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Clips from 30 Rock - Argus (S04E04)

"Crying like a baby."
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"In three weddings on the same day, yeah."
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"♪ I never needed anyone ♪"
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"Dressing up isn't any easier for men."
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"You might as well be invisible."
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"I just received a call from Don Geiss' estate lawyer."
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"Apparently, I have been named in his will."
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"I know this is a difficult time for you, but word of advice?"
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"is black guys and sluts."
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"I just want something to remember the man by."
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"Okay."
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"His pen or his tie clip."
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"Maybe that boyhood sled he held so dear."
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"I believed he called it "Sleddy"."
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"Something which I, in turn, can then pass on to my protege'."
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"Maybe, he did have three."
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"He was such an amazing man."
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"Before we rehearse,"
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"Our boy, Grizz, is getting married on May 22nd."
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"Life is like T.V."
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"Testing tells us that people like weddings,"
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"births and episodes where a character dies."
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"My heart."
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"take this time to announce who is going to be his best man."
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"Um... I haven't decided yet."
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"Seriously."
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""Let's not do this in front of everybody"?"
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"You sound like my mother being pulled onstage"
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"at a Two Live Crew concert."
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"We have to tell Jenna we can't do her Kardashian sketch"
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"You are such a coward."
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"So look..."
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"We can't do the Kardashian sketch."
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"I heard one of your kids broke his arm."
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"Well, is he going to be okay?"
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"What's going on?"
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"Are you soaking your tampons in vodka again?"
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"No, it's just..."
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"Well, I met a guy, okay?"
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"But I'm really happy."
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"I have seen this 100 times."
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"Remember when she dated that sniper?"
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"And so, it's over."
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"Jenna, there's a laser sight on your forehead."
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"Oh, please, he's not going to fire."
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"For God's sakes, he's scared of his own mother."
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"Tell me about it."
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"Remember this breakup, when she bit me?"
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"Pete, that was, like, two years ago."
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"It just won't heal."
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"That concludes Mr. Geiss' financial disbursements."
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"His daughter, his lovely wife, his even lovelier mistress,"
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"his secret Canadian family,"
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"and his even more secret attic family."
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"All that remains are a few personal items."
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""To my daughter, Kathy, I bequeath my pocket watch."
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"It comes with very specific instructions for care,"
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"the most important of which is to not let the piece get wet.""
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""To my protege' and friend, John Francis Donaghy,"
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"My beloved pet peacock, Argus.""
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"Hello, old friend."
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"Ugh."
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"Beth..."
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"Ugh."
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"Leave it open."
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"How can I help you, Grizz?"
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"Well, Tracy keeps pushing..."
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"This is my boyfriend, Paul."
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"Pete Hornberger."
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"Hi."
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"And I'm a big fan of the show."
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"Yeah, so Paul, what's your deal?"
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"Friend, Jenna."
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"Through a friend fund."
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"Noted."
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"And what do you do for a living, Paul?"
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"Rupt circus."
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"I'm guessing already married cat strangler."
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"Living dinosaur."
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"Lemon?"
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"This is Argus."
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"He was a gift from Don Geiss."
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"His last gift, to be exact."
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"Is that an N.B.C. thing?"
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"No, Don owned Argus long before he bought N.B.C."
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"What a weird gift."
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"Uh, not at all."
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"When Don was first taking me under his wing,"
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"home in Connecticut."
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"how to avoid getting paper cuts while making"
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"love on a pile of money."
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"We three peacocks felt like we owned the world."
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"Well, that's a..."
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"God, how did he get up here so quick?"
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"Like we might someday, J-Town?"
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"We called each other sempai and kohai."
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"Terms we learned on a trip to Japan."
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"Because they played the movie Rising Sun on the airplane."
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"And now, this bird is all that remains."
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"Jack, I'm really sorry for your..."
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"Oh, his feather went in my mouth."
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"Lemon, he's marked you."
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"Go."
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"Hey, Tracy."
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"Grizz and I were just talking."
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"Continue."
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"We thought that maybe, at the wedding,"
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"you could be the lead singer of the band."
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"Really?"
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"I'd be awesome at that."
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"You would."
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"But who's going to tell U2?"
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"The wedding band is U2?"
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"I see what you're trying to do."
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"You're trying to manipulate me into not being the best man."
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"And damn it, Grizz, I've known you since"
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"I am the leader of this entourage!"
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"Now pick up that table and smash it for me!"
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"What are you doing?"
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"I'm just feeling the weight of Jenna's jewelry"
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