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Clips from Flight of the Conchords - The Third Conchord (S01E01)

"- I mean... no. - What? Is he fired or not?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Well, you see, while I had him in a headlock,"
Flight of the Conchords
"he sort of explained why he thought you shouldn't be in the band."
Flight of the Conchords
"And after a while it kind of made sense."
Flight of the Conchords
"You were only over there for like 20 seconds."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, after about 20 seconds it kind of made sense."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's hard to fire a guy who's in a headlock."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's easy for me to fire you, Bret, because you're my friend."
Flight of the Conchords
"- So what are you saying? - You're fired, Bret."
Flight of the Conchords
"- I'm fired? - Yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"- But you can't do that... - Listen, we'll talk about it later."
Flight of the Conchords
"I've gotta go to band practice now."
Flight of the Conchords
"Todd's very strict."
Flight of the Conchords
"Flup!"
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay, man. More enthusiasm this time, all right?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- It's "The Doggy Bounce." - Todd, how about you"
Flight of the Conchords
"get down on all fours and wag your tail like you just can't fail"
Flight of the Conchords
"and I'll just play bass, huh?"
Flight of the Conchords
"What? It's "The Doggy Bounce.""
Flight of the Conchords
"You have to do "The Doggy Bounce" bounce."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's a phenomena."
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay? Now, let's count this shit off."
Flight of the Conchords
"One, two, one, two, three, four."
Flight of the Conchords
"# Arf arf #"
Flight of the Conchords
"- # Do the doggy bounce # - # Arf arf #"
Flight of the Conchords
"# You know you want to do it #"
Flight of the Conchords
"- # Arf arf... # - Don't point at me."
Flight of the Conchords
"Stop stop stop stop. Bret, what are you doing?"
Flight of the Conchords
"There is no guitar in this song, all right?"
Flight of the Conchords
"There's no guitar, okay?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Not just a little bit, or... - No, not even a little bit."
Flight of the Conchords
"None at all. All right?"
Flight of the Conchords
"One, two, one, two, three, four."
Flight of the Conchords
"# Arf arf, do the doggy bounce #"
Flight of the Conchords
"# Arf arf... #"
Flight of the Conchords
"Hold on, hold on."
Flight of the Conchords
"Bret, what are you doing?"
Flight of the Conchords
"I'm not Gloria Estefan, all right?"
Flight of the Conchords
"One percussionist is fine, all right?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- So don't do that. - Okay."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Thank you. Thank you. - Sure."
Flight of the Conchords
"Todd, I don't like this kind of music."
Flight of the Conchords
"Oh, you don't like this kind of music?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- I didn't know that. - It's stupid dance music."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's not about the music. You know what it's about?"
Flight of the Conchords
"# The pussy! #"
Flight of the Conchords
"- Am I right? - Yeah, obviously you're right, yeah."
Flight of the Conchords
"- So why do you care about the music? - Well..."
Flight of the Conchords
"Do you guys need to borrow my amp?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Bret, you're pathetic, man. We don't need a roadie, okay?"
Flight of the Conchords
"- I could carry your bongos. - My what?"
Flight of the Conchords
"No one's touching my bongos. You know that."
Flight of the Conchords
"Do you need someone to carry your guitar, Jemaine?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Well, I don't really need you to, Bret."
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay."
Flight of the Conchords
"I get it."
Flight of the Conchords
"Not needed."
Flight of the Conchords
"You know what? We got to rock out "The Doggy Bounce" this Saturday night."
Flight of the Conchords
"- It's not ready. - It's totally ready."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's not ready, Todd."
Flight of the Conchords
"All right, you're right. Let's get it perfect."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, let's get it perfect and then we'll maybe do it another time."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Yeah, am I right? - Yes."
Flight of the Conchords
"Two of you? But that's going backwards."
Flight of the Conchords
"I thought we had a proper three-person band."
Flight of the Conchords
"That's what you agreed on."
Flight of the Conchords
"Jemaine and Todd, they fired me."
Flight of the Conchords
"So I started a new band. This is Demetri."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Hey. - I met him running."
Flight of the Conchords
"Look, I don't think Jemaine can fire you."
Flight of the Conchords
"They need my authorization, don't you?"
Flight of the Conchords
"It's too late."
Flight of the Conchords
"I'm pretty sure you need my authorization for firing and hiring."
Flight of the Conchords
"Don't you think? I mean, what am I doing?"
Flight of the Conchords
"I'll check on that."
Flight of the Conchords
""Authorization needed..."
Flight of the Conchords
"Bret kicked out... question mark.""
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay."
Flight of the Conchords
"So, Demetri, what exactly is this thing?"
Flight of the Conchords
"It's a guitboard."
Flight of the Conchords
"No, man, keytar. Keytar."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, he took the wrong parts of the words."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's half keyboard and half guitar."
Flight of the Conchords
"So is a guitar or a keyboard?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Exactly. It's the best of both worlds."
Flight of the Conchords
"So it starts out as a keyboard and ends kind of as a guitar."
Flight of the Conchords
"I don't like it. It's weird."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's not the right shape."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Play him something. - Sure."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Could you hold that please? - Mm-hmm."
Flight of the Conchords
"No, don't like it."
Flight of the Conchords
"Ugh, no. Weird."
Flight of the Conchords
"Oh, that bit's good."
Flight of the Conchords
"Who's this?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Oh, here we go. The Fonzies have arrived."
Flight of the Conchords
"This is Demetri. This is my new band."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Good luck. - Oh great."
Flight of the Conchords
"Another awkward situation."
Flight of the Conchords
"So what's your band going to be called, Bret?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Can't be called Flight of the Conchords, that's our name."
Flight of the Conchords
"It's not. It's called the Original Flight of the Conchords."
Flight of the Conchords
"You guys can be called Flight of the Condors, or whatever."
Flight of the Conchords
"We're gonna be the Crazy Dogggz."
Flight of the Conchords
"Shut up, Todd."
Flight of the Conchords
"Don't tell me to shut up in front of people."
Flight of the Conchords
"Well, don't say what out name's gonna be. We haven't discussed it."
Flight of the Conchords
"Okay, Jemaine, Bret. Can I have a quiet word?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Sure. Come on, Demetri."
Flight of the Conchords
"No no, private."
Flight of the Conchords
"I'm just gonna play some more."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Stop talking. - What do you play, the leather jacket?"
Flight of the Conchords
"I play the bongos, man."
Flight of the Conchords
"What the hell's going on, guys?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Why did you fire Bret, Jemaine?"
Flight of the Conchords
"Well, I was trying to fire Todd but he did a sad face at me."
Flight of the Conchords
"I don't know if you can fire Bret."
Flight of the Conchords
"You're equal band members. It's got to come from a higher authority."
Flight of the Conchords
"- Are you sure? - Ye... no."
Flight of the Conchords
"I'll have to check, but it doesn't sound right."
Flight of the Conchords
"Yeah, I told him he couldn't fire me."
Flight of the Conchords
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