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Clips from The Mighty Boosh - Mutants (S01E01)

"Hi. Welcome to the show. I'm Howard Moon, this is Vince Noir."
The Mighty Boosh
"All right."
The Mighty Boosh
"This week we're dealing with immortality."
The Mighty Boosh
"Can a man live on after his death?"
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"I'd like to think I will be remembered many years after my own death."
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"- What for? - For the things I say and do."
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"Like what? ''Have you seen my light blue trousers? Can I have a crisp?''"
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"There are many things I do that you don't know about."
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"Really. What things?"
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"Once a month one euro goes out of my account straight into a charity."
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"Direct debit. Whoosh."
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"- That's how you'll be remembered? - Yes."
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"- For euro generosity? - I don't need to be remembered"
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"- cos I'll be in the future. - How?"
The Mighty Boosh
"Cryogenics. Are you aware of cryogenics?"
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"- l've heard people say it. - I'll have my head frozen cryogenically"
The Mighty Boosh
"and put in a jar, and 12,000 years from now they'll revivify me"
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"and I'll be the head in a jar."
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"They'll wheel me out at ceremonies, consult me like an oracle."
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"Why not get your whole body frozen?"
The Mighty Boosh
"It's not the way it works in the future,"
The Mighty Boosh
"it's just heads, floating about at ceremonies."
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"Well, I'm gonna get my hair frozen. lmagine that."
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"Then future generations can get it out and look at it"
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"- and see what's possible. - Where are my light blue trousers?"
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"- I gave them to Leroy. - What for?"
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"He took a shine to 'em."
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"Don't give my trousers to people."
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"- lf you've got a problem, see Leroy. - I'm going to."
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"- Go on then. - Leroy!"
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"Welcome to the show."
The Mighty Boosh
"..to the world of The Mighty Boosh."
The Mighty Boosh
"# Come with us to The Mighty Boosh # The Mighty Boosh"
The Mighty Boosh
"# Come with us to The Mighty Boosh #"
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"(Whistling cheerfully)"
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"(Glass smashes)"
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"(Thunder crashes)"
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"(Door creaks)"
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"(Yells)"
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"Welcome to the Zooniverse, where all your dreams come true...niverse."
The Mighty Boosh
"I'm general manager Bob Fossil, and I'm a human."
The Mighty Boosh
"Now, our first stop today on the tour is the largest animal in the zoo,"
The Mighty Boosh
"the Grey Leg-Face Man."
The Mighty Boosh
"- What? - You know, the Grey Leg-Face."
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"He's got legs, and another leg on his face."
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"The elephant."
The Mighty Boosh
"Well, yeah, if you want to get technical, Mr Smarty-Pants."
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"There he is, over there."
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"- I can't see him. - Well, he's camouflaged."
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"He's adapting to his natural environment."
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"Look! There he went! Oh, my God, you just missed him."
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"- Boy, he's fast. - Why aren't there any animals here?"
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"Well...why are you people so small?"
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"Huh?! I could rest my drinks on your head!"
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"l want my mummy."
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"Hey, let's sing a song, huh?"
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"# Nicey nicey zoo zoo for him and her and me and you #"
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"Everybody! # Nicey nicey zoo zoo"
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"# For him and her and me and you"
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"# Nicey nicey zoo zoo for him and her and me and you"
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"# Nicey nicey zoo zoo... #"
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"Whoa!"
The Mighty Boosh
"Chin up."
The Mighty Boosh
"Nice."
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"- Hey. - Hey, Howard."
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"- What you up to? - I'm doing Bollo's portrait."
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"- I'm doing him as Caesar. - Nice, nice."
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"- You can do me next. - I can't really do people."
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"Yeah but my face is a gift to any portrait artist."
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"- Could be difficult. - Do me as a Greek god, fighter pilot."
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"It's just you're a bit generic looking."
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"How dare you? What are you saying about my face?"
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"l...I didn't mean that in a bad way."
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"- How did you mean it? - It's good to be generic."
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"- How? - Spying."
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"- Spying? - Look..."
The Mighty Boosh
"all I'm saying is look at Bollo. Look at his face - all the lines."
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"Look at his weather-beaten mush - the years in the jungle, the circus,"
The Mighty Boosh
"that chat show he hosted - it's all there."
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"You haven't done anything. Your head's like a man's thigh."
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"What?! You can have too much going on in your face, you know."
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"All a bit too busy. All the features jostling for position."
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"Yeah? The eyes screaming out, the nose."
The Mighty Boosh
"It's very visually noisy, your face."
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"- Visually noisy? - A brass band under a wig..."
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"- marching towards me every day. - Look at your face. It's ambient."
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"- It's like The Orb's third album. - Take that back."
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"- I'm just saying, get some accessories. - What?"
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"Bring your face out - get a pipe, a pink cowboy hat."
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"Bring my face out? I should knock yours back."
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"- (Grunts) - All right."
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"- (Grunting) - Easy."
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"- It's all right, Bollo. - I don't need accessories."
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"I'm Howard Moon - the man, the myth, the maverick."
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"- Hi, Vince. - Hey, Mrs Gideon."
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"- Have you seen my python? - No."
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"Only he's not in his cage and I thought maybe he was here."
The Mighty Boosh
"- Hi, Bollo. - Quite slippery characters, snakes, eh?"
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"That's a popular misconception - snakes are dry."
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"Anyway, if you see him, his name's Tony."
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"All right, cool, I'll bring him round."
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"- I didn't know you were a painter. - l've got a BTEC National."
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"- I could do your portrait. - Yeah, maybe."
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"You're head of reptiles, yeah?"
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"I'd probably do you as Medusa."
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"Oh, that sounds good."
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"- You can't do people. - I'm branching out."
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"- Are you? - Who are you?"
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"Howard. Howard Moon. I work here."
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"- You're new. - No, l've worked here for ten years."
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"- Part time. - Full time."
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"I see you every day, Mrs Gideon. It's me, Howard, crazy Howard."
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"- OK. - I'll keep an eye out for the snake."
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"You know, if I see it I'll let you know."
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"I love snakes. Real big fan of the snake, you know. Yeah..."
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"- You're scared of snakes. - l've got great stories about snakes."
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"One got out, went down the street, went AWOL, ended up in a launderette,"
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"got into one of the driers and when they got him out it was small."
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"Really small, the whole..."
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"Anyway, if you see Tony you let me know."
The Mighty Boosh
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