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Clips from Disenchantment - The Good, The Bad, and the Bum-Bum (S04E04)

"Anyways, we met-cute on the outskirts of Ogreland."
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"Me driving my candy wagon,"
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"her just coming back from shopping."
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"It was love at first sight…"
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"[sniffs]"
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"[Pops] …for one of us."
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"[panting]"
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"[whimpers]"
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"But us elves don't ever give up."
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"Except for Quito. That's all he ever did!"
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"[grunting]"
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"But Stabo got him. He got him good."
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"-Pops-- -But like I was saying…"
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"Me and Barko waited every day with a different candy."
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"[sniffs]"
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"[Pops] But no luck."
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"[whimpers]"
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"[Pops] Then I hit on it."
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"It weren't me, it were the candy."
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"Ogres don't dig sweets."
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"So, I whipped up a special flavor just for her."
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"Sour it was. Just enough to give your mouth a pucker."
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"[sniffs] Ah…"
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"[Pops] Pucker up, we did."
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"[kisses]"
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"Oh, Grogda!"
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"Oh, Young Pops!"
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"[Pops] From that day on, I was her candy man."
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"We kept things on the down low 'cause her parents wouldn't approve."
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"Turns out, neither did her cuss-ugly boyfriend."
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"[grunts]"
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"Well, sir, you'll never guess what happened next."
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"[chuckles]"
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"Oh, yeah!"
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"[scoffs] Please, skip ahead."
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"What are you, a prude? You don't like to think about…"
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"-[grunting] -Oh…"
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"[vocalizing]"
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"Oh, my God."
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"-[vocalizing] -[groaning] Pops!"
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"Well, well, what's it say?"
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"-A blue line. -Holy moly!"
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"Either you're pregnant or that candy cane is rotten."
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"[Pops] We knew there was no future for us in Ogreland except for death."
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"So, we waited till nightfall."
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"Then, I gave the signal."
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"-[vocalizes] -[Elfo] Ugh!"
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"Oh!"
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"[barking]"
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"[howling]"
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"[dramatic music playing]"
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"[cranking]"
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"-[blades sputtering] -[Luci vocalizes]"
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"Look at him go."
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"Oh! [laughs]"
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"Glad that ain't me."
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"[Pops] I couldn't bring Grogda to Elfwood,"
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"and we sure as heck couldn't go back to Ogreland."
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"So, we made a happy home with the flies"
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"and the mosquitoes and the scorpions of the jungle."
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"[crickets chirping]"
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"[birds chirping]"
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"[kisses]"
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"[Pops] We hid in the trees from the most vicious creatures around."
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"[horn blows]"
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"Gnomes!"
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"[all chanting] Hup! Hup! Hup!"
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"[Pops] Oh, she was the love of my life."
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"Had me flying high."
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"[Young Pops vocalizes]"
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"[Pops] It wasn't long after this that you came along."
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"-[pops] -[Elfo crying]"
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"[Grogda] Look at him, Pops."
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"[Young Pops] Yeah, I'll love him, anyway."
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"-[chittering] -[barks]"
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"[Pops] You was a real scamp."
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"Always getting into mischief like your old man."
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"Look at me, Daddy Elfo."
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"[chuckles] That's nice, boy, but my name is Pops."
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"You call me Daddy Elfo again, and I'll slap you on the bum-bum."
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"[Pops] Every time I said that, you shut up but good."
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"Oh, I wanted to name you Scampo"
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"-or Spunko or Spanko or Stinko… -[grunts]"
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"[Pops] …but your mom wouldn't have it."
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"She wanted you to be proud of being part elf."
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"[screams]"
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"-[chittering] -[panting]"
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"[sobbing]"
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"Go on, tell me who you are."
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"Hi, I'm Elfo."
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"[kisses]"
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"-Hi, Elfo. -[Elfo chuckles]"
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"[Grogda] Say it again."
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"-Hi, I'm Elfo. -[Grogda] Again."
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"[giggling] Stop. Stop. Stop!"
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"[angrily] Stop it!"
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"[Grogda singing]"
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"♪ Elfo, my baby, sleep safe in our home ♪"
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"♪ Dream of great battles And murdering gnomes ♪"
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"♪ Life can be scary, life is unfair ♪"
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"♪ When you feel alone Your mom will be there ♪"
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"[dings]"
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"Wow, I'm kind of starting to make sense."
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"Eh, not to me, you ain't."
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"You was always off in your own world, God bless you."
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"Even on that fateful day."
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"[chuckling]"
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"-[monkey chitters] -Huh?"
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"[sniffs]"
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"-[barking] -[chittering]"
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"Hey! That's my diaper, you thief!"
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"[screeching]"
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"[barking]"
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"[Pops] It looked hopeless, but you never gave up."
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"[chittering]"
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"[screeching]"
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"[yelling]"
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"[grunts]"
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"[gasps]"
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"[barking]"
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