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Clips from Kevin Can Wait - Neighborhood Watch (S01E01)

"Absolutely."
Kevin Can Wait
"Mm-hmm."
Kevin Can Wait
"Hey, honey, no one's going to Enzo's today."
Kevin Can Wait
"But we do a catch a break during the day"
Kevin Can Wait
"A lot of people keep a journal."
Kevin Can Wait
"Yes, okay, he's a little bit rough,"
Kevin Can Wait
"It gets sucked up into the vortex."
Kevin Can Wait
"No... Rutger Hauer, star of "Blade Runner.""
Kevin Can Wait
"I, uh, hate to pee-pee in your Corn Flakes"
Kevin Can Wait
"this early in the morning, but look what I find."
Kevin Can Wait
"'Cause I'll call them back. I have the number, all right?"
Kevin Can Wait
"- Kakkerlakken! - Right!"
Kevin Can Wait
"- Oh, yeah, we have those, too. - Okay, yeah."
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay, but not tonight... Stuart."
Kevin Can Wait
"She's 72 and she's wearing a tube top."
Kevin Can Wait
"But, I mean, crime's crime, right? I mean, so..."
Kevin Can Wait
"our luggage fiasco at the airport."
Kevin Can Wait
"Should we split into teams?"
Kevin Can Wait
"No, no, no, no."
Kevin Can Wait
"Then we stomp them."
Kevin Can Wait
"I used to play pinochle on Fridays."
Kevin Can Wait
"10-91. It's all clear."
Kevin Can Wait
"Whoa, whoa."
Kevin Can Wait
"- I like Rootger. - Yeah, let's move."
Kevin Can Wait
"How do you know?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Because it was me."
Kevin Can Wait
"this is a twist I did not see coming."
Kevin Can Wait
"You're sick."
Kevin Can Wait
"For a 30 buck mailbox,"
Kevin Can Wait
"Great for you, but why do we have to be out in the cold?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah, I could be in the comfort of my own home."
Kevin Can Wait
"I told you that in private!"
Kevin Can Wait
"So, you do want to be there or you don't want to be there?"
Kevin Can Wait
"dang dang dang, bada bing, bada boom..."
Kevin Can Wait
"Whoa! Yeah!"
Kevin Can Wait
"How'd it go out there? Any luck?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay, look, I know that it's painful,"
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay. I will be right up."
Kevin Can Wait
"Hey."
Kevin Can Wait
"This favor will make it so we never have to see Stuart again."
Kevin Can Wait
"So tomorrow night, we can be back on patrol,"
Kevin Can Wait
"Brilliant!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Mm."
Kevin Can Wait
"- Kevin! - Hey!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah, and not only that,"
Kevin Can Wait
"I forgot to take it out. I totally..."
Kevin Can Wait
"No! You guys got your girls night out!"
Kevin Can Wait
"- No, he didn't! - He said, "That's not my gate.""
Kevin Can Wait
"Yes, you are. All right."
Kevin Can Wait
"Hey! Way to step up, Chale. You're all right, man."
Kevin Can Wait
"for having the confidence in me to let me join his crime spree."
Kevin Can Wait
"Guys, guys, look, there's enough fake vandalism to go around"
Kevin Can Wait
"- Yeah, to Kev. Huh? - The mastermind."
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah, you know, guys, I really got to study, so..."
Kevin Can Wait
"No, no, no, you're good. You can stay."
Kevin Can Wait
"That's... No."
Kevin Can Wait
"Go forward."
Kevin Can Wait
"No. I think it's a different folder?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay, I got to go!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh, ah! Oh!"
Kevin Can Wait
"- That's water! That was water! - Boom!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Whoa!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Hoo! Ooh, ooh!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah."
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh, my God."
Kevin Can Wait
"- Ohh! - Ohh!"
Kevin Can Wait
"That bear just did a flip!"
Kevin Can Wait
"No doubt about it."
Kevin Can Wait
"T-This car belongs to Mr. Ferguson."
Kevin Can Wait
"No. Not this time."
Kevin Can Wait
"Stuart! He didn't do it!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Mr. Ferguson... he's in a wheelchair!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Don't believe the sticker."
Kevin Can Wait
"Kevin, I'm gonna do what I should have done"
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay, look, we... We got to fix those tires"
Kevin Can Wait
"a-and replace the window... Quick."
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh."
Kevin Can Wait
"Mr. Ferguson, I-I-I just want to say I'm sorry,"
Kevin Can Wait
"I overshot the pool."
Kevin Can Wait
"Either way, you have our thanks."
Kevin Can Wait
"Is it the cat? We don't even have a cat.""
Kevin Can Wait
"That way, I wouldn't have to be dependent on other people."
Kevin Can Wait
"Hey."
Kevin Can Wait
"Just ask him."
Kevin Can Wait
"No, I don't want to bother him."
Kevin Can Wait
"Ask him!"
Kevin Can Wait
"Fine."
Kevin Can Wait
"Mr. Gable, uh, if you're going to Enzo's tonight,"
Kevin Can Wait
"perhaps I could join you for a pint."
Kevin Can Wait
"Why would we do that?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Come on, Dad. It'll be nice."
Kevin Can Wait
"And you never hang out with Chale."
Kevin Can Wait
"We're hanging out right now!"
Kevin Can Wait
"We're... We're awkward kitchen buddies."
Kevin Can Wait
"It's kind of like our thing, right?"
Kevin Can Wait
"What we've got works for us, right, Mr. Gable?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Why do you always set me up for failure?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Hey, I just set you up. The fail part was all you."
Kevin Can Wait
"Remember... My cousin Irene is coming,"
Kevin Can Wait
"and you said you'd entertain Stuart while we catch up."
Kevin Can Wait
"Ohhh."
Kevin Can Wait
"That's right... Stuart Borington."
Kevin Can Wait
"Don't tell me they're staying the night."
Kevin Can Wait
"I won't. They're staying three nights."
Kevin Can Wait
"because he's got a convention in the city."
Kevin Can Wait
"No, I... I can't do it!"
Kevin Can Wait
"The guy's brutal, all right?"
Kevin Can Wait
"He sucks the life out of you."
Kevin Can Wait
"His stories are pointless, and on top of that..."
Kevin Can Wait
"he keeps a journal."
Kevin Can Wait
"A dream journal."
Kevin Can Wait
"Still, it's not so bad."
Kevin Can Wait
"And he tells you about them."
Kevin Can Wait
"but he's nowhere near as bad as your Uncle Lou."
Kevin Can Wait
"Uncle Lou? That man is a saint."
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay, that man is over three bills"
Kevin Can Wait
"and walked around our backyard in a Speedo."
Kevin Can Wait
"That wasn't a Speedo. They were regular shorts."
Kevin Can Wait
"It's just, once he starts walking,"
Kevin Can Wait
"everything turns into a Speedo."
Kevin Can Wait
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