it's the low down..."
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"- You got it. - I know."
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"is if you're dressed like a man."
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"Yeah. The only way it's really gonna work for me is if"
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"you're dressed like Dennis or Charlie."
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"I should probably dress like Charlie, 'cause he's kind of my height."
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"We'll dress you up in his clothes,"
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"'Cause we got to be very careful, this could be a very very messy situation."
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"'Kay, so I want you to stay behind me."
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"I think I want to be in front of you."
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"- What the hell is that all about, man? - I don't know."
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"Well... Mac's gay."
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"Are you there, Blood Brother Two?"
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"I need you to get Frank and Charlie away from their apartment, okay?"
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"I need to get in there without being detected."
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"Now he says "over and out." I can't believe he just said "over and out.""
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"What do you think he wants over at your apartment?"
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"I don't know what's going on with him, man."
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"It's like role-play!"
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"That's why he's showing us all those videos and trying to prove to us that he's a badass."
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"He wants to impress us because he's in love with us."
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"We definitely need to get to about this."
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"Okay, good."
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"Well, how does that work?"
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"Okay, well, see, here's the problem."
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"you'll see that there's someone in the bed."
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"Now, the further and wider I go,"
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"the flatter I become, like a starfish, you know?"
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"What in the hell are you talking about?"
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"It's just the best hiding spot. There aren't a lot of good hiding spots here, man."
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"Yeah, we need to find another one, 'cause we're not hiding in the bed."
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"- You are busted! - We're busted?"
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"Because you look pretty busted."
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"Goddamn it, Charlie, I knew we shouldn't have done this in the bed!"
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"Why did you have to get on top of me?!"
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"That's the only way to hide and have it not be noticeable in my apartment!"
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"There's nowhere to hide in here!"
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"- What are you doing? - What are you doing?"
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"Coming in here, talking about how in love with my thighs you are."
It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia
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