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Clips from Letterkenny - Ain't No Reason to Get Excited (S01E01)

"Go time! Go time!"
Letterkenny
"Look at that fuckin' treasure trail."
Letterkenny
"WAYNE: What's up with your fuckin' body hair, big shoots."
Letterkenny
"You look like a 12‐year‐old Dutch girl."
Letterkenny
"Your aesthetician quaff that for you?"
Letterkenny
"DARYL: You can kiss my ass‐thetician."
Letterkenny
"You guys do cross fit? You can cross‐fuck‐off."
Letterkenny
"Cross fart. How many times you pulled your horn today, bud?"
Letterkenny
"Oh, come on, kitten. I won't tell anyone."
Letterkenny
"Ball park six to eight?"
Letterkenny
"You're a fucking animal. Play a little five on one."
Letterkenny
"WAYNE: Hit the kitchen, mix a batch. DARYL: Feed the ducks."
Letterkenny
"Distribute some free literature."
Letterkenny
"Go time!"
Letterkenny
"Fuckin'... Shed 'em!"
Letterkenny
"BOTH: This isn't over! Jinx. You owe me a Coke."
Letterkenny
"Never buy you a Coke."
Letterkenny
"It's a hard life pickin' stones and pullin' teats"
Letterkenny
"but sure as God's got sandals it beats fightin' dudes with treasure trails."
Letterkenny
"We're out of yogurt."
Letterkenny
"WAYNE: Thank you. Welcome."
Letterkenny
"So, you talked to Angie yet?"
Letterkenny
"It's been almost a month now. Think you need to get back on the horse."
Letterkenny
"She stepped out on you. Can't go back to that and get any respect."
Letterkenny
"Not in Letterkenny."
Letterkenny
"I think I can help you."
Letterkenny
"I've been going to the Burning Bush Youth Group every Sunday."
Letterkenny
"I think you should come with me."
Letterkenny
"I think you should just eat your yogurt."
Letterkenny
"There's millions of starving kids in the world."
Letterkenny
"It's called Tinder."
Letterkenny
"Look, see there's all these girls and if you don't like one,"
Letterkenny
"you just say nope and move onto the next."
Letterkenny
"But if you do like one, then you can see how close they are"
Letterkenny
"and I don't know, maybe meet up"
Letterkenny
"or whatever."
Letterkenny
"Like, "On a scale of one to America, how free are you right now?""
Letterkenny
"Oh, Jesus! Look at these nut sacks."
Letterkenny
"Why do you hate them so much?"
Letterkenny
"Smokes are for jokes, bud!"
Letterkenny
"Put it out before it puts you out, bud!"
Letterkenny
"Put it out! Put it out!"
Letterkenny
"Tell the fish hook story, Dan."
Letterkenny
"Yeah, but he won't tell it."
Letterkenny
"Tell the story or he won't shut up."
Letterkenny
"DAN: Is there anymore trail mix?"
Letterkenny
"It's in the house."
Letterkenny
"Yous makes the most delicious trail mix, Katy,"
Letterkenny
"and I got to say that's what I appreciates about you."
Letterkenny
"Is that what you appreciate about me?"
Letterkenny
"Pitter‐patter, squirrely Dan."
Letterkenny
"So, as the story goes,"
Letterkenny
"Wayne hucks an egg at a truck with a Confederate flag"
Letterkenny
"in the back windshield"
Letterkenny
"So, we flee the scene goin' full tilt like a Peterbilt, right?"
Letterkenny
"Now, The Federales catch up to us and chase us through a few backyards"
Letterkenny
"before we scamper up into some trees"
Letterkenny
"and all Wayne's got on is a pair of cut‐off jean shorts"
Letterkenny
"so he ain't exactly super jazzed about the situation, was you Wayne?"
Letterkenny
"Oh, I'm no DJ Jazzy Jeff."
Letterkenny
"The Federale pulls out his Taser,"
Letterkenny
"and he points it up at Wayne and says some real Clint Eastwood‐sounding shit."
Letterkenny
"He says to Wayne, he says,"
Letterkenny
""If I'd known I was going to run into some uptown street toughs today,"
Letterkenny
""I'd have done up my top button.""
Letterkenny
"(CHUCKLES) That's from a John Wayne motion picture."
Letterkenny
"No, Cool Hand Luke."
Letterkenny
"Pert near anything Kevin Costner, really."
Letterkenny
"Either way, I's impressed and I'd let out an audible gasp"
Letterkenny
"so he hears me, spins around, aims the Taser up at me and lets fire,"
Letterkenny
"and if that thing doesn't latch onto my nipple ring,"
Letterkenny
"which I'm pretty sure amplified the electric current,"
Letterkenny
"he sent coursing through my entire body."
Letterkenny
"At least that's according to my cousin."
Letterkenny
"Well, you know, my second cousin."
Letterkenny
"Huh... I cried."
Letterkenny
"I'm not even ashamed to admit that."
Letterkenny
"(BURPS)"
Letterkenny
"That was well brought up. Too bad you weren't."
Letterkenny
"I should say."
Letterkenny
"Thirsty Thursdays, boys."
Letterkenny
"Might as well get balls deep in a bottle of Gus'n Bru tonight."
Letterkenny
"It's a four leaf clover. Make a wish."
Letterkenny
"Wish you weren't so fucking awkward, bud."
Letterkenny
"(BLOWS)"
Letterkenny
"(BURPS)"
Letterkenny
"Good. And you? Not too bad."
Letterkenny
"Smells like someone's in their barn clothes."
Letterkenny
"It's Dary. Four shots of Gus'n Bru, please and thank you,"
Letterkenny
"Thank you, Wayne, but I'm off the sauce."
Letterkenny
"Taking eight vitamins a day now."
Letterkenny
"two vitamin B complexes and two Cold‐FX's."
Letterkenny
"Yeah, but 'cept how many darts though?"
Letterkenny
"Twenty, 25 darts."
Letterkenny
"Oh, you got 'er down then?"
Letterkenny
"Well, sometimes, I'll have a pack and a half of smokes,"
Letterkenny
"Good enough."
Letterkenny
"All right. Won't be rude."
Letterkenny
"Oh, fuck."
Letterkenny
"(TRICKLING)"
Letterkenny
"Wayne."
Letterkenny
"Good 'n you? Not so bad."
Letterkenny
"Seen Angie, with her new dude? What a fuckin' dandy."
Letterkenny
"Yeah. He's got fugazi‐diamonds in both ears"
Letterkenny
"Driving a '94 Jeep YJ with a wave decal on the side."
Letterkenny
"Enough cologne to offend a Bangkok lady boy."
Letterkenny
"Do you want to hear the best part?"
Letterkenny
"You really wanna hear the best part."
Letterkenny
"Okay. He went full Bieber eyes."
Letterkenny
"Wayne."
Letterkenny
"Wayne, just look for fuck's sake."
Letterkenny
"Full Bieber eyes. What's that?"
Letterkenny
"I'm not familiar with his work. (DOOR OPENING)"
Letterkenny
"This must be where the dicks hang out, eh?"
Letterkenny
"Our dicks hang out."
Letterkenny
"Mind your fuckin' business, Alexander."
Letterkenny
"Hard no. My sweetie, Margaret, is a first class gal."
Letterkenny
"She's got some friends she can introduce you to."
Letterkenny
"Margaret? Sounds like a biddy old blue‐hair'd."
Letterkenny
"She's not. She's a very focused young woman on the path to eternity with Christ."
Letterkenny
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