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Clips from 2 Broke Girls - And the Wrecking Ball (S05E05)

"Oh, hi, are you here for the meeting?"
2 Broke Girls
"Well, if Sophie has a baby, I think we found our nanny."
2 Broke Girls
"Okay, tonight's call to arms"
2 Broke Girls
"is really about each and every one of us"
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"and our dreams."
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"the backbone of Williamsburg."
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"But this is about so much more than business."
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"Let me help."
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"I took a class in motivational speaking."
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"Well motivate your ass back down."
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"I got this."
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"Do you? You're losing this crowd"
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"faster than I'm going to lose my diner."
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"He's right, move it along."
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"You make that boring crock guy look like a sweeps episode"
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"of "Empire.""
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"That was just my opening."
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"And your closing. Thanks, Caroline."
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"Yes, I said yes, folks."
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"Yes, we are all businesses,"
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"but we are one hell of a lot more than that!"
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"Impressive. It's like Tony Robbins"
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"and a pine nut had a baby."
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"We are a family,"
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"Can I get a "what-what?""
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"What-what!"
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"Can I get a high-five?"
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"High-five!"
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"- All right! - High-five!"
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"I'm so jealous."
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"I've been dying to do that for years."
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"And tomorrow, we need you,"
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"and I mean every one of you,"
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"to join my diner family at that public hearing"
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"down at the Brooklyn Courthouse"
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"and we are going to tell them"
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"they can keep their stinking buyout money."
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"Yeah!"
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"- to buyout our leases. - Yeah."
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"Not 20,000, not 30,000..."
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"I wouldn't have to sell these dumb crystals anymore."
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"I predict that the net worth"
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"of this now dilapidated group of businesses"
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"will at least quadruple."
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"And commissioner, you don't know me,"
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"but when it comes to finance,"
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"I'm very hands on."
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"And also a douche."
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"We'll take a break and then hear arguments"
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"from the opposing side."
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"and I want the truth."
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"Is it, "Can you smell that onion bagel on my breath,""
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"is as far-fetched as Sophie's baby dream?"
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"You know Sophie's right there, right?"
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"Don't get her mad."
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"I once saw her open up a can of paint"
2 Broke Girls
"with her knees."
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"I mean, aren't all dreams kind of crazy?"
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"Isn't that why they're called dreams,"
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"'cause they're not real?"
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"At some point, you have to wake up and pee, right?"
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"Well, at least you won't have to listen to that annoying"
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"tour guide's speech twice a day anymore."
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"Right, if you look to your left,"
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"you'll see a failing cupcake shop"
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"with two completely deluded shop owners."
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"In fact, the only redeeming feature"
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"in this waste of architecture are the historic Tiffany windows"
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"right next to those two bitches."
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"He says that? I totally missed that?"
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"Oh, my God, those Tiffany windows"
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"might be old enough to qualify us"
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"as a historic landmark building."
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"Oh, oh, my God, I'll be right back."
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"Where are you going?"
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"I need proof that those windows are legit."
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"If I'm not back when it's our turn to speak,"
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"Just go on an on talking about nothing."
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"Got it. Pretend I'm you."
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"But you would need a miracle to find that proof in time."
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"Psst, Max, you got a tampon?"
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"I just got my period."
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"Either that, or I've been shot."
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"Sophie can still have a baby!"
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"See, miracles can happen!"
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"The woman is right there."
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"I've worked at that diner since 1989,"
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"so, peace out."
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"She's still not back. Keep going."
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"Your Honor, I've been working at that diner"
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"about the building in question, including, for some reason,"
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"She was from Brooklyn!"
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"I thought it was pertinent, Your Honor."
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"Han, go, go, go, go."
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"No, I already blew this once."
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"Finally, you admit you blew something"
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"when I can't enjoy it."
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"Oleg, you go."
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"from a sort of "Eyes Wide Shut" situation."
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"You go."
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"No, nothing good ever happened to me"
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"Every single time, they just gave me back to my mother."
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"Yeah, I've got something to say."
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"You're a lady judge."
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"You got any Midol?"
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"Damn it, yo!"
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"I guess I have something to say."
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"Wonderful."
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"Nice model you got there,"
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"except IMAXs are supposed to be big."
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"That's kind of the point."
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"Miss, if you don't have anything pertinent..."
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"Stop, you can't tear our building down!"
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"So excited, I feel like I'm in "Legally Blonde.""
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"Those Tiffany windows are over 100 years old,"
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"making it a historic, landmark building."
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"Do you have documented proof of this?"
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"Yes, I do, your honor."
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"So dramatic. I'm loving it."
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"Living, breathing, boring proof."
2 Broke Girls
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