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Clips from Flight of the Conchords - The Third Conchord (S01E01)

"Well, needless to say,"
Flight of the Conchords
"people are still talking about me in Barcelona."
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"I bet they are."
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"- Yeah. - Oh, hey, guys. Come in."
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"Good timing."
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"All right, let's get started."
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"Band meeting, Jemaine."
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"- Yes. - Bret?"
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"- Yeah. - Murray, present."
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"- And Todd. - Present."
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"Good, very professional."
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"Murray, who's this guy?"
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"- Eh? - Who's this guy that's on my chair?"
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"I'm getting to that, Jemaine, all right?"
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"That's in the agenda under Todd."
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"All right? Just stop jumping the gun."
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"You're always trying to get ahead of things."
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"Item one: Todd. He's the new band member."
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"Hi."
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"Okay, item two,"
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"interview with "Rolling Stones.""
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"Now I wasn't sure whether that was"
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"the magazine or the band."
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"I've heard from both, I've got a no from the band..."
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"Murray, what do you mean new band member?"
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"Well, that's item one."
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"What are you talking about, Bret? We're on to item two now,"
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""interview confusion." Do you want me to go back to item one?"
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"- Yeah, go back to item one. - Yeah? Okay."
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"Item one: Todd."
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"- Yeah, he's the new band member. - Hi."
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"- Hi. - Right. Item two..."
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"I didn't know we were looking for a new band member."
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"Well, we weren't, Bret. But then I just found one."
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"Todd, just show them what you showed me yesterday at the dentist."
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"Sure."
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"Whoa!"
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"Even better than yesterday. You could see all the details"
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"when your fingers bounce off the skins."
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"Pigskin, is it? Really good."
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"I'll just tell you straight up"
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"that all I'm really interested in is kicking some grooves,"
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"banging some tunes,"
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"I don't know, just basically getting it on."
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"Let me just get that down."
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"- Getting down. - Murray."
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"Can we have a private band meeting, please?"
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"Private band meeting?"
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"Yeah, can we go somewhere else and have a private band meeting?"
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"Okay, all right, sure."
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"Come on, Todd, we're having a private band meeting."
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"No, I mean without Todd."
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"Murray, what's this? We turn up and there's"
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"some other guy in the band apparently."
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"- Yeah, what? - You know, we've got to discuss it."
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"This is a decision I made as a band manager, all right?"
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"You guys have got to trust me sometimes."
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"- Sometimes I have good ideas. - When?"
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"Like that time I saw you for the first time onstage."
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"I said "Face the front," and you did."
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"We've never looked back since, have we?"
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"- Still not sure about that. - You've got to go in there"
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"and you've got to tell Todd he's not in the band."
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"It's too late, Jemaine, all right?"
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"I think I promised him."
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"I'd just been given nitrous oxide."
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"I was at the dentist. I didn't know what I was talking about."
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"I think I'm going to his brother's wedding."
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"All I want you guys to do is just give him a chance, all right?"
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"- He knows his stuff. - Murray, we don't need a bongo player."
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"- Have you seen him on the bongos? - Yes."
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"Yeah? Is he any good?"
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"Of course he's good. He's great!"
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"- Isn't he? Is he? - He's all right."
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"- He's okay. - Yeah, well, you can say that again."
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"And now there's three of you in a band."
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"You're like a proper band. You're like The Policemen."
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"Yeah, but you can't add members to our band willy-nilly."
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"Look, guys, I had to. No one else was gonna do it."
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"You guys weren't gonna come up with that idea, were you?"
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"Murray, I'm on a..."
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"call here with the Secretary of State."
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"Could you... how much longer are you gonna be?"
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"Oh, not much longer, Greg. Sorry. Okay?"
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"Look, all I want you to do is give Todd a chance."
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"- Like the song. - Which song?"
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"The John Lennon one, you know."
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"- "Give Peace a Chance." - Give Pete a Chance."
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"Okay?"
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"- Peace. - Yeah."
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"Good, well..."
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"- Wow. - Yeah."
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"But, um, not every song"
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"should end with a bongo solo."
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"- Sure, no problem. - Is that cool?"
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"- Maybe he could... - Maybe just a little solo..."
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"- You could start off with... ...in the middle."
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"Yeah, and we'll have a little solo in the middle."
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"Great. Hey, you know what?"
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"Can we try a song that I wrote real quick?"
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"- Mm-hmm. - No."
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"All you guys'll do, you'll put your guitars and bass down"
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"and you just go, "Arf arf!""
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"In the background, like dogs."
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"Like bad dogs. Arf, arf!"
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"- Mmm, I don't... - You get to dance and go "Arf, arf""
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"- while I'm playing. Arf arf. - I'm not sure about one."
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"- You don't like dancing? - I like dancing, I just..."
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"You don't... you don't like dancing."
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"- I dance all the time. - Really?"
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"Yeah, I dance at parties."
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"I dance when I'm angry. I dance..."
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"When you're angry? Who dances when they're angry?"
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"I guess that's about it."
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"I've never seen you dance when you're angry."
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"Guys! Focus, guys."
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"Well, I dance often."
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"Let's kick into this one. Am I right?"
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"Arf, arf!"
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"Uh, the thing is,"
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