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Clips from I Dream of Jeannie - My Master, the Magician (S01E01)

And you better be good, major. You better be very good.

"And you better be good, major. You better be very good."

I Dream of Jeannie

Well-- The thing-- This can all be explained....

"Well-- The thing-- This can all be explained...."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, he is up to something bad, master.

"Oh, he is up to something bad, master."

I Dream of Jeannie

Yeah, you're telling me.

"Yeah, you're telling me."

I Dream of Jeannie

Would you like me to turn him into something?

"Would you like me to turn him into something?"

I Dream of Jeannie

No, no, Jeannie.

"No, no, Jeannie."

I Dream of Jeannie

l just hope he doesn't turn me into something.

"l just hope he doesn't turn me into something."

I Dream of Jeannie

Like, maybe, a civilian.

"Like, maybe, a civilian."

I Dream of Jeannie

You mean, Dr. Bellows caught you in the air?

"You mean, Dr. Bellows caught you in the air?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Yeah. Jeannie couldn't get me down in time.

"Yeah. Jeannie couldn't get me down in time."

I Dream of Jeannie

And before that, he caught you in the office?

"And before that, he caught you in the office?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Roger, he's driving me crazy.

"Roger, he's driving me crazy."

I Dream of Jeannie

What do you think you're doing to him? lt's a question of who cracks first.

"What do you think you're doing to him? lt's a question of who cracks first."

I Dream of Jeannie

l'll tell you who's gonna crack first, l am.

"l'll tell you who's gonna crack first, l am."

I Dream of Jeannie

As long as he can't prove anything, there's nothing to worry about.

"As long as he can't prove anything, there's nothing to worry about."

I Dream of Jeannie

Yeah, well, l don't know about that. Dr. Bellows is no idiot.

"Yeah, well, l don't know about that. Dr. Bellows is no idiot."

I Dream of Jeannie

Dr. Bellows is-- We were just talking about you, sir.

"Dr. Bellows is-- We were just talking about you, sir."

I Dream of Jeannie

l'll bet you were. And l was just talking about you.

"l'll bet you were. And l was just talking about you."

I Dream of Jeannie

We're putting on a little show for the personnel at the base Saturday.

"We're putting on a little show for the personnel at the base Saturday."

I Dream of Jeannie

A show. l love shows, sir.

"A show. l love shows, sir."

I Dream of Jeannie

General Peterson thought you might help to entertain.

"General Peterson thought you might help to entertain."

I Dream of Jeannie

Me? Well, l don't really do anything, sir.

"Me? Well, l don't really do anything, sir."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Don't be so modest, major. -Modest? Tony?

"-Don't be so modest, major. -Modest? Tony?"

I Dream of Jeannie

You're the greatest magician in the whole world.

"You're the greatest magician in the whole world."

I Dream of Jeannie

You can do a little magic act for us, major.

"You can do a little magic act for us, major."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, no-- Well, l just--

"Oh, no-- Well, l just--"

I Dream of Jeannie

l'll tell General Peterson that you've accepted.

"l'll tell General Peterson that you've accepted."

I Dream of Jeannie

Well, goodbye, gentlemen.

"Well, goodbye, gentlemen."

I Dream of Jeannie

Roger--

"Roger--"

I Dream of Jeannie

-Master. -Yeah?

"-Master. -Yeah?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Be careful, it is a trap.

"Be careful, it is a trap."

I Dream of Jeannie

Why don't you get yourself sent to detached duty somewhere?

"Why don't you get yourself sent to detached duty somewhere?"

I Dream of Jeannie

lf l'm not careful l'll be detached from the astronaut program.

"lf l'm not careful l'll be detached from the astronaut program."

I Dream of Jeannie

What makes you think something's up?

"What makes you think something's up?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Please do not appear in this show, master.

"Please do not appear in this show, master."

I Dream of Jeannie

l haven't any choice. l already told him l was an amateur magician.

"l haven't any choice. l already told him l was an amateur magician."

I Dream of Jeannie

You'll have to be a professional magician to get out of this.

"You'll have to be a professional magician to get out of this."

I Dream of Jeannie

l can turn you into a wonderful magician.

"l can turn you into a wonderful magician."

I Dream of Jeannie

No. No, that's just what l don't want, Jeannie.

"No. No, that's just what l don't want, Jeannie."

I Dream of Jeannie

Saturday night l'm gonna go up there as an amateur magician...

"Saturday night l'm gonna go up there as an amateur magician..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...and Dr. Bellows won't be able to prove a thing.

"...and Dr. Bellows won't be able to prove a thing."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, operator, l'd like to place a call to Cincinnati, Ohio.

"Oh, operator, l'd like to place a call to Cincinnati, Ohio."

I Dream of Jeannie

l want to talk to Nestor the Great.

"l want to talk to Nestor the Great."

I Dream of Jeannie

N-E-S-T-O-R.

"N-E-S-T-O-R."

I Dream of Jeannie

That's right. At the Palace Theatre.

"That's right. At the Palace Theatre."

I Dream of Jeannie

Thank you.

"Thank you."

I Dream of Jeannie

Now, ladies and gentlemen, l want you to notice...

"Now, ladies and gentlemen, l want you to notice..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...l have absolutely nothing up my sleeves.

"...l have absolutely nothing up my sleeves."

I Dream of Jeannie

l take an ordinary walking cane...

"l take an ordinary walking cane..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...which l turn, by the use of magic...

"...which l turn, by the use of magic..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...into a beautiful bunch of flowers.

"...into a beautiful bunch of flowers."

I Dream of Jeannie

You're a real amateur's amateur.

"You're a real amateur's amateur."

I Dream of Jeannie

They don't make these things the way they used to. l....

"They don't make these things the way they used to. l...."

I Dream of Jeannie

That is lovely, master.

"That is lovely, master."

I Dream of Jeannie

There you are, madam.

"There you are, madam."

I Dream of Jeannie

And now for my next trick l will-- Oh, yes.

"And now for my next trick l will-- Oh, yes."

I Dream of Jeannie

For my next trick, with your kind attention...

"For my next trick, with your kind attention..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...l will make this everyday, ordinary--

"...l will make this everyday, ordinary--"

I Dream of Jeannie

-Fish bowl? -Fish bowl.

"-Fish bowl? -Fish bowl."

I Dream of Jeannie

--fish bowl disappear into thin air before your very eyes.

"--fish bowl disappear into thin air before your very eyes."

I Dream of Jeannie

Bravo!

"Bravo!"

I Dream of Jeannie

Jeannie, l haven't done the trick yet.

"Jeannie, l haven't done the trick yet."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, sorry.

"Oh, sorry."

I Dream of Jeannie

Abracadabra, kalamazoo!

"Abracadabra, kalamazoo!"

I Dream of Jeannie

Jeannie, l would very much like to do my own magic.

"Jeannie, l would very much like to do my own magic."

I Dream of Jeannie

Are you sure you're ready for show business?

"Are you sure you're ready for show business?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Now, for my next trick...

"Now, for my next trick..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...l will need my hat, please.

"...l will need my hat, please."

I Dream of Jeannie

Sure.

"Sure."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Thank you. -Wait a minute.

"-Thank you. -Wait a minute."

I Dream of Jeannie

You're not gonna break an egg in your cap?

"You're not gonna break an egg in your cap?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Believe it or not, this is the easiest trick in the book.

"Believe it or not, this is the easiest trick in the book."

I Dream of Jeannie

l will now, with the aid of my magic wand and a little bit of magic...

"l will now, with the aid of my magic wand and a little bit of magic..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...turn this egg into scrambled eggs.

"...turn this egg into scrambled eggs."

I Dream of Jeannie

Abracadabra, kalamazoo, presto!

"Abracadabra, kalamazoo, presto!"

I Dream of Jeannie

And here we have....

"And here we have...."

I Dream of Jeannie

That's the funniest thing l ever saw in my life.

"That's the funniest thing l ever saw in my life."

I Dream of Jeannie

-That is lovely. -Did you see that, Jeannie?

"-That is lovely. -Did you see that, Jeannie?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Wait until l tell the guys in the base about this.

"Wait until l tell the guys in the base about this."

I Dream of Jeannie

You scrambled an egg in my hat.

"You scrambled an egg in my hat."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, my-- Oh, my hat.

"Oh, my-- Oh, my hat."

I Dream of Jeannie

Flowers and the silk. Oh, yeah, the silk. And the bag, right.

"Flowers and the silk. Oh, yeah, the silk. And the bag, right."

I Dream of Jeannie

Please, master, let me turn him into a frog.

"Please, master, let me turn him into a frog."

I Dream of Jeannie

-No. -A bat?

"-No. -A bat?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Jeannie, Dr. Bellows is only doing his job.

"Jeannie, Dr. Bellows is only doing his job."

I Dream of Jeannie

And you are only doing your job, master.

"And you are only doing your job, master."

I Dream of Jeannie

Yeah-- Well, unfortunately, my job does not include...

"Yeah-- Well, unfortunately, my job does not include..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...floating around in my living room.

"...floating around in my living room."

I Dream of Jeannie

Can you not say you had an accident?

"Can you not say you had an accident?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Then you would not have to do your magic act.

"Then you would not have to do your magic act."

I Dream of Jeannie

They'd never believe me.

"They'd never believe me."

I Dream of Jeannie

Really, that's too obvious.

"Really, that's too obvious."

I Dream of Jeannie

Look, let's face it, l've got to go through with this.

"Look, let's face it, l've got to go through with this."

I Dream of Jeannie

-l want you to promise me something. -Yes, master.

"-l want you to promise me something. -Yes, master."

I Dream of Jeannie

l want you to promise me that no matter what happens...

"l want you to promise me that no matter what happens..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...you won't help me with my magic.

"...you won't help me with my magic."

I Dream of Jeannie

Oh, l cannot promise you that, master.

"Oh, l cannot promise you that, master."

I Dream of Jeannie

l have seen your magic, and you need all the help you can get.

"l have seen your magic, and you need all the help you can get."

I Dream of Jeannie

That's beside the point, Jeannie. l want you to promise me.

"That's beside the point, Jeannie. l want you to promise me."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Oh, but-- -Jeannie.

"-Oh, but-- -Jeannie."

I Dream of Jeannie

Very well, master.

"Very well, master."

I Dream of Jeannie

l promise l will not help you with your magic.

"l promise l will not help you with your magic."

I Dream of Jeannie

Thank you. Aren't you even gonna...

"Thank you. Aren't you even gonna..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...wish me good luck?

"...wish me good luck?"

I Dream of Jeannie

l'll be happy to wish you good luck...

"l'll be happy to wish you good luck..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...but l have a terrible feeling it is not going to do you any good.

"...but l have a terrible feeling it is not going to do you any good."

I Dream of Jeannie

Jeannie, please.

"Jeannie, please."

I Dream of Jeannie

Thank you.

"Thank you."

I Dream of Jeannie

l'm afraid l don't understand, Dr. Bellows.

"l'm afraid l don't understand, Dr. Bellows."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Oh, sit down, Mr. Nestor. -Thank you.

"-Oh, sit down, Mr. Nestor. -Thank you."

I Dream of Jeannie

You mean you brought me all the way here...

"You mean you brought me all the way here..."

I Dream of Jeannie

...just to watch another magician perform?

"...just to watch another magician perform?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Well, this man is not a magician, Mr. Nestor.

"Well, this man is not a magician, Mr. Nestor."

I Dream of Jeannie

He's an impostor.

"He's an impostor."

I Dream of Jeannie

Well, if you already know that, why do you need me?

"Well, if you already know that, why do you need me?"

I Dream of Jeannie

Well, l need you to expose him.

"Well, l need you to expose him."

I Dream of Jeannie

You see, there's one trick that he does that l can't explain.

"You see, there's one trick that he does that l can't explain."

I Dream of Jeannie

He floats in the air.

"He floats in the air."

I Dream of Jeannie

-Floats in the air! -Yes.

"-Floats in the air! -Yes."

I Dream of Jeannie

He calls it the old levitation trick.

"He calls it the old levitation trick."

I Dream of Jeannie

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