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Clips from Family Guy - La Famiglia Guy (S19E19)

"♪ Is violence in movies and sex on TV ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ But where are those good old‐fashioned values ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ On which we used to rely? ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ Lucky there's a family guy ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ Lucky there's a man who positively can do ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ All the things that make us ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ Laugh and cry ♪"
Family Guy
"♪ He's... a... Fam... ily... Guy! ♪"
Family Guy
"God, can you believe that Trump hung himself in prison?"
Family Guy
"I know! And that Chris Christie lost all that weight."
Family Guy
"He still looks terrible, though."
Family Guy
"(knocking)"
Family Guy
"- Oh, hey, Joe. - Hey, Peter. If you have a sec,"
Family Guy
"there's something I want to talk to you about."
Family Guy
"PETER: Oh, boy, this is it."
Family Guy
"He wants me to have sex with Bonnie."
Family Guy
"Now, remember, Peter, you can't say yes right away."
Family Guy
"You let him talk you into it."
Family Guy
"He's watching for that. It's part of the dance."
Family Guy
"I will absolutely have sex with Bonnie."
Family Guy
"JOE: Sorry, Peter, you're too eager."
Family Guy
"So, I came over to invite you"
Family Guy
"to Susie's christening this weekend."
Family Guy
"- Oh. - And I don't just want you to be a guest."
Family Guy
"I was wondering if you'd be willing to be the godfather."
Family Guy
"- Godfather? - Yeah, you're my best friend,"
Family Guy
"and, well, I'd like you to be Susie's godfather, too."
Family Guy
"- Godfather II? - Wow, you're really warming to this."
Family Guy
"Well, you've made two very compelling arguments."
Family Guy
"Perhaps we should discuss this further in my poorly‐lit den."
Family Guy
"So, about this offer..."
Family Guy
"What are you guys discussing?"
Family Guy
"And when did we get a den?"
Family Guy
"Sorry, Lois, half of being a godfather"
Family Guy
"is closing the door in your wife's face"
Family Guy
"while she wonders what's going on inside."
Family Guy
"But I just wanted to..."
Family Guy
"PETER: I forgot it was a swinging door."
Family Guy
"(bell tolling)"
Family Guy
"(Italian accent): DiGiorno. DiGiorno."
Family Guy
"Joe Paterno."
Family Guy
"DiGiorno."
Family Guy
"Damn it, Peter, being Susie's godfather"
Family Guy
"doesn't mean you're in the mob."
Family Guy
"And you can't bring a cat to church."
Family Guy
"Why not? He's Cat'lic."
Family Guy
"(cat snickering)"
Family Guy
"(giggles) He does a Muttley laugh."
Family Guy
"Where's the priest?"
Family Guy
"Oh, the church ran out of priests months ago,"
Family Guy
"'cause of all the diddlin'."
Family Guy
"Now they just have a rabbi fill in."
Family Guy
"Shalom, everyone."
Family Guy
"Welcome to the christening."
Family Guy
"Now, before the child goes in the water,"
Family Guy
"has it been at least 20 minutes since she ate?"
Family Guy
"- Yes, Rabbi. - Wonderful."
Family Guy
"Then let's dunk this kid like a doughnut."
Family Guy
"I hereby christen this child in the name of Jesus Christ,"
Family Guy
"who was killed by we‐don't‐know‐who,"
Family Guy
"it's not important."
Family Guy
"The last thing we want to do is point fingers..."
Family Guy
"Can you please take my daughter out of the water?"
Family Guy
"Sorry."
Family Guy
"Congratulations, sweetie, you're a Christian."
Family Guy
"From now on, every Sunday you get to eat a hard cookie"
Family Guy
"and pretend it's a guy."
Family Guy
"♪ ♪"
Family Guy
"Coffee in the smallest cup we have, as you requested."
Family Guy
"- Grazie. - And let me assure you,"
Family Guy
"any shouting you hear from the kitchen"
Family Guy
"is not Gordon Ramsay tearing us apart."
Family Guy
"GORDON RAMSAY: Oh, disgusting!"
Family Guy
"‐(dish shatters) ‐Scusi."
Family Guy
"Oh, God, here comes Doug. He just got a race car bed,"
Family Guy
"and now I'm gonna have to hear about it."
Family Guy
"Hey, Stewie. Still sleeping in the slow lane?"
Family Guy
"(forced chuckling) Okay. Okay."
Family Guy
"So, your mom still taking you to the ladies' room"
Family Guy
"- to go pee‐pee? - Actually, yes."
Family Guy
"Yeah, me, too. I don't like the men's room."
Family Guy
"All the urinals are at mouth level."
Family Guy
"I don't look at those. I'm too busy fixing my hair"
Family Guy
"in the mirror... Oh! I'm sorry."
Family Guy
"Ciao, Stewie!"
Family Guy
"God, that was humiliating."
Family Guy
"This party has turned south quick."
Family Guy
"Like Bryan Singer's remake of Casablanca."
Family Guy
"Here's looking at you, actual kid."
Family Guy
"Everyone, I'd like to say a few words."
Family Guy
"Uh, it's a very special day,"
Family Guy
"as we dedicate Susie's life to Christ"
Family Guy
"before she can consent to it"
Family Guy
"or have any conception of what's happening."
Family Guy
"Susie once licked a booger off my hand."
Family Guy
"- I'm Chris, by the way. - Thanks, Chris,"
Family Guy
"but let's wait till we're called upon, bud."
Family Guy
"Anyway, thank you all for coming."
Family Guy
"And to the host."
Family Guy
"Joe, thank you for having us in this restaurant"
Family Guy
"with a painted wall that makes Venice look terrible."
Family Guy
"OTHERS: To Joe!"
Family Guy
"Everyone, enjoy."
Family Guy
"Uh, for the kids, we've got games"
Family Guy
"and also a party princess dressed as Elsa"
Family Guy
"who's clearly a prostitute,"
Family Guy
"but please don't proposition her here,"
Family Guy
"just nod in her direction‐‐ trust me, she'll get it."
Family Guy
"It's her profession."
Family Guy
"Oh, cool, they got a piñata!"
Family Guy
"- Peter, it's for the kids. - Like hell it is."
Family Guy
"I'm the godfather of this event,"
Family Guy
"and I want a debilitating wine‐and‐candy headache."
Family Guy
"Give me that, kid."
Family Guy
"I'm your son, you dick."
Family Guy
"Sir, please, you're making a scene."
Family Guy
"No, I'm not. I can do whatever I want."
Family Guy
"I'm the godfather."
Family Guy
"Uh‐oh."
Family Guy
"I'm‐a so sorry, sir. I didn't know."
Family Guy
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