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Clips from Lucifer - Lucifer, Stay. Good Devil. (S01E01)

"When you've made a decision,"
Lucifer
"you know how to find me."
Lucifer
"♪♪"
Lucifer
"MAN: Hey, Robbie, where you been?"
Lucifer
"If you're gonna follow me,"
Lucifer
"maybe I can do something good with this."
Lucifer
"This... is the Web site for the Red Cross."
Lucifer
"Give blood, volunteer."
Lucifer
"Don't be like the asshat filming this."
Lucifer
"Good job, kid."
Lucifer
"Better than I did."
Lucifer
"TRIXIE: Mommy? Yeah, baby?"
Lucifer
"Are you looking at a no-no site?"
Lucifer
"No. Why would you think that?"
Lucifer
"Because you put it away so fast,"
Lucifer
"and you look really, really guilty."
Lucifer
"No, baby, I'm just doing police work."
Lucifer
"I thought you weren't supposed to be working."
Lucifer
"And I thought you were supposed to be getting ready"
Lucifer
"to hang out with your dad. (doorbell rings)"
Lucifer
"Who is early, apparently."
Lucifer
"Do you really live here?"
Lucifer
"I thought I must have gotten the wrong address."
Lucifer
"How do you afford this place?"
Lucifer
"Do you take bribes?"
Lucifer
"I don't. And what are you doing here?"
Lucifer
"Lucifer!"
Lucifer
"Ah, hello again, small human."
Lucifer
"(chuckles nervously)"
Lucifer
"Uh, this-this is yours, yes?"
Lucifer
"Yeah, that's Molly McDowell."
Lucifer
"She's a ballerina by day,"
Lucifer
"but a ninja chemist by night."
Lucifer
"When a simple yes would've sufficed."
Lucifer
"Right, on you go, then. Go on, fetch away."
Lucifer
"(whistles)"
Lucifer
"Well, go on, then."
Lucifer
"Uh, is this too advanced for her?"
Lucifer
"You're funny."
Lucifer
"Trixie, babe, come on."
Lucifer
"Get ready."
Lucifer
"You need to leave now."
Lucifer
"I had no idea that Hot Tub High School paid so well."
Lucifer
"It didn't. And can you shh on the Hot Tub?"
Lucifer
"(whispers): She doesn't know."
Lucifer
"What, that her mom was a giant star?"
Lucifer
"Why not?"
Lucifer
"Not 'cause of the old...? (imitates fanfare)"
Lucifer
"Yeah. And can you never do that again?"
Lucifer
"Right, sorry. So how do you afford this place?"
Lucifer
"I don't; it's my mother's."
Lucifer
"I moved in after Dan and I separated, okay?"
Lucifer
"LUCIFER: Penelope Decker?"
Lucifer
"Hold on a minute."
Lucifer
"Your mother's Penelope Decker?"
Lucifer
"- Queen of '80s cheeseball sci-fi? - Yeah."
Lucifer
"(gasps) You have to introduce me."
Lucifer
"Mm, I don't."
Lucifer
"And I probably won't."
Lucifer
"So you're part of a family dynasty like me."
Lucifer
"No wonder we get on so well."
Lucifer
"How did you rebel?"
Lucifer
"What do you mean?"
Lucifer
"Well, you're mad at the dung beetle."
Lucifer
"You must have done something salacious in your youth."
Lucifer
"What was it? Did you kiss a girl and like it?"
Lucifer
"I don't want to talk about it."
Lucifer
"Oh, so there is something."
Lucifer
"Two girls?"
Lucifer
"- Okay. - An Eiffel Tower?"
Lucifer
"What's an Eiffel Tower?"
Lucifer
"It's marvelous. It's when two chaps high-five at the top,"
Lucifer
"- then the young lady... - Okay, there is an eight-year-old in the room"
Lucifer
"who doesn't need to hear about an Eiffel Tower."
Lucifer
"What...? What about the case?"
Lucifer
"If I were secretly working on it, having you around"
Lucifer
"- drawing attention won't be good, would it? - Well, maybe not,"
Lucifer
"but it'd be much more fun, wouldn't it, Detective,"
Lucifer
"if we carried on working together?"
Lucifer
"Detective?"
Lucifer
"Detective?"
Lucifer
"Mm-hmm."
Lucifer
"I understand."
Lucifer
"Mm-hmm."
Lucifer
"Hello, there."
Lucifer
"I'd very much like to see Nick Hofmeister."
Lucifer
"I'm afraid I can't... Oh."
Lucifer
"Hello."
Lucifer
"Hello to you."
Lucifer
"MAN (over phone): Hello? (chuckles)"
Lucifer
"(chuckles)"
Lucifer
"(door opens)"
Lucifer
"LUCIFER: Afternoon, dung beetle."
Lucifer
"We need to talk."
Lucifer
"(chuckles)"
Lucifer
"I, um, I'm not gonna tell you anything, man."
Lucifer
"No, no, no, I don't want to know about the case,"
Lucifer
"so you can keep your dirty little secrets."
Lucifer
"No, I'd like to know about Chloe Decker."
Lucifer
"And you're gonna tell me everything."
Lucifer
"I have an effect on people."
Lucifer
"It's a way of pulling out their"
Lucifer
"deepest desires, revealing the truth within."
Lucifer
"It works on everyone."
Lucifer
"Everyone except for Chloe Decker."
Lucifer
"And I suspect it's somehow related"
Lucifer
"to my recent bouts of humanity."
Lucifer
"What does this have to do with me?"
Lucifer
"Well, you know everything about her, don't you?"
Lucifer
"All her sordid secrets."
Lucifer
"I'm hoping they'll help me understand"
Lucifer
"why she's so frustratingly immune to my charms."
Lucifer
"Chloe doesn't have any sordid secrets."
Lucifer
"(chuckles)"
Lucifer
"I've seen the hatred in her eyes when she looks at you."
Lucifer
"Come on."
Lucifer
"You must have something."
Lucifer
"Do you know what happened when she was 19?"
Lucifer
"She starred in Hot Tub High School"
Lucifer
"and revealed her rather spectacular assets to the world."
Lucifer
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