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Clips from Eight Legged Freaks (2002)

"Aunt Gladys, how can you listen to this wacko?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"I think he's very informative."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Do Floyd and Leroy still have that barbershop?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Good idea. People are talking."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"You can't light those matches?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Maybe it's a sign to quit."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"If the aliens come and try to anal- Probe me..."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"...I'm telling you, I'm not taking that!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"If you want a piece of me, don't take that piece!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"So how much is a shave these days?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- Four bucks. - Four bucks?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- It's a good deal. - Got to give a good deal."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Can't charge around here what a barber can charge in other places..."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"...where they got money."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"And jobs."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Of course, some people don't know a good deal when they see one."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- Maybe I don't need a shave. - Hold still."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"I wouldn't want to cut you."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Bret, slow down."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- I thought you loved me. - I do. I do."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- But, I just... - But, what?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"I don't want to lose my virginity in the front seat of a truck."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Why didn't you say so? I got a blanket in the back."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"No. That's not it. I just don't think I'm ready."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- Tammy and Larry do it every night. - Fine, call them."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Have a menage a trois if you want."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- That dirty talk just drives me nuts. - Bret, no."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Bret, please."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- I'm warning you, okay? - I can't help it."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"You just bring out the beast in me."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Back off!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"My balls!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"God, my balls!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Damn it! I pissed my pants! Don't you think you're overreacting?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- I was just copping a feel! - Overreacting?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"I can't believe my mom was right about you."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Do you have any idea how embarrassing that is?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Ash, wait. I'm sorry!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Check out Bret."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Let's go! They're coming. Come on, let's go! Get on your bikes!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- Dude, did you piss your pants? - We gotta go."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"They're coming!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Looks like the only thing going is you, dude."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Holy crap!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"They're getting closer! Move it!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"We have ostriches, cats and dogs disappearing all over town."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Last time I checked, cats and dogs are not fish."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"And ostriches farmed are not game."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"There has to be somebody at Fish and Game who can help."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Hey, watch it!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Yes."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"What the hell are these things?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Here we go again. The phone lines are down."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"They'll tell you it's a technical error."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"But you know what it is. They're shutting us down!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"I know what you're saying to yourself. " He's paranoid. He's crazy.""
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"But you know, there's an old saying:"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean people aren't following me."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"All of a sudden there's a communication blackout."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"At the bottom of the bag. It's where they always put the food."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Here it is."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Here we go, Bruisie."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Bruisie?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Bruiser?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Aunt Gladys?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Bruiser?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Oh, my God."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Oh, Lord."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Are you in there?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Oh, my God!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"I'm coming, baby. I'm coming."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Aunt Gladys, I lost the face fuzz."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Bruiser?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Aunt Gladys?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"This ain't no cactus."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Mike!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Mike! Sam!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- Can I talk to Mike? - Why?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"I can't explain now."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- Look what I found in my basement. - That thing is huge!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Give me a second!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Hold this."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"What's going on?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"So check this out."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"After taking careful measurements of the exoskeleton I found at Joshua's..."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"...I calculated the spider was the size shown here."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- What spider? - The hole in the basement was bigger."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"What hole?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Let's input the measurements from your exoskeleton and see what happens."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"That's more like it..."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"...unfortunately."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- What the hell is this? - It's my media- Induced nightmare."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Oh, God."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"So you're telling me a giant spider ate Gladys?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- Maybe not. Was there webbing around? - Yeah, lots of it."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"She might have been attacked by a male orb weaver."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"What's the difference?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Males compete for the female by bringing her presents."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"The prey is cocooned alive so she can feed on it in her nest."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- Women like breakfast in bed. - So Gladys might still be alive?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"That's Ashley! Come on!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Look out!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Keys. Keys, keys, keys!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Mike, get out of here!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"- Throw me the scissors! - Scissors?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Scissors! Here you go!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Sam! Help!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Hey, spidey!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Thank you."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Pete! Come in, Pete."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Hold on to your shirt."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Is that you, Sam?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"I don't know what's going on, but the phones are down."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"I know. Take the weapons and get to my house."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Guns? Why would we be needing...?"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Just do it!"
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Okay. All right. Okay."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"Winchester, 30.06..."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"...Mossberg pump..."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
"...and the Lee Harvey Oswald rifle."
Eight Legged Freaks (2002)
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