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Clips from Mike Tyson Mysteries - My Favorite Mystery (S03E03)

"but just hear me out."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"The reason why you're swimming out there alone in that cold, deep water,"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"and not me and Marquess and Yung, is because..."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Shit, I can't remember what the reason was."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Oh, well. Stay safe, buddy."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Ah, what a collection of assholes."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Hello!"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Are you the Loch Ness Monster?"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I'm not a monster."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I'm scared of everybody,"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"and I just try to hide, and every once in a while, they spot me."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"But I'm so lonely."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"All I want is to love and to be loved."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Oh, my God, that's the saddest thing I've ever heard."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Will you be my friend?"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Of course, big fella."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"He gave us the signal. Torpedo!"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Damn, Yung. Way to bum us all out."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"The whole point of a clip show is to remember the good stuff."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"The highlights, the sizzles."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Like, for example, remember when we all stood on that cliff"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"and watched that nuclear bomb destroy that small town in Arizona?"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"You know what I'm saying. Fun stuff."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"-(RUMBLING) -(YUNG HEE GASPS)"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"(GASPS) Oh, thank God."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"What the (BLEEP)?"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Doesn't anyone want to know what my favorite mystery was?"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"How could you have a favorite mystery? We just met you."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Oh, no, little boy."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Mmm-mmm."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"We've all met before."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Hey, eyes up here!"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Hmm? Oh, oh."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Sorry, I just... I just can't believe that's still going."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I was in the middle of robbing the US Treasury."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"OLD MAN: Oh, we thought we were in trouble,"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"until he stopped and turned, as if posing for a photo."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Just posing."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"We watched him there for a bit, posing and primping and carrying on."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"-MARQUESS: Mm. Mm. -It went on for 20 minutes."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"We were able to fully unload that bank vault."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I've never seen such a vain man."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Hmm, mmm-hmm."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Hmm-- Oh!"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I used half of the money to buy an island in the South Pacific."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"OLD MAN: Inspired by the Jurassic Park films,"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I paid some graduate students"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"from the Texas A&M School of Veterinary Medicine"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"to make me a bunch of dinosaurs."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"And make them they did."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"But one of them got cold feet and sent you a pigeon with a note."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"No one's gonna disrupt the balance of nature on my watch."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"OLD MAN: The poor dinosaurs."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"They'd been brought back to life just to be mowed down like the buffalo."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"And when you ran out of bullets, you used your fists."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"My plans for a dinosaur theme park lay in ruins."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"But thankfully, I had used the rest of the stolen money"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"to build an enormous cement, four-armed samurai warrior in New Mexico."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"What on earth for?"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I don't know."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"That's unclear, but I had visited Japan as a boy,"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"so maybe that had something to do with it."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"And land is so cheap in New Mexico,"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"especially down there near Las Cruces."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Mmm-mmm-mmm."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"This might have been a waste of $50 million."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"What is that?"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"MAN: (ON RADIO) Er, Mr. Tyson, you were just supposed to sit in the jet for a photo op."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"You were definitely not supposed to take off. Over."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Just a quick joyride. Over."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I think I'm starting to get the hang of it. Over."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Is that..."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"OLD MAN: It is a Christmas miracle that I survived."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Homeless and now penniless."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I did the only thing that made sense."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I joined a passing Kabuki theater troupe"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"on their way to perform in Las Vegas."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Oh, man, I hate Kabuki."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"OLD MAN: I know."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"But now I am going to have my revenge."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Prepare to die, Mike Tyson!"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"PIGEON: Oh, my God, did you have that pistol in your butthole?"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"-(GASPS) -(ROARS)"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"-(YUNG HEE SCREAMS) -MIKE: Whoa!"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"-(MARQUESS SCREAMS) -(OLD MAN CHOKING)"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"(YUNG HEE WHIMPERING)"
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Aloha! It's me, Haulani."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"I don't think the repairman was ever gonna come, really."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"Climb on my back and let me show you my favorite place in Hawaii."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"The Mauna Kea summit."
Mike Tyson Mysteries
"This is the only place in Hawaii where you can see snow."
Mike Tyson Mysteries