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Clips from Extras - David Bowie (S02E02)

"Right, Mr Yamaguchi's on his way up now with his lovely wife."
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"As you know he's thinking of investing in us."
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"And if he does, it'll be the best thing that happened to this company"
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"since old Gladys the cook burnt down the canteen."
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"She wasn't a bad cook."
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"Are you having a laugh? Is she having a laugh?"
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"Oh, be fair, Ray. She wasn't that bad. We all loved her milky puddings."
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"Not when they dragged in the mash, we didn't."
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"Now, I don't want you and your team mucking things up for me."
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"You've prepared the traditional Japanese cuisine, have you?"
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"-Yes. It's here. -Right."
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"But I'm still not sure you should have let Gobbler organise"
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"-the traditional Japanese entertainment. -Why? What's he planning?"
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"-Well... -No time. Here they come."
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"Mr Yamaguchi. Hello, hello."
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"-This is Rita and my team. -Hi."
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"We've prepared some traditional Japanese cuisine."
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"Welcome. I hope you like it."
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"-Lovely. -Well done, Rita."
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"And now for your delectation, may I present Gobbler and Kimberley"
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"with some traditional Japanese entertainment."
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"What the... Ooh..."
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"Ching Chang Chinaman milked a cow"
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"Ching Chang Chinaman didn't know how"
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"Ching Chang Chinaman pulled the wrong tit"
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"Ching Chang Chinaman covered in shit!"
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"Oh, I'm all done covered in"
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"Shit"
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"What do you think?"
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"Is he having a raugh?"
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"Ooh!"
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"Tick tock, alarm clock I'm gonna be late"
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"Porridge, toast, kids, car Bloody school gate"
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"Factory floor, what a chore Another week's graft"
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"- And 50 times a day I hear - Are you having a laugh?"
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"Whatever happened to my dreams? Is this the life I chose?"
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"The highlight of my ruddy day is when the whistle blows"
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"When the whistle blows When the whistle blows"
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"When the whistle blows When the whistle blows"
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"It's bad."
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"When the whistle blows"
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"-It's not bad, is it? -It is."
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"No, no. Bad suggests that, you know, it's evil or something. You know, it's not..."
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"It's poor, it's rubbish, you know. It's... It's shit."
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"-It's a shit sitcom. -It's a shit-com."
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"We've sorted that out. Thanks very much."
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"-That's the career over. -That's what one of the reviewers said!"
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"Shouldn't really... No, I shouldn't really joke about it. It's not..."
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"What are reviews like?"
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"If I was being kind, I'd say it was a mixed bag."
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"-Let me have a look. -Really?"
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"Yeah. Let me see them."
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"-Bar? -Yo!"
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"-Can you bring some of the reviews in? -Why has he got them?"
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"Got to do something with his mornings, hasn't he?"
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"-Found another one. -Oh, have you?"
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"Er, "Perhaps it's unfair to judge a sitcom on its first episode,"
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""but when a TV programme makes you want to"
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""gouge out your own eyes rather than watch one more minute,"
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""you know it's probably not your cup of tea.""
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"-Ouch. Go on. Pop it in the scrapbook. -No. Don't pop it in the scrapbook."
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"-Put good ones in the scrapbook. -What... What good ones?"
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"-What, there's no good ones? -Best one was the Telegraph."
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"-What did they say? -They didn't review it."
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"See you later, B."
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"Career's over."
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"Well, no, despite what they say, the viewing figures were really good, 6.2 million."
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"Six million people watched it last night and yet none of these liked it?"
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"These people know about comedy, don't they?"
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"They know what they're talking about, but the general public, I mean..."
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"You said if you get your own show, the offers would come flooding in."
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"You said the phone would never stop ringing."
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"Have you had any phone calls at all?"
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"-No. -No."
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"-Oh, no. What am I talking about? Sky called. -And?"
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"They say they can put your dish up Thursday."
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"-Hello. -What are you doing?"
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"I'm actually flicking through the phone book and I'm pointing my finger on a random page"
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"to see what my name could be if I wanted to change it."
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"-What have you got? -PB Grout."
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"-Good. As long as you're filling your days. -CT Punchaganowno."
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"But I don't look like a Punchaganowno."
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"-Are you hungry? -Yeah."
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"-Greasy spoon? -Yeah."
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"-Where am I meeting you? -Garage in 10 minutes?"
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"Yep. Do you want to hear one more?"
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"-Oh, go on. -TP Bronze..."
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"-Hi. -Hi."
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"-Are you moving in? -Yeah."
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"Oh, good. I mean, do you want a hand?"
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"-No. I'm fine. -Phew."
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"I'm Andy by the way. I live here, obviously."
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"-I live on the 2nd floor, 21. -Okay."
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"-I'm Cathy. -Oh, nice to meet you."
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"-Nice to meet you. -Nice to meet you."
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"-Welcome to the building. -Thanks. It's nice to see someone under 40."
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"I thought I'd moved into an old people's home."
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"No. There are some oldies in there, some over 40s, but they're quiet."
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"-Got the old telly there. Watch a lot of telly? -I don't, no."
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"No? Last night, BBC One?"
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"-No? -No."
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"Some good stuff on."
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"-Okay. -Okay."
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"Well, if you need someone to show you around at all, just come and..."
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"-Thanks. That'd be nice. -Oh, good..."
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"-All right. -Okay."
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"-See you later. -See you, bye."
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"-I saw it last night. -And?"
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"Yeah. It was good."
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"-Are you just saying that? -No."
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"Too long a pause. If you're gonna lie, lie well."
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"Bits of it were funny."
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"-It doesn't count. You laugh at anything. -What?"
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"I found you laughing to yourself once, and I said, "What are you laughing at?""
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"-And you said, "My toes." -Oh, yeah. Ha!"
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"They are funny, though, the way they waggle."
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"It's you that's making them waggle."
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"-Spare any change? -Sorry, mate."
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"-Okay. Have a nice day. -Cheers."
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"-And good luck with the show, Andy! -Cheers. How does he know who I am?"
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