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Clips from The Monkees - The Chaperone (S01E01)

"Just staring back in silent gloom."
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"That's not where you belong"
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"Come with me I'll take you where the tast of life is green"
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"And everyday holds wonders to be seen."
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"Come with me, leave yesterday behind"
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"And take a giant step outside your mind."
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"Come with me I'll take you where the tast of life is green"
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"And everyday holds wonders to be seen."
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"Come with me, leave yesterday behind"
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"And take a giant step outside your mind."
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"Thank you, my dear."
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"Oh! Heh heh. My late husband won a ribbon"
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"like this for doing something to help shorten the war."
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"Oh? What did he do?"
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"He deserted."
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"I've had it. I'm through!"
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"Oh, man, keep your dress on. What's the matter?"
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"He's getting fresh!"
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"Okay, so he's getting fresh. It's for a pal, anyway."
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"Davy's in love with his daughter."
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"Yeah, and I'm gonna be his mother-in-law."
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"If you play your cards right."
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"Oh, here he comes."
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"Excuse me."
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"Uh, where's she going?"
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"I give up, where?"
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"- Come on, Mike. - What?"
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"We've got to get him out of there."
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"Okay."
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"Come on."
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"Excuse me."
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"Hm?"
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"- Come on, Micky. - He's still out there."
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"Ah, there you are, ha ha ha."
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"Oh, the door. Must answer the door."
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"Can't keep someone standing at the door, heh heh. Ah."
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"Who was that?"
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"Uh, nobody, nobody."
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"I brought my own pretzels, and... hi,"
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"I'm the boys' landlord. The name is Babbit."
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"Uh, Harley Vandenberg. This is Mrs. Arcadian, the chaperone."
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"- Uh-huh. - Charmed."
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"Would you mind getting us both some drinks?"
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"Tell me, ha ha ha, how much you getting for this?"
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"You know, if I knew you were coming, I'd have paid them."
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"Oh, you sweet man."
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"Say, tell me, uh, how do you, how do you like this apartment?"
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"You know, I could kick the boys out."
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"Oh, I couldn't stand living in a place like this, heh."
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"And you really wouldn't want to do that to the boys."
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"Why, they think the world of you."
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"Well, they were just talking about you before you came in."
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"Really?"
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"Yes. What's a bloodsucker?"
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"Mrs. Arcadian sounds like a really strange woman."
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"She ought to be; she's my roommate, Micky."
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"What?"
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"Yeah. Our regular chaperone conked out, so Micky had to take her place."
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"All night long, my father's been..."
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"Ha ha ha ha!"
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"Ha ha ha ha!"
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"You. Ten-hut. Right face. Your other right, knucklehead."
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"Forward march. Hup, two, three, four. Hup, two, three, four."
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"Hup, halt, one, two. Ten-hut."
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"You two, fall in."
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"Unscramble... march."
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"Hup, two, three, four. Hup, two, three, four."
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"Halt, one, two. Parade rest. And stay there."
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"What's going on? What's happening?"
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"Hup, two, three, four. Hup, two, three, four."
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"Hey."
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"Hup, two, three, four. Hup, two, three, four. Hup, two, three, four."
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"Hey."
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"- Hup, two, three, four. - I think something is wrong."
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"Hup, two, three, four. Hup, two, three, four."
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"Hup, two, three, four."
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"You don't have to go."
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"Hup, two, three, four."
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"Bye."
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"Hup, two, three, four. Hup, two, three, four."
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"Hup, two, three, four."
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"Uh, is anything the matter, Mr. Vandenberg?"
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"Oh, no, no. There's nothing the matter."
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"On the contrary, everything's wonderful."
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"I want you to be the first to know Mrs. Arcadian has just consented to be my wife."
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"Oh."
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"Huh? Oh, Harley, heh. I think we can be good friends."
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"Oh, we'll honeymoon in Madrid, then fly to Rome, then on to Venice."
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"Hey, Micky, will you please tell him?"
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"Did you say Venice?"
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"O sole mio!"
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"Micky!"
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"General Vandenberg, look, uh, you don't understand, I, uh, we..."
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"Micky, will you please explain to him and get off the Venice thing?"
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"O sole mio!"
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"Micky!"
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"There's nothing to explain. It's perfectly obvious."
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"You've been laughing at me behind my back."
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"There can be no excuse for this kind of deceit."
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"There is an excuse! You're the excuse! You and your medieval attitudes!"
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"Look what you made these boys go through just because Davy wanted to date me!"
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"How nice of you to come."
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"What is this?"
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"Huntington Hartford hates pickled herring."
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"I think she's got it."
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"By George, she's got it."
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"Tell me when the party begins."
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"If you weren't so over-protective, Davy wouldn't have"
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"had to go to such extremes to see me!"
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"I went back to my apartment, but I couldn't eat,"
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"I couldn't sleep, I couldn't get you out of my mind. Did you dye your hair?"
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"Get outta here."
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"Oh, I don't understand any of this."
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"It's just that I wanted to see your daughter."
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"W-why didn't you say so? I'm not an unreasonable man."
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"Well, I guess all's well that ends well."
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"There's only one thing that bothers me, though."
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"What?"
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"Do I gotta... give back the ring?"
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"Daddy really learned his lesson. He said no more chaperones, ever!"
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