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Clips from Archer - Vision Quest (S06E06)

"Jeez, LaRue, can you believe this?"
Archer
"A mandatory meeting at 7:00 A.M.?"
Archer
"Wonder what crawled up her butt."
Archer
"Ugh, there's no telling. Our bodies are aswarm"
Archer
"with microscopic organisms, Pam."
Archer
"Literally aswarm."
Archer
"Wait. What? What have you heard?"
Archer
"About the staff meeting? Oh, right. Yes. Never mind."
Archer
"Then may I suggest we get up there,"
Archer
"so we don't have to find out what "grave consequences" means."
Archer
"It means-- In the context of her memo."
Archer
"Jesus, what's up his butt?"
Archer
"I think the important thing now"
Archer
"is that we don't start any sort of panic."
Archer
"Hurry up, ya ding-dongs!"
Archer
"Wait, wait, wait! I'm coming! Hurry up."
Archer
"Come on, come on, come on. Oh, keep your panties on."
Archer
"One step ahead of you. Or am I?"
Archer
"Wait. Is Archer blowing this off?"
Archer
"No. Hold the door. Hold the door!"
Archer
"I am. It's not doing anything."
Archer
"Damn it, Ray, hold the frickin' door!"
Archer
"Oh, no! It's maximum overdrive all over--"
Archer
"Oh, good. You made it."
Archer
"Look, Ray, one is red and one is green."
Archer
"What are you, color blind?"
Archer
"I am, actually."
Archer
"Typical. Of what?"
Archer
"So, does anybody have any idea what this meeting is about?"
Archer
"Well, if I know Ms. Archer, it's-- Butt bugs."
Archer
"What? Not what I was--"
Archer
"Ugh! That was a figure of speech."
Archer
"They all are! Hey, will you quit yelling?"
Archer
"Will you? Yes!"
Archer
"Hey! Remain calm. Do not panic."
Archer
"No one's panicking, Krieger."
Archer
"Only because they haven't hatched yet."
Archer
"Who? What hasn't hatched?"
Archer
"What? Quit yelling!"
Archer
"Krieger, what hasn't hatched? I've said too much."
Archer
"Krieger, I swear to--"
Archer
"Oh, my God."
Archer
"Remain calm. Do not panic."
Archer
"Krieger, shut up. See? It's broken."
Archer
"Ray? Archer?"
Archer
"Hang on."
Archer
"Ray, Cyril, give me a hand here."
Archer
"Lana... What?"
Archer
"You-- Should be doing this."
Archer
"You know..."
Archer
"Oh, my God! We work in a coal mine?"
Archer
"Carol, shut up."
Archer
"You're not my coal mine supervisor!"
Archer
"Yeah. Hey, guys?"
Archer
"Oh, damn it."
Archer
"What? What is it?"
Archer
"Well, thanks to Ray, who let's just all assume"
Archer
"broke the elevator somehow, we're stuck at the top."
Archer
"I hope."
Archer
"Hello! Hello!"
Archer
"Stop it. No one else can hear you,"
Archer
"because no one else is here yet."
Archer
"Not that other people actually work here."
Archer
"What do you mean? Where'd they go?"
Archer
"Remember when the office shut down,"
Archer
"and we spent an entire year as coke dealers?"
Archer
"What, so people just quit? And on the subject of things"
Archer
"that don't work here anymore,"
Archer
"my phone. Uh, got nothing."
Archer
"I am sans bars. Yeah, you're not gonna get a signal."
Archer
"I installed an R.F. jammer on the roof."
Archer
"Of the building? No, of the elevator."
Archer
"Why? You did what?"
Archer
"And for what possible reason?"
Archer
"So people would quit staring at their phones and talk to each other."
Archer
"Okay, well, then let's open the--"
Archer
"One, two, three, go! Trap door!"
Archer
"Ray, open the trap door."
Archer
"He can't. Wha--"
Archer
"Oh, my God! Cyril, please."
Archer
"I am way stronger than you."
Archer
"That being said, this thing's stuck."
Archer
"It's not stuck, it's locked from the outside."
Archer
"Wait. What? It's not for stranded passengers to get out,"
Archer
"it's for rescue crews to get in."
Archer
"The last thing they want is people crawling around"
Archer
"on top of a malfunctioning elevator car."
Archer
"Who is "they"? Big elevator."
Archer
"Not a thing."
Archer
"And why do you know so much about elevators?"
Archer
"I don't know. It's a hobby."
Archer
"I guess I've just always been fascinated by them."
Archer
"I honestly have no response to that."
Archer
"Anyway, I bet the top of the car smashed"
Archer
"right into the motor, so--"
Archer
"Yeesh. Hope the radio jammer's okay."
Archer
"Ow! Ow! Ow, ow! Ow!"
Archer
"Thanks, Krieger. I think we all needed that."
Archer
"And besides, we don't need cell phones. We have a--"
Archer
"Elevator phone! Cyril, try that."
Archer
"I am, if you'd shut up."
Archer
"Oh, gross! This phone is all sticky."
Archer
"Yeah, mine at home gets bad sticky."
Archer
"Ew. Of course it does."
Archer
"And since when are you elevator boss? Birth?"
Archer
"And..."
Archer
"It's dead. Typical."
Archer
"Okay, Ray. Interface."
Archer
"I'm sorry? With the controls."
Archer
"Beep, boop, boop, boop! Come on, cyborg."
Archer
"R2-D2 it. "R2-D2 it.""
Archer
"Yeah, probe around in there and whatever."
Archer
"Shut down the tractor beam."
Archer
"With what, my dick?"
Archer
"I-- however you normally do it."
Archer
"I don't normally do it!"
Archer
"I know, but this is an emergency."
Archer
"Hey! Hey!"
Archer
"Damn it, Carol. There's nobody--"
Archer
"Shut up, stupid. It's Milton!"
Archer
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