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Clips from The Great North - From Tusk Til Dawn Adventure (S02E02)

"Ah, here we go."
The Great North
"I was thinking of having a bachelor party."
The Great North
"Sweet!"
The Great North
"And I was hoping that maybe you could throw it for me."
The Great North
"Something simple, like on your boat."
The Great North
"I sold mine after I got sober."
The Great North
"Needed the money for a family car."
The Great North
"Before that, I was just renting the boat out"
The Great North
"for porno shoots anyway."
The Great North
"If you've seen a porno, it's probably been shot on my boat."
The Great North
"- Go ahead, name a porn. - I'd rather not."
The Great North
"Yup, shot on my boat. Name another."
The Great North
"- No, sir. - Also shot on my boat. Name another."
The Great North
"- This is so fun. - Yup, parts one and two."
The Great North
"- I feel uncomfortable. - Again, shot on my boat."
The Great North
"- What's a porno? - That one, too. Very educational."
The Great North
"Orgy Ahoy?"
The Great North
"That was shot on a soundstage, believe it or not."
The Great North
"Uh, Wolf, can I speak to you out on the porch for just a moment?"
The Great North
"If you want to talk wedding gifts for Tusk and Doris,"
The Great North
"I know for a fact that they adore cigarettes."
The Great North
"Wolf, we cannot throw that man a bachelor party on our boat."
The Great North
"I don't trust him."
The Great North
"But you just said you'd give him a second chance, Dad,"
The Great North
"and if you say it, you got to mean it."
The Great North
"Remember you always used to think that the checkout lady"
The Great North
"at the grocery store, Connie,"
The Great North
"would always manhandle your bread?"
The Great North
"But then you tried self-checkout,"
The Great North
"and what happened?"
The Great North
"I dropped and then stepped on my bread."
The Great North
"That's right. You dropped it and you stepped on it,"
The Great North
"and Connie came over and gave you new bread,"
The Great North
"and you gave her a second chance,"
The Great North
"and your bread's been A-OK ever since."
The Great North
"My point is,"
The Great North
"sometimes you got to give people an opportunity to be better,"
The Great North
"a real second chance."
The Great North
"Fine, let's throw a bachelor party on our boat"
The Great North
"for a man that almost murdered you."
The Great North
"That's the stuff."
The Great North
"Now, what do you say, father-son forgiveness snuggle?"
The Great North
"Bring it in, Dad."
The Great North
"Tusk, will you make me the happiest man in the world"
The Great North
"and have your bachelor party on our boat?"
The Great North
"Yes! Oh, thank you so much."
The Great North
"Me, Doris, and Adonis won't forget this."
The Great North
"Yeah, we're naming it Adonis, boy or girl."
The Great North
"If it's a girl, Adonis Rebecca. If it's a boy, Adonis Mike."
The Great North
"How's party planning going, babe?"
The Great North
"Well, I've already got"
The Great North
"me, Dad, Jerry, Moon, Ham, and Crispin."
The Great North
"Doesn't Tusk have any friends of his own?"
The Great North
"I guess there's his old sidekick Dan."
The Great North
"The guy he used to make do"
The Great North
"all the dangerous stunts on his show?"
The Great North
"Yeah,"
The Great North
"but Dad and I are pretty sure he's dead,"
The Great North
"so that's probably a touchy subject."
The Great North
"But enough about Tusk's party. I'm so excited for you"
The Great North
"to compete in the kiosk competition."
The Great North
"Just remember, if it gets down to the wire,"
The Great North
"try the tortoise move."
The Great North
"You just shout, "Hey, look, a tortoise!""
The Great North
"Then watch your competitor's concentration shatter,"
The Great North
"because who wouldn't want to see a tortoise?"
The Great North
"And you've actually tried this?"
The Great North
"Thought of it just now, but, trust me, it's solid."
The Great North
"Hey, it's the man of the hour."
The Great North
"Welcome to bach-town, baby. you."
The Great North
"And the rest of us, so, uh, like, seven people."
The Great North
"This looks great, Wolf. All my favorite buds are here."
The Great North
"You, your dad, your child brothers,"
The Great North
"this guy..."
The Great North
"Hey, I'm Jerry, and I have no idea who you are either."
The Great North
"I just know I'm not supposed to trust you."
The Great North
"Easy, Jerry. Where'd you hear that?"
The Great North
"I'm bad at lying. He heard that from me."
The Great North
"That's fair. Jerry, truth is, I used to be a bit of a bad seed,"
The Great North
"and now I'm trying to be a good tree,"
The Great North
"but trust is earned, not given."
The Great North
"All right, time to pull up anchor and set sail."
The Great North
"If this boat's a-moving, Tusk's party is grooving."
The Great North
"Wait. Wait up."
The Great North
"I'm looking for Tusk Johnson's bachelor party?"
The Great North
"- Well, split my wood."
The Great North
"Oh, my God. It's Tusk's old sidekick Dan."
The Great North
"Dan, great to see you and tell you face-to-face,"
The Great North
"I'm sorry I let you take the fall on that bogus land deal."
The Great North
"I was a different person back then."
The Great North
"Oh, no biggie. Jail wasn't all bad."
The Great North
"I had a job in the prison cafeteria,"
The Great North
"so I got to put extra oatmeal in my pockets."
The Great North
"When you didn't respond to my Evite,"
The Great North
"I figured you weren't coming."
The Great North
"Well, I-I mean, I guess I was mad at you"
The Great North
"when I was in jail, but I'm out,"
The Great North
"and I can eat sour cream and onion chips whenever I want,"
The Great North
"so my life is perfect now, and all is forgiven."
The Great North
"Would you look at that?"
The Great North
"Two of my best friends being best friends again."
The Great North
"I mean, I know I just met you, Dan,"
The Great North
"but I got a great feeling about it."
The Great North
"Now, let me walk everyone through tonight's P-plan."
The Great North
"That's short for party plan. We got a snow cone machine,"
The Great North
"a banging bag of chips, a cake by Ham..."
The Great North
"With a special Tusk Johnson surprise on the inside."
The Great North
"If it's a puppy, I will be so excited."
The Great North
"We've also got the Ship-N-Slide inflatable for Moon,"
The Great North
"and to cap off the evening,"
The Great North
"a sweet-ass laser light dubstep show that, believe it or not,"
The Great North
"I found on Craigslist."
The Great North
"- I believe it. - But, right now,"
The Great North
"who's ready for Lone Moose's number one"
The Great North
"nautical-themed a cappella group?"
The Great North
"Hi, I'm Captain Randy, and we're"
The Great North
"the New Kids on the Dock. Two, three, four..."
The Great North
"♪ What a boat, what a boat, what a boat ♪"
The Great North
"What a mighty good boat... ♪"
The Great North
"I guess it's official,"
The Great North
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