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Clips from Veep - B/ill (S04E04)

"- Hey, Gary. How you doing? - Good. Good. Good."
Veep
"He's not... This isn't yours?"
Veep
"- He's my nephew. - Cute, I imagine."
Veep
"I'll tell you what, kid. Here's a Jackson."
Veep
"Go get yourself 10 sodas and you never saw us."
Veep
"Or just water. Just choose water."
Veep
"- Wow, this is weird, huh? - Mm."
Veep
"It's been a long time since I've seen you guys. Wow."
Veep
"Did you see those pictures that I sent you?"
Veep
"No, I didn't, Gary. And why the fuck are we here?"
Veep
"Okay, easy, easy. It's anonymous."
Veep
"Just pretend like you're parents checking this place out."
Veep
"- Paint something. - I don't even paint my own nails, Gary."
Veep
"A Vietnamese lady does that."
Veep
"Talk or we leave."
Veep
"It's the Families First Bill."
Veep
"It's a difficult time for the president."
Veep
"Gary, I am very good at my job,"
Veep
"and even I can't get people to vote for that heap of mystery meat."
Veep
"It's not that. It's the opposite. She wants it to go away."
Veep
"So Selina needs to lose the vote"
Veep
"and you want us to lobby members of Congress under the wire."
Veep
"I am so glad I left. She has gone full Colonel Kurtz."
Veep
"Is she giving orders from under the desk?"
Veep
"She doesn't even know about this, all right?"
Veep
"And she's not gonna know about this."
Veep
"Okay, well, in that case, I'm gonna say yes to this,"
Veep
"- but for one reason only. - Loyalty?"
Veep
"- Money. - Can't you just do this for Selina?"
Veep
"- No. - Okay, well, I can't authorize that."
Veep
"Well, get Ben to."
Veep
"How'd you know Ben was involved?"
Veep
"- Okay. - Because he's not."
Veep
"- Right. - This is getting completely out of hand."
Veep
"No, no, it isn't."
Veep
"We just accepted your proposal"
Veep
"and we'll be in touch with the figures."
Veep
"Okay, all right. Thank you."
Veep
"No, no, no. You want to blow our cover?"
Veep
"Nobody shakes hands in a craft shop."
Veep
"You know, at least three of these kids are probably mine."
Veep
"Okay."
Veep
"A big day for President Meyer"
Veep
"as her beleaguered Families First Bill"
Veep
"faces the final vote."
Veep
"- What are you doing? - What?"
Veep
"Why are the flowers in front of it?"
Veep
"I can't see it if the flowers are there."
Veep
"- Ugh, God. - Oh, God."
Veep
"No, no, let me get that, you sweet little invalid."
Veep
"I'm not an invalid. I'm completely fine."
Veep
"- These are empty. - I don't know how I got this."
Veep
"From meeting people, I guess."
Veep
"God, Gary, I wish to Jesus that you had gotten this flu instead of me."
Veep
"Oh, my God, me, too. Me, too."
Veep
"All right, here we go."
Veep
"- Put it right there. - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa."
Veep
"She needs to nap. She needs to nap."
Veep
"And that is a Gary Walsh executive order."
Veep
"- Duly noted. - Gary, I'm completely fine, okay?"
Veep
"I'm just working from home today. My God."
Veep
"Okay, coast is clear."
Veep
"211 are voting against the bill."
Veep
"Five undecided. And we've got three yeses"
Veep
"that we're working on turning around into nos."
Veep
"So defeat is within our grasp."
Veep
"- Ma'am. - Yes?"
Veep
"Here's an iPad with that voice memo app I like."
Veep
"There's also a cool tile game on here if you want to play a game."
Veep
"- A what? A tile? - Which, of course, you don't want to play."
Veep
"Is that Families First?"
Veep
"Yeah, it's really close, but we're doing our best to lose it."
Veep
"Can I just restate how difficult me knowing this makes my job?"
Veep
"Which is already extremely difficult."
Veep
"We have to lose the vote to have a chance of winning the election."
Veep
"We kill the bill, we end the criticism."
Veep
"I'm the press secretary."
Veep
"What I don't know, I can't lie about."
Veep
"Including this, whatever this is."
Veep
"You don't need to lie about this."
Veep
"We're asking people to vote yes."
Veep
"We're doing what we should be doing. We're just doing it badly."
Veep
"- Oh! - Bless you."
Veep
"I think I just sneezed up part of my pancreas."
Veep
"Don't worry, Mike. We have a team of our worst people on this."
Veep
"Cazzelli, Lennox. The usual saps. Jonah, Richard."
Veep
"I didn't hear any of this because the acoustics are so bad."
Veep
"Sue, this is a test memo."
Veep
"Send memo."
Veep
"- What is this? - It's a footstool."
Veep
"Oh, yeah, I feel so much better."
Veep
"Sir, this is a great bill."
Veep
"And sometimes it takes a great man to see greatness."
Veep
"Are you a great man?"
Veep
"Title four, section seven"
Veep
"negates the entire point of the legislation."
Veep
"How did they write this thing?"
Veep
"Get drunk and tape crayons to their feet?"
Veep
"Well, what if I told you that was gone?"
Veep
"But it isn't gone, is it?"
Veep
"- No, sir, it's still there. - But what if it was gone?"
Veep
"- Oh, that's a good point. - Thank you."
Veep
"So you're the best the White House has to offer?"
Veep
"- Yes, sir. - Two giant children in their dads' suits."
Veep
"Uh, sir, we have a folder full of numbers here,"
Veep
"and I think you'll find these numbers"
Veep
"just to be great, great numbers."
Veep
"Saying what?"
Veep
"- Uh, Richard, what do the numbers say? - You haven't read the numbers."
Veep
"We've glanced at the numbers, sir, and at first glance they are very compelling."
Veep
"- You know where the door is. - Sir, if there's anything..."
Veep
"Oh, wait. You work for President Meyer."
Veep
"You don't know where the door is. I'll show you."
Veep
"- It's over here. - Sir, you may or may not know"
Veep
"that I ran a multimillion-dollar website."
Veep
"So if I can offer any web design or support..."
Veep
"Sir, can I ask you how you're going to vote today?"
Veep
"No. - Is that no as in I can't ask you or no as in..."
Veep
"Hey, Sue, have you seen my bag?"
Veep
"Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's going on?"
Veep
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