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Clips from The Simpsons - Brake My Wife, Please (S14E14)

"I can handle it."
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"Homie, why don't you just relax and have a little soup?"
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"- Aah! Too hot. Too hot. - I'm sorry. I'm sorry."
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"Aah! Hot. Hot. Hot."
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"Warm. Tepid. Cool."
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"Cold. Cold. So cold."
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"Oh, you're really coming along, Homie."
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"Yeah. The doctor says that soon my pelvis..."
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"...will actually be stronger and more beautiful than ever."
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"Gee, everything always works out for you."
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"Marge, you're trying to hurt me."
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"What? That's crazy."
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"No, it's true. The car, the soup."
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"It's like you hate me, your own husband."
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"That's ridiculous. I don't like you."
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"I hate you!"
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"...even my own children."
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"But I never thought I'd hear it from you."
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"Who's we? Got a mouse in your purse?"
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"Manjula, I'm so glad you have finally forgiven me for having an affair."
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"She used to elbow me in the face."
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"Next, please."
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"I've been married to my husband for 10 years..."
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"...and part of me wants to kill him."
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"Perhaps you feel that your husband sees you as less of a partner..."
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"...and more of a doormat?"
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"You could be onto something there."
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"What? Oh, sorry, I got a lot on my mind."
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"That's okay. Take your time."
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"All right, before you came in, I asked you each..."
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"...to make a list of the people that are most important to you."
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"- Homer, you first. - There's Homer..."
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"...Homer J. Simpson, and Commander Cool, a.k.a. me."
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"I care so much about you, Homer."
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"But I'm not even on your list."
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"Excuse me."
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"We gotta help her."
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"If Marge isn't happy, I'm not happy."
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"And if I'm not happy, Moe is very happy."
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"But for once, this isn't about Moe."
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"What should I do, Dr. Hotdog?"
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"All right, I have an answer."
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"You must perform for her one completely unselfish gesture."
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"Yeah, full custody. That's exactly what I..."
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"- You're an idiot. - Unh."
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"You gotta knock her off her feet with something utterly romantic."
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"Something that says, "I care about you.""
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"I see. Do you have any suggestions?"
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"- I do. But the hour's over. - Here's a dollar."
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"- Romantic dinner. - Gotta go."
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"You know what Mom really loves? Julienne potatoes."
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"And for dessert, peach crumble."
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"You wanna know how to make a peach crumble? Kick it in the groin. Ha!"
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"Anyway, what's going on?"
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"I'm gonna treat Marge to a romantic dinner..."
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"...to make up for all my shortcomings."
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"Hey, me too. I can whip up my famous..."
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"...poulet au vin avec champignons à la Carl. Mwah."
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"You can bring a bag of ice."
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"Lousy Homer. I'll show him."
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"Tonight, his beloved mock apple pie will have real apples."
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"Wha...?"
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"Oh, my God. It's so beautiful."
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"Hey, look, everybody, Marge is here."
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"Oh, Homie."
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"You got everyone in Springfield here for me."
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"Honey, I couldn't keep them away if I tried, except for Flanders."
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"He was mysteriously called out of town."
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"I got your letter. I'm coming as fast as I can."
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"Tonight, we're here to serve you."
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"Sit back and enjoy the finest foods Springfield has to offer."
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"I brought you me finest catch of the day."
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"We lost a dozen good men."
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"Wow!"
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"That's it, eh?"
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"Twelve men."
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"- Unbelievable... - What?"
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"Nothing. Just a curse on your very soul."
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"Marge, I bring you the main course."
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"Elektra recording artist- slash-political activist..."
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"Oh, the Pretender."
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"I'm here to serenade you with a song."
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"Yay!"
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"From my latest album."
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"- Oh, no. - Oh."
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"Just kidding. Here's one of my many classics."
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"That I fixed with new words."
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"You hooked up in high school"
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"Now you've come so far"
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"Then you started to hate him And hit him with your car"
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"So I threw you a fancy banquet"
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"And now you can't stay mad"
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"How about a make-up snuggle?"
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"It would be so rad"
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"Oh, I'm really touched by how much you care."
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"So, uh, you don't wanna kill me anymore?"
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"- Only with kisses. - Oh."
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"Oh, don't be a wuss."
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"I've got to hand it to me"
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"It looks like it's me and you again tonight Marjorie"
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"Now I'd like to propose a toast to a woman who's done so much for us..."
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"- ...without getting anything in return. - Except a place to live and free food."
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"Now let's all raise our wine boxes..."
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"...to Marge."
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"Unh, I'm so full, my control-top panel is in shards."
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"You're welcome. And now, Marge, we cooked, you clean."
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"We've flown in the finest busboys from France... Uh, I mean, America."
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"And now to all my dear friends, I say, get the hell out of my yard."
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"Oh, a mom's work is never done."
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"Now let's look in on our hush puppies."
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"You're the first one here. Please accept this free ticket to the 1939 World's Fair."
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"I mean hate you, hate you, hate you."
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"But it's worth it just to see ye smile."
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"I love you too."
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"- What? - Ha, ha, only teasing."
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"Smithers, scoop me up."
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"Ah."
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"So let me please reiterate, I love to..."
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"Psst. Bishop to queen four."
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"Maybe we should see a counselor."
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